if a woman is unattached with no suitors... does it mean she's unattractive?

@chiyosan (30183)
Philippines
July 2, 2011 10:03pm CST
what do you think? i often see girls who are really physically attractive, they are even very pleasant, nice friends but how come they don't get to attract men to court them? especially here in the philippines where a woman waits for a guy to ask you out and we do not usually go and find ourselves men... i am attached but majority of my friends are not... when we go out i always have my boyfriend tag along but my friends always are just there and its only them with no suitors and i always find them really very pretty, very great people.. how come no one's courting them? how come no one has noticed them? I even kid with them and told them i would try to go and find them a date. hehe but then its just of course a joke amongst us friends and they already are worried too... we are 30 yo by the way. From guys: why do you think these women are not attractive to men? what do you think we can to make some notice them and try to get to know them a little bit more?? thank you!!
3 people like this
9 responses
@angie20 (191)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
It doesn't mean that if a woman doesn't have any suitors she's not attractive. There are many factors to consider about this situation. Some guys feel intimidated if the woman they secretly like are too beautiful for them. They feel insecure and as a man by nature, ego also matters. While on the other hand, some guys prefer courting woman within their circles like an already known friend or a "barkada". It is because they have known the woman and quite sure of the qualities also. Lastly, may be they lack charisma or appeal? I meet people who are not that physically appealing yet have many suitors in the list. But one thing for sure, these people have something inside them that attracts the male populace. I'm a woman so I don't have any idea what a man looks for a girl. I think that's one of the disadvantages of a girl in our country; we have to wait for a boy to ask us out before confessing our feelings.
1 person likes this
• Brazil
21 Jul 11
Sometimes, I feel the same way as you. I wish it was normal to girls ask guys out, but I just can't do this either.
@GemmaR (8517)
3 Jul 11
I don't think that it means they are unattractive. There are lots of things in a woman that attract men, not just what they look like. It may be that they are either too shy or too confident, both of which can scare a man away sometimes. Also, if a woman is very attractive, men might not even bother trying to become an item with them because they can often assume that they already have a partner as it is hard to believe that such an attractive woman could possibly be single. It took me a long time to find a partner, yet people would flirt with me on a daily basis.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4655)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Absolutely, not. Men have different tastes and they have different reasons why they do not court a girl even if that girl is attractive. One reason is intimidation. Guys tend to get intimidated when they think this girl has that aura of having everything. For example, a girl is attractive and successful on other aspects, there is a tendency that guys would get intimidated by the girl's personality.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Jul 11
hi chiyosan but what makes you think that the majority of your friends may not also have boy friends. Not all friends will share that with just casual friends. Some friends will be very selective with whom they share the news they are dating so and so.Also a woman who is not a ten does not necessarily mean she will not attract a man, not a lot of men, but one man who sees her real inner beauty instead. I do not think that all of your pretty friends are not also dating someone. All women do not tell about their love life. I was 31 before I found the man who was meant for me.I had dated quietly not talking about it as they were not right for me. An unattached attractive woman also may be just where she wants to be as now days an attractive woman may be working on her career not on seeking marriage A lot of women have found they do not need a man to get on with their lives. they cook, clean, work, and are self sufficient 'unto themselves. If they date its not out of need but out of wanting to date.Modern women work at jobs and care for themselves so do not look for some male to support them.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Jul 11
in california the cost of living is so high all adults in the family work just to pay the !@@##@#high rents.So many girls work and thus are not out man hunting at the present. they will say let them come to me as I am busy.
@chiyosan (30183)
• Philippines
6 Jul 11
hehe yeah. my friends and i are into our career too.. i guess that is right. most of them would tell me they are just busy with their work and have no time really to date and all. i mean for my friends... i know they are not lying about having no boyfriends or suitors at the moment. we have been friends for morre than 10 years already and yeah.. we keep track of each other, we are buddies... =)
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
3 Jul 11
No, but it might mean she is looking too hard. If you have a "come and get me" look, that might be scaring them away. Another possibility is you are not in the right place to be 'found'. I'm not sure where really good men are in your society, but figure out where the good men are, and go there. And finally, be patient. Do not jump on the first guy that shows interest. Being hasty with romance, is a great way to ruin your life. Take it easy. Enjoy life being single. There is nothing wrong with waiting for the guy to make the first move. In fact is a girl came up to me, and asked me out, I'd like turn that down. If I am interested, I'll come to you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
15 Jul 11
I think it's also the choice of women. My mother's friends are all in their 40's already and their all single. Of course at first I was surprised that they're all singles and already my mother's age. Anyway, I think it's really just the woman's choice. I mean if a woman really wants to have a boyfriend and she's pretty, then that's just easy. I believe there's nothing wrong with making the first move.
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
6 Jul 11
Hi! I'm one of those women. I'm actually wondering myself. A lot of people think I'm pretty and sexy. I don't even have a BO, and I actually smells nice. I'm not a snob, maybe just a little aloof but that's just because I'm shy at first. SO I'm really wondering myself why I don't have a boyfriend. The last time I got attached was a couple of years ago I think. I've even asked God why. lol I sometimes get lonely but I guess it's happening for a reason. I just don't think about it much. I just enjoy my single life to the best I can.
• Philippines
4 Jul 11
I can relate to this. I have been single all my life and I have friends too with the same situation. I am not sure as to why this happens. But it wasn't my choice. I do want to have a partner in life but no luck.
• Philippines
15 Jul 11
Yes, I totally I agree with you. I also observe this situation. Well I am single and most of my girl friends are single too. We've been looking for these men everywhere haha but still no luck. Most of them are married or taken already. Maybe there is scarcity of men nowadays.