family or dreams

Truly sad when some families have to sacrifice like this because once the years pass there is no getting them back. Though no one really wants to do this some countries do not make it easy on some to get jobs. When it comes to situations like you mentioned it also has to be very difficult on the fathers too.

Ooppppssss direct hit to me my friend but no problem. I admit lots of things gone between me and my children. For almost 17 years away from them lots of responsibility being a father are not given from my side. I cannot say I supplied all of their needs through financial aspect but your correct the comfort of life and deprived of a fatherly figure are missing. Anyway thank God for modern technology because despite of I'm away everyday morning and night we have communication with them.. I know all the things about them only physical present is absent... see you around

I guess it depends on the situation. If the couple has more kids and needed more money to sustain them,the father should work more even if it would take 10 years away from them. But, if the family can just bear to live a simpler life while being altogether, it was another story. Husband and wife should know which way to go or which path to cross.. Simple life or much better life with consequences?

No wants to be away from their family. No parents wants to be away and not with their family,. No mother or father wants to missed their kids growing. If only they will be given enough salary to give a decent life for their family- they won't leave and work abroad. Who wants to work in a foreign country and always be insulted and degrade anyway? Even those professionals...they're not spared from insults and other kind of harassment from foreign countries-not to mention the danger,the homesickness they are fighting for just to give their family a decent and bright future. No one wants to away from their family...no ONE!

I feel pity over these family. The parents, the father, mother or both of them had to leave the rest of the family to give them a better life is just not how I pictured a family with a better life. Kids need their parents, not just better education, or better lifestyle. Having parents to grow up with is still different from all those.

This does not happen only with the husbands/fathers, this happens with mothers/wives too. And the sad thing, as you say, is that the children are deprived of the love, care, and guidance of the absent father/mother. (And of course, let's not forget the spouse too. The distance and time spent away from each other may prove detrimental to a relationship...) The root of the problem is the lack of job opportunities locally that pay enough for people to support their family. That is what drives them abroad. That is one thing the government needs to work on. Sometimes I wonder if this idea that's popular nowadays - that OFWs are seen as 'new heroes' (bagong bayani), does not have it's negative effects. Does the government now rely so heavily on the dollars that these OFWs bring in that they prefer Filipinos to work abroad? So much so that they do not think of ways to open up better job opportunities locally? And I think I digressed from the discussion. Did I? =P Family or dreams. I think both basically point to the family. The choice is actually between family (now) or dreams (future of the family). And the question is: which is the better choice, to sacrifice the present for the future, or to choose the present but have an unsecured and uncertain future?

Sometimes there are reasons that husbands arent able to be with the family. My husband is currently serving in the united states marines and has been gone for over a year now. I miss him terribly but I know that he is working to keep our country safe. It is really hard but sometimes you have to do things to help your family financially.

I personally don't like working abroad, because we need to leave everything that we have behind and then go some other to get work or to earn more. The idea, as you said is okay if its for a short-term, but most of the individuals who work abroad ends up spending a major portion of their life there, away from family, but its life and everyone has there own reasons for the way they live.

Hiya vangie, A Father is needed in his House and yet he may still have to leave to make money for his Family if he is forced to. Yet it is not a good idea for him to stay too long in another Country if he does have to go and work there. Here Spanish Men are working in other Countries doing a Job that they could have easily done here but at the moment everything is a big mess. When the situation rights itself they will come back and work here again they have said that themselves. Actually they are not earning much more over there than what they would have done here except they are paying to keep their Families going and fed and clothed. It needs a Father and a Mother to bring the Children up properly but sometimes it is not possible altogether.xxx

Yes, i agree with you. It's understandable if the father has to be away for 3 to 4 years in order to earn enough and have a business of his own and live with the family. But for a father to be away most of the time, i think the children grows up feeling lonely, specially on occasions that calls for a father, like a threat to the safety of the family . it's sad too that the father is on a far away land working hard, yet the children are growing wayward because there's no guidance from a father. Sad, but it really happens to many.

hi, w3e all know that the poverty will push us to work in another far places,but for me i would rather choose to work that near to my family because i wanted to be with them,there were a times that i had many opportunities but still i choose to work here just to be with my family,because i know later on each of us will be separated to each other too.

I really don't like the idea of having to grow up and have a husband who will not be able to spend any time with me and our children. I have already decided against it, and I really don't like the idea. It's hard enough that a man has to work his whole life, and that I might work too. But to be in another country or state? That's just not okay to me.

I grew up without a father and I turned out just fine! :D but I understand what you're saying. I do think that it is important for a family to bond and spend time together. Providing for a family is important and someone has to do it, in some cases both the husband and the wife must provide. There are ways to get around not seeing a father though. Today's technology is very advanced. There's things such a Skype that could enable them to see and hear their father. It's nearly just the same. But then again someone could argue that there is no nurture in that.

I hope it does not happen to me. I think it's not the best solution, leaving family for long time still be bad. Especially for children, they will fell deprived of love from his father. I'm sure there are many other solutions to solve financial problems without having to leave the family for long time.

People go abroad for earning more money. After getting used to more earnings very few people (people like me who are retired may do)will feel like working for lesser salary/earning. so they cannot return to native country. Very rarely I have seen people returning to native country -- this case they returned for the sake of giving native culture to their children.

It is definitely true that kids should not be deprived from a fatherly figured for this will really have a great impact to their individual lives. But sometimes family in this situation usually has no choice at all for being away from the head of the family may be the only way they are provided. But as much as possible, fathers should look for a better way to provide without being away from their lovedones.

It's hard choice but I found it a lot around me.But honestly, how difficult situation of our family ( not happen now ), I don't want to lvie separately with my husband.I will ask him to get job with extra effort, no matter how far from home but not have to live separately with me.I want to grow up kids together with my husband because it will feel different with or without husband in family, it;s different for my kids to grow up withour her dad.

I also hate this. It makes one feel lonely and abandoned.