When you had your first child did you feel you were ready?

United States
June 22, 2011 5:40pm CST
When I had my first child I hadn't planned on having children at that time. I wanted to wait a few years more. I guess a person can do all the preparing necessary and still not feel ready to take on the responsibilities of being a parent. Now that I'm a parent I love my child dearly. I know that had it been a different time in my life I would not be blessed with the wonderful and precious child I have now.
1 person likes this
11 responses
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
23 Jun 11
I was already matured emotionally when i had our child. I felt ready having her, even if there are still some things to know on how to take care of her. As she grows up, i learned things about taking care of her.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
24 Sep 11
I think, my friend , it's part of a woman's intuition to know how to take care of her baby.
• United States
23 Sep 11
I'm glad that you were ready for your daughter. It does make a world of difference. I do agree with you that as our children grow we continually learn more and more about how to take care of them. Thanks so much for sharing with me.
@EdnaReyes (2622)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
I thought then I was pretty ready for her but as days passes by, there's so many things to learn, so many things to do, so many things to have and then I said to m self, why i did not prepare for this? I guess what's only ready was my heart to accept her as she is and love her with all of my heart as a new mother.
• United States
21 Sep 11
I agree taking care of our child involves a lot of work and time.Time does pass by quickly. It is rewarding though to see our child learn and grow. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts.
@maximax8 (31046)
• United Kingdom
23 Jun 11
I bought my cottage when I was 19 years old and worked as a container marketing controller. It was very upsetting to be made redundant when I was 20 years old. I tried hard to get another job but it proved way to challenging. I let out my cottage and got a working holiday visa for Australia. I traveled around the world for just over one year. I got the idea to become a teacher and wanted to begin teacher training when I got home. I was in Cairns and I had all my clothes on the washing line stolen. I had been working there for a charity. I was on my way back to Sydney instead of going on to Darwin. On that train in the club local car I met a man. He was vegetarian, liked animals and was keen on traveling. I felt I had met my ideal man. I went back home months later and he joined me. We got married and then at 22 years old I got pregnant. I had been surprised because I had planned to study. I had my baby son born at home and felt ready for him. My marriage lasted for 6 years and then we got divorced. I had another relationship and had another baby at 34 years old and my final baby at 36 years old. I wasn't very happy in the last month of my second pregnancy. My second child has got spina bifida and hydrocephalus. I have got 3 lovely children: my 16 year old son, my 4 year old disabled son and my almost 2 year old daughter. My children so very special to me and are treasured.
• United States
21 Sep 11
I'm happy that you have three wonderful children. I'm sorry to hear that your second son has spina bifida. It is so hard to see our children suffer and be in pain. It does amaze me how strong and happy a child who has disabilities is. who despite all that they go through they are positive and caring.
@de_toya (2429)
• Indonesia
23 Jun 11
Yes. I had ready for my first child. I had prepared anything for my first child. We had married for 3 years when my first child born on April, 2006. We were not ready for the child when we married. We married in July, 2003 and we had planned to had a child in the next three or four years. I am grateful that our plans go as expected. My wife had not pregnant without any contraception. Currently, we have two children. My son is 5 years old and my daughter is 2 years old. I love them very much and either with my wife.
• United States
23 Sep 11
I'm glad that things worked out good for you and your wife with planning for your child. There is a lot involved in taking care of your child/ren. So it's a good thing when we are able to be prepared. For those of us who were surprised it is still a joy to be able to get to know and raise our child in an upright way.
• Philippines
23 Jun 11
Not really but I prefer to be a good mom so every new thing for me is a challenge and eventually it goes pretty well for me. I enjoyed every minute of it. I learned a lot from day one and so forth. Everything is a challenge and I survived it. You just have to love what you are doing and enjoy it.
• United States
24 Sep 11
I agree being a new parent is very challenging. There are so many things that need to be done and that we have to work on. I'm glad that you survived it. And I hope that with time I will continue to improve and learn all about parenting.
• Philippines
23 Jun 11
I had my first child at the age of 24. I'm a single parent. Yes at first im scared to be a parent without a partner. I ask myself if i can be a good parent then? Can i provide things for him. But in everyday i see him it helps to have a goal and dream more for him. So hard on me but thanks to God was able to stand alone for him. And his my best buddy now. I love my son so much.
• United States
24 Sep 11
I'm so glad that you were able to be the type of parent you wanted to be with raising your son. It would be extremely hard to be a single parent. Especially raising a small infant starting out on your own. I'm happy that you have such a good relationship with your son. It truly is a wonderful thing.
• United States
22 Jun 11
I had my first child when I was 31 and yes that was on purpose. In my twenties I just wanted to have fun and live my life as I saw fit. That is exactly what I did. I was maturity ready and financially I suppose. I was still surprised at the responsibility of an infant, so maybe we are never truly ready.
• United States
23 Sep 11
I'm glad that you were able to do all the things that you wanted to during your twenties. That is what we were planning to do. To enjoy our young adulthood, do all the things that we wanted to do, and when I turned thirty I hoped to have had a child. Things didn't work out that way though, lol. We got a surprise with my pregnancy with our little girl. We are happy though, and she is so dear to us. Even though things didn't go exactly as planned we are doing well. And there are a lot of responsibility that comes along with having a child. I'm glad though that we were able to make it as long as we did.
@asyria51 (2861)
• United States
23 Jun 11
I got pregnant on accident, but it happened when my husband and i were talking about having kids or trying to have kids in the near future. I honestly think that if it were up to my husband that right time would never have happened. i love my child, but my husband is just now, after 2 and a half years, accepting the changes that have occured. Not getting enough sleep and a diminished social life being the most prominent side effects.
@jameygc (452)
• United States
23 Jun 11
No, I wasn't ready. I wanted to do a lot of things before have a baby. But as you say God blessed me having this baby. He gave me the opportunity to feel this huge love that I feel now. Never in my life I felt this way before. Be a mother is one of the best things happen to me. I can't complain about nothing. I had time to enjoy as a single girl. I had a very good time having party with my girlfriends but now I am in another beautiful step in my life. I can say I am full of happiness now even when I was not prepared to take this step in my life.
• United States
21 Sep 11
I too wanted to wait longer before having my little girl. There were a lot more things i wanted to do before having a child. Now i look forward to doing more things together as a family. Our daughter is so precious to us that we are happy that she is apart of our life.
• Valdosta, Georgia
23 Jun 11
I was more than ready with our first child. I had a miscarriage before her and it broke my heart. So, we tried for another year to have a baby and I wasn't getting pregnant. I was starting to think I couldn't have kids =( But, we did have kids and I was ready for all 3 of them. =) I was young when we were trying so maybe that's all it was...We had our first daughter when I was 20.
• United States
23 Jun 11
I was 19 when we decided to have our first. We had a few grand in the bank, lived in a nice house, husband had a good job. After I got pregnant with our second, we lost everything and are seriously struggling to make ends meet. Just goes to show you no matter how ready you think you are, things can change in a heartbeat. But I wouldn't give up either of my children. They are my life and I love them both so much.
• United States
23 Sep 11
I'm happy that you were able to start out so well. But I'm sorry that you now are struggling and have lost the things that you had. It is crazy how things can change so fast. We think at times that we are so prepared for everything but we never know. I too worry about if we invest in some many different things what will happen if we lose it. Right now we don't own a home but my husband would like to buy one, it is very scary to me because things can really change in the blink of an eye. I hope that things are improving a bit for you and your family.