I know she loves me but...
By menace730
@menace730 (506)
Philippines
June 30, 2011 8:15am CST
I am an american living happily in the Philippines to the most beautiful women in the world. We courted for two years before getting married and love each other very much. We are both in our 50's and feel that God brought us together. She is my soul mate.
However... when I cross a street she grabs me like I am one of the grand children and directs my every move while crossing. If I'm going down a set of stairs she holds me like I'm going to fall. She has even scolded me when I have not looked both ways before crossing the street. Now you might be thinking I'm crippled or impaired in some way, but I'm not. I'm in excellent health and probably in better health than most people my age. Is this a Filipino custom?
I know it sounds like I'm complaining but I'm not. Like I said I know she loves me and I find it very cute...but geez I'm a grown man. lol
3 people like this
12 responses
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
30 Jun 11
I don't know if it's a Filipino custom or not as I'm not familiar with their customs. I personally think that she's feeling it took her dayum near 50 years to find you & she's going to do her best to keep you healthy & with her as freakin long as possible!!! Maybe she's just a nurturing kind of person. 
My Mom & Dad were married for 65 years & he treated her like that until the day she passed. When I'm driving & have to slam on the brakes, I'm notorious for throwing my arm out to stop my passenger from hitting the dash. Most yell at me because they are wearing their seatbelt!!! 
Just take it as a sign that she LOVES YOU VERY MUCH & appreciate it in the way she's offering it!!!! 
My Mom & Dad were married for 65 years & he treated her like that until the day she passed. When I'm driving & have to slam on the brakes, I'm notorious for throwing my arm out to stop my passenger from hitting the dash. Most yell at me because they are wearing their seatbelt!!! Just take it as a sign that she LOVES YOU VERY MUCH & appreciate it in the way she's offering it!!!! 1 person likes this
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
30 Jun 11
P.S. ... Maybe if you started looking both ways when you crossed the street, she might trust you to do the other things for yourself!!!
1 person likes this
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
Yes I know she loves me and like I said I find it very cute. I used to put my hand across my daughters when I had to make a sudden stop also. Like my hand would protect her.
Ha ha ha...look both ways. You got me on that one Marissa. LOL
2 people like this
@kareemadivina (1230)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
As what you said; she loves you that's why she's caring for you like that.Filipinos are really caring person,the reason why they are always one of the best wives in the world.As people matures,it's really normal to feel that way.We always want to feel that in control and independent especially for a men.I think it's sweet when two people on your age are still caring for each other that way, especially now that divorce and separation are happening everywhere.
1 person likes this
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Yes, I see that Filipino women are very caring. I have even had some younger girls move over on the jitney so I would not have to make by way up front. Whew...I thank them because I am 6'1" tall and the jitneys were not meany for me..lol
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
28 Jul 11
You are a grown man but she is worried that you might get hurt . She Knows how the drivers are and she just wants you to survive your walk! It isn't that she thinks of you as a little boy. She just wants to keep you safe.
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
28 Jul 11
That's sweet. It just shows Everyone how much you love each other.
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
29 Jul 11
Yes we do...I cannot imagine my life without her.
1 person likes this
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
28 Jul 11
yes I know and I love her sooo much for it. Now I grab her first and make sure she looks both ways before crossing and we laugh as we are crossing the street. People must think we are nuts. lol
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Jul 11
hi menace thats great that you love her and yes in a way I think it is sort of a Filipino custom. I am also an American,lady senior citizen type but have
a Filipino friend who insists on giving me little snacks every time she passes my table. and she persists in holding my walker when I get to my feet, they are just simply very caring and its sometimes feels like you are being smothered .but think of this some wives do not even walk with their hubbies at all let alone hang onto them. they really do not mean to be so almost too caring so its their nature.
a Filipino friend who insists on giving me little snacks every time she passes my table. and she persists in holding my walker when I get to my feet, they are just simply very caring and its sometimes feels like you are being smothered .but think of this some wives do not even walk with their hubbies at all let alone hang onto them. they really do not mean to be so almost too caring so its their nature.@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Thanks Hatley...yes they are very caring and as someone said above, I think they are the best wives a man could have.
Hi fujisaki61...It's nice to see a loving couple care for each other. Like our vows say. In sickness and in health. I'm glad you honored your grandpa's wish to stay in his house. he had alot of memories there.
