How would react when you found out the person you love is cheating you ?
By edumate
@rollylolly (2843)
India
August 8, 2011 1:00pm CST
If oneday it becomes clear to you that the person you love,the most dependable and honest(according to you)person in your life is cheating on you . You obviously will get shattered and the whole world would seem meaningless for you . It can be your husband or fiance, for whom you thought you could even die . How would you react in such a situation and how would you reveal your condition to him ? Would you be able to forgive and trust him again if he apoligizes and promises to come back to you ?
3 people like this
17 responses
@igatiful_badass (1222)
• Philippines
9 Aug 11
Well its so sad to know and heart breaking.
So far never had it. But hope it will not happen to me.
But if ever that happen i don't what can i do to him. It's not that i will react violently but definitely i will have some heart to heart talk with him. Maybe given a chance but if happen again i think thats the cue to a goodbye dear love one.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
So well said in short . I too feel we must give a chance and if things go the same way the 'goodbye' is the best answer . Thanks igatiful_badass for your response .
@sonamr (6)
• India
8 Aug 11
Dear i understand it is to deal with such situation,its realy sad that the person you loves cheat u.Bt to forgt the person or not depends on circumstances.He may have done this because of some reasons,the condition of that person must b given a thought.Bt if the person have done it intentionally then never pardon him.he dont deserves to be a part of anybody's life.
1 person likes this
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
You are right . We need to well consider things and if it can be a case of forgiveness we must give him a chance . Life is so short and we must be merciful enough if at all the sin is not that great .
@Princelierocks (817)
• India
9 Aug 11
Hi friend, At the initial stage when it comes to my notice that the person i love is cheating on me i would be really depressed, very thing will be like darkness to me around the world, for some days i would react very lonely and inactive in nature because of the shock i got from my cheating GF. But life doesn't end over here we all need to move on, we cannot except a person to be faithful especially during this horrible time running in world, no matter how charming the Boy/girl is, his/her talk can be soothing as honey, if we want to a life partner for our future we need to have some tests done cause that's how today the relationship world goes on. So my friend don't worry with one or two rejections in life our world doesn't end. God has some good plans for us and iam sure its his plans we will not understand unless and until we are with him, So trust god whatever happens in life make God as your soul mate he will surely help you.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
Thank you so much for your inspiring words . Actually my friend is going through such a situation and I really want to help her .You are right that we must take some tests in today's world before choosing our life partner . The better is to pray to God and seek His help in every matter of our lives .
@QeeGood (1213)
• Sweden
9 Aug 11
It is a hurtful situation to discover someone is cheating on you. I would questioned why he/she is doing it? Are they aware of what consequences they are causing.
I've been in the situation being accused for cheating, which was false allegations. The man I was with controlled and checked up everything I did, Any place I was any person I had been talking with spending time with my whole life was investigated by him. He could not find any proof for his allegations, but in his mind I was. It was hard for me. Like the other way around when someone is really cheating is hurtful.
There is something wrong in a realtionship, when one is cheating. Things needs to be cleared up.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
Oh that's a very critical situation what you sufferred . Being accused of something which you have not done . It is a psychological problem on your man's part and can make life hell .
Cheating is more grave offence and has no justification and should be condemned . One or two cases forgiveness and mutual mingling can be entertained if at all there is possibility of mending the craked relationship.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I agree jonahh08 and QeeGood that trust is a very sensitive feeling and I too feel such swindle should not be encouraged . But somewhere in my mind I feel we can always give a chance to prove himself and if it fails we can leave . I know this sounds a weak and timid statement but we are weak and soft to persons we love .It may be our fault .
@mhelsdelacruz (160)
• Philippines
9 Aug 11
I would forgive him but I wont trust anymore the way I trust him before. .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I think this would be the best think for forgiving him with restricted trust . It is very difficult to trust a cheater who we loved with all our heart .
