How would you deal with people who discounts what you feel?
By Danzylop
@Danzylop (1120)
Philippines
August 5, 2011 3:23am CST
I am really having trouble with this question. So many people around the me discounts what the people around may feel. I dont understand the kind of thinking they have that they dont think about the emotions of others. I consider them selfish. They will do whatever they want to do. They will say whatever they want to. And when you finally got hurt about what they do or say, they wont do anything to pacify, or ask an apology.
2 people like this
7 responses
@toniganzon (72533)
• Philippines
5 Aug 11
When you say discount, do you mean disregard? If this is so, then i would have to answer it this way.
Some people are not sensitive to other's feelings are some as just so tactful. It doesn't necessarily mean they are selfish but it's in their nature not to be sensitive, though most of the people who disregard other's feelings are actually selfish, this is not the general rule.
I had a classmate in law school before who were hated by almost everybody and that included me for being so insensitive and she would say hurtful words to others because she's too honest, blunt and tactful. When we had the chance to live under one roof for 6 months, i came to like her very much and i confronted her about her behavior. She told me that she really wasn't aware that she hurts other people by being too hones and too blunt. From then on she started becoming more sensitive. And now we are really good friends.
1 person likes this
@Danzylop (1120)
• Philippines
5 Aug 11
thanks toni.
But that, I think is OK. if a person hurts the other UNCONCIOUSLY (meaning you never confronted her that they did hurt someones feelings) that is OK.
I ve talked to her everytime. But she doesnt talk back. And when I started to nag (ofcourse because you were hurt and you want to express your emotion, but when I did, I was still conscious of my words) she said "Hilom na be!" a bisayan word which means SHUT UP! and "and dami mong satsat" (you are talking too much).
@toniganzon (72533)
• Philippines
5 Aug 11
I thought you were discussing people's attitude in general and not your own experience.
Thanks for this clarification. You should have asked her why she's like that. From what you wrote i can sense that she's really annoyed.
1 person likes this
@thetis74 (1525)
•
5 Aug 11
There are so many people like that and it's possibly because they think they are much better than others and their opinion is always right and that others are wrong. They only value their feelings and don't consider others. It's okay. Just try to avoid them. They will only hurt you without even feeling guilty about it.
@Danzylop (1120)
• Philippines
5 Aug 11
yeah. absolutely. I am so tired of trying to convince them to understand me. I maybe wrong for my acts but they dont have the right to judge me, afterall, they dont know the real story behind me. They dont know both sides of my actions. As soon as they see that my action is deviant from their belief, they will criticize me and insult me as a person. I really dont understand this kind of people. PERFECTLY opposite to mine. ALL my actions are guided with the emotions I have for other people. If i know I can hurt with an action, i always hesitate to do it. I dont want to be a burden inside someones heart. That is the reason why, I always ask my self, what kind of mind they have that they dont have considerations for others.
They see my wrong. But they dont see theirs. and when I tell them about theirs, they will whine at you exactly the same as they criticize you when they think you did something wrong.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
18 Aug 11
What is this wrongful acts that you did that made them judge you? you know in our country, racial discrimination and being judgmental is the main reason as to why i don't react much if foreigner judge us. i think the best way is to avoid them because they don't care if you explained to them and they won't ever care for it.have
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
5 Aug 11
The moment Anyone discounts how I feel , I write them off. I see them as callous and insensitive and I will not be in their presence Ever again.
1 person likes this
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
18 Aug 11
Karma will hit them for sure. THere was a mylotter who was like that most specially when it comes to politics. the only mistake he made for me was to accuse me of something I didn't do. later in the end, his sarcasm and insults caught him off guard by the admin. I believe people will like that will get what they deserve in the end with out knowing. 
and I pity them. have anice day
and I pity them. have anice day
@motorizedmillie (138)
• United States
5 Aug 11
When I encounter people who discount my feelings, I stay away from them once it happens. If the people doing it are members of my family, I tend to keep my distance from them and will only speak to them when absolutely necessary, such as at a family event.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
14 Aug 11
Generally, people treat you the way you treat them or else, they will ignore you. If you behave selfishly, they will ignore you first, then eventually become selfish. If you are self centred and thoughtless, close friends will behave the same way but first they will ignore you.
You cannot be thinking of yourself all the time because your behaviour influences those around you, especially those you are close to. Try to think about how you treat others before you criticize how they treat you.
Good luck.