@tammy27 (1241)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
it's a Filipino custom in an over-reacting way.. it's normal for Filipinos to be more caring than others, but not in that way. we have tons of filipino-american couples here in our neighborhood, and i know why she's acting like that.... but you might get mad at me if i'll tell you.... :(
@tammy27 (1241)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
i just fear that you might think im making a negative person out of the girl you love.
most Filipinos when they see their fellow Filipino with a handsome man, they will often think "shocks!! she's sooo da** lucky! she's soo this and that, etc." they look at that lucky woman as a queen, a goddess. and remember, that is if this one Filipino woman is with a Filipino HANDSOME man. what more if a Filipino woman is with a foreigner... it may sound kinda childish, or non-sense but that's how most Filipinos are. that is why when a woman is with a foreigner or even just a handsome fellow Filipino, these women tend to stand tall, act as if they were they most perfect couple, try to tell everybody "he i got a big fish here". most Filipino-American couples here in our neighborhood act that way. and when others tell them "you're so lucky, both of you must be sooo loving to each other" often the Filipino woman would answer "oh yes, maybe im meant to catch a fish this big. im very lucky indeed"
1 person likes this
@genesisgroldan (214)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
That is so sweet of your wife. Being married for 50 years indeed made a great history for you both. It's good to know that you have made God as the center of your relationship. I find it cute that your wife is treating you like a little child. It seems that she is spoiling you when it should not be. Just be grateful with her for her act of sweetness. You may miss that every now and then when you are not together so cherish every moment with her. God bless you!
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Well, we have not been married for 50 years. We are both in our 50's.
And yes I am grateful for having someone that really cares about me. And your right, when I go out by myself I do miss her.
Thanks genesisgroldan.
@swirlz (3136)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
From my point of view, I guess it's okay. I'm scared of crossing the streets, it's so dangerous. Especially vehicles here in Manila, they drive like maniacs.
I'm not sure if it's a custom. I do that too, to small children. When I'm with adults, I'm usually the one who holds on to them. hehe
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
Well your right they do drive like maniacs here also.
1 person likes this
@grace24 (1050)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Most likely women here in the Philippines tends to act like that. Be proud if she is doing that to you because it only means that she loves you and she cares for you. She doesn't want you to get hurt that why she is acting like that. Well, I think you are lucky.
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
I am lucky grace...I am very lucky.
I am lucky to spend the rest of my life with her. She is very beautiful and I am a tall not to good looking American. I always tell her she is Beauty and I am the Beast. lol
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
For me yes it has the said that she is in you because she love you if can't understand it it is hard to understand everything.
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
I understand ebuscat, I just felt silly sometimes. You know the tipical man thing.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Your wife is just so concerned with your safety.
Being a foreigner here in the Philippines, she is thinking that you might meet an accident, because you still don't know how careless some drivers are and how hurried some people are when they walk, that they might just hit or bump you.
It's not scolding, it's just one way of telling you in an anxious manner when you didn't look both ways. That's because some drivers are so careless and the street have two way lanes for coming and going vehicles, they might hit you.
Won't you do the same too, if you and your wife is in your own place too? I guess you will, because you care.
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Your right...the traffic here is crazy and to tell the truth I have come close to being bumped a few times. (don't tell my wife lol)
And yes I would also do the same for her here or anywhere. I now try to hold her arm and guide her sometimes and she laughs.
@ritzz07 (788)
• India
30 Jun 11
hi menace730
I want to say only one thing here that you are a lucky guy that someone loves you and takes care of you.so dont loose the person and you need to take care of the person as well............she might be in love with you and dont want to express her emotions or feeling.......however you are a guy and you can tell her but do carefully whatever you wanna do...........make sure she wont feel bad.....
thank you
have a great day!!!!!
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Thanks ritzz...yes I know she loves me and we laugh now when I bring up her guiding me through the streets.., I love her very much and would never make her feel bad intentionally.
@fujisaki61 (75)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Hi menace730 you remind me of my grandfather many years ago he was 86 at that time. He always complained whenever we brought him to the city where vehicles moved from everywhere the same gesture your wife has showed to you especially in crossing the streets. Man you are lucky for that gesture is not found in women who grew up in the city. But generally women in the Philippines tend to be like that. It was a kind of care that dates back hundreds of years. Honestly my own wife is not like that but there are other forms of affection so enjoy my friend. Love the one you are with.
@menace730 (506)
• Philippines
1 Jul 11
Hey fujisaki61... I'm not 86 yet lol.
It's a great tradition and I hope men here see that and cherish it also.