@rhane7315 (5649)
• Philippines
9 Aug 11
it happens on me before on my first boyfriend. i forgive him many times but i'm also human and gets tired of those cheating routine. too bad, he was the one who broke up with me instead of me breaking up of him. but right now, i'm happy with my life because i have a loving, understanding, caring, kind and honest husband and we already have our first born
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
That's great to hear rhane7315.My friend is suffering from the same situation .She is repeatedly chaeted by him and forgives him every time . She believes all his false stories . I will relate your story to her . All the best to you !
@marimarj23 (124)
• Philippines
9 Aug 11
I had been into this kind of situation. My husband, the one I thought would be the least to cheat me, the person I give my trust, love and life. The moment I know it the world was too heavy for me then. Everyday at that time was a struggle, struggle because it is hard to eat, sleep and tears kept on falling. For many days, for many months I live in that kind of life. But as time flies by, you'll get use to it and you will learn to accept everything. That everything in this world is a constant change, the love you promised for a lifetime can be change in a matter of days.
So now, I am already okay and happy. I have moved on already. If one day if my husband will ask for forgiveness. Well, I don't know. Maybe at this time in my life I can forgive him but living together again is very impossible.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
We all learn from such situations and we get stronger day by day .It is sad to hear your condition and how you had to tolerate so much suffering . Hope God helps you and you take the right decision in your life .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
Reactions vary from person to person but some make foolish mistake by trusting the second time and most are cheated again . In few cases conditions improve .
@jdex_143 (1093)
• Philippines
9 Aug 11
This is such a tough decision. If this happens to me, honestly, I don't have an idea what I could do. But I'm certain that whatever reason he has, I won't accept it just for the fact that he cheated already. I will definitely broke up with him and never allow him to contact or even have contact on me. :) Sounds harsh but I think, that's the possible thing I could do. :D
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
You seem to say just the thing I was thinking all thse while . It is utterly difficult to visualize such a situation and think of reactions there off .I think it sounds harsh and strict decision but you are wise enough to say so . I have seen my friend suffering by trusting the man over and over again .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I can understand your situation as my dear friend at present is going through such a situation . She believes all his false stories each time he comes back to her . We friends have failed to help her .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I know how heart wrecking it can be . Actually there can be no justification for cheating and it si always better to move on than stay with someone who is not trustworthy .
@asaivimalarani (6)
• India
8 Aug 11
Hey it is big cheating, when i find i would react silently because he is a cheating how can believe him , i think i really escape from a big problem ,i really thank to god to identify like that person, so every time we should very careful to select our life partner.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
You related things so well . Actually it is good if we can identify such cheators,thnaks be to God . It is no point trusting such men but feeble women ,as my close friend ,prefer giving chances and try their luck . I know it's all in vain .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
That's a cool satement Booyah . I honour your spirit ! good luck :)
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I can see you are very strong and confident in your attitude adhyz82 . I think one cahnce can be given if he/she seeks appology . Choice is always their to leave him/her if he fails to keep his promises .
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
8 Aug 11
I would be absolutely devastated by the whole situation. To find something like that out would be horrible. It would take be a great deal of time to process the whole situation. I feel I would be very open with him about how i felt about him cheating. I know it would hurt me terribly but I would need him to tell me what happened, why he felt he needed to cheat, if I were acting or doing something wrong or not being as attentive to him as I should be. Talking these things out would help me to understand what could have caused him to cheat (there really aren't any excuses for cheating but some circumstances can encourage a spouse or partner to look elsewhere). I would forgive him only once and we would need to be very open and honest to one another. My trust would not at all be the same but I would be willing to give it a go again. If he decided that at that time he wasn't willing to come back then that would be it. He wouldn't have another opportunity to come back later. I'm worth more than that and wouldn't put up with him feeling like he could go and come as he pleases.
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
Thanks Dominique . Your thoughts are justified and rational . We should always do a self study and find pros and cons behind such infidelity and a single chance can always be given . Everyone of us make mistakes , some may be grave while others petty . May be he/she can prove themselves