Is it normal for an employee to give gifts to her boss?
By CrimsonRain
@CrimsonRain (336)
United States
July 3, 2011 11:01pm CST
Okay, I am a guy and I work as a store manager in a small department store, and I have this female associate who will always give me gifts. Like for example, last Christmas, she gave me chocolates and a Christmas card. And then when her mom came to visit from China, she gave me Chinese goodies. Last week, on my birthday, she gave me a card and a 20 dollar Starbucks gift card because she knows I love Starbucks. Is it normal? I mean, is she just being nice? Or is she sucking up to me?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@theknute (183)
•
4 Jul 11
It sounds like she is very friendly and generous. Also, since her mother did the same, I am sure it is how she was raised, that her family gives gifts often, or culturally, gift giving could be very common with her ethnic group and where she is from. I think you have nothing to worry about. Enjoy the gifts!
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Yea, her mom was very nice when I met her. Sounds like you are right. I enjoyed the gifts so much! Haven't used my gift card yet though. I might use it tomorrow. Thank you!
1 person likes this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
5 Jul 11
Thank you so much! I'm at peace now. :) Happy 4th of July, btw! :) I'll work harder so that my other employees will give me presents in the future too! Lol! :)
@theknute (183)
•
5 Jul 11
I saw others saying she was crushing on you, but I would not worry about it. As long as she doesn't make any comments suggesting otherwise, I would continue to assume that she is kind and is a giver. If she crosses a line otherwise, then would be the time to call her on it, but not before. I saw that you said you hugged her after she gave you a birthday gift. I think that is totally normal and acceptable, as long as she didn't seem taken aback, which I'm sure she didn't.
1 person likes this
@lilybug (21107)
• United States
4 Jul 11
I have given my bosses gifts in the past. I don't know about a $20 gift card though. I probably would have just brought you a drink from Starbucks on your birthday to be honest. I brought my last boss a Sweet Tea from McDonald's on her birthday because I know it is one of her favorite drinks.
She could be sucking up, but she could also just be a really friendly employee.
2 people like this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Okay, I'll just look at her as a really friendly employee. Thanks for the response! (Actually, I'd rather have a gift card than an actual drink. It's much easier to carry. Maybe I was just overwhelmed by her kindness that I got as far as to think that she was sucking up.)
1 person likes this
@Amanda81587 (3042)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Well to me this sounds like a more than friendly co-worker. Yes she has given others gifts as well around the holidays but it seems like she is going beyond to do things for you. Usually this occurs when a girl likes a guy. It sounds to me like she likes you a little bit more than you are expecting. This may making things awkward but I think she likes you.
1 person likes this
@Amanda81587 (3042)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Yeah. If your feelings are not the same I would suggest you talk to her about it. Maybe she is getting mixed signals from you because you are not aware of this and keep accepting the gifts.
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
It's hard to assume. But I did give her a hug when I got the birthday gift to show her my gratitude and appreciation.
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
4 Jul 11
It is difficult to say for sure, especially since I do not know how she acts on a regular basis and what she does for others. It does sound like she is just a nice person that is being generous. You said that you are new at your position, so maybe she is just trying to make sure that you know that people think you are doing a good job ... she is trying to help you feel more secure and appreciated in your new position, especially since it can be difficult to be a new boss.
A couple other people said that she might have a crush on you. This is a possibility as well. I would not say anything to her about this, though, as it could be quite embarrassing and make work awkward, especially if this is not the case and she is just trying to be nice to you and show you that you are doing a good job as a boss.
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
5 Jul 11
Well, how do you feel about her? Are you hoping that she is just being a nice and sweet girl that is showing her appreciation and friendship for her boss or are you hoping that she has deeper feelings for you?
1 person likes this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
She's always been nice and sweet ever since I hired her. She's a little bit quiet too but always wears a smile on her face. A typical shy Asian girl, she is. You may be right, so I won't assume that she has a crush on me. That would be too much. Lol. And I really appreciate all her gifts and all her forms of niceness. Thanks for the response!
@MakingCents (743)
•
4 Jul 11
I think it's normal for employees to give their bosses small gifts on special occasions. It's also normal for bosses to give their employees small gifts on special occasions. Does she have other bosses at work? For instance are there other managers in the store? Does she get everyone gifts?
2 people like this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Yes, I remember she also had presents for my assistant manager last Christmas. Oh well, I think you're right. She's just being nice. She's very nice really. Thank you! I just thought it wasn't normal because she's the only one who's been doing that so far (I'm kinda new in my position), and she hasn't missed any single occasion yet! She also gave me easter candies on Easter! I'm guessing she's already prepping up something for me tomorrow, July 4th! Lol.
1 person likes this
@keeegan_ess (512)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Aww that's actually really sweet of her. I don't think she's sucking up. It doesn't seem like it to me by the way you described her. Well, from my experience, people of Asian decent love to give gifts to people. I remember I had an Asian friend who would always give gifts to me. It would either be big or small, but it'd be a gift nonetheless. So she's probably just trying to be nice. Or she might have a crush on you! Sometimes it's hard to tell whether someone is just being nice or if they are flirting with you because they have a crush on you.
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Yeah, she is very sweet. I love all my Asian associates. They're the most hardworking. Oh, one question, I was quite a bit overwhelmed when she gave me a birthday gift that I gave her a hug. You think that was okay?
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
4 Jul 11
Ahahahha! Lol, you're right. She may have just gotten it from a GPT site!!!
@surfer222 (1714)
• Indonesia
5 Jul 11
It easy to check weather she's just being nice or she have a hidden motive... if you recieve a give that you think is a bit expensive (like 20 dollar starbucks gift card) you ask her: "are you sure to give me this gift? because it a bit expensive", but in a joking tone of voice so she doesn't feel awkward. maybe she'll give a respond that will answer your question
1 person likes this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
5 Jul 11
I actually asked her that. When she gave me the card, I was like, "Gosh, are you serious?" and she just stood there, nodding her head, motioning me to open it. Well, after reading all your comments, I have come to the conclusion that she was just being a nice and friendly employee. Happy 4th of July! :)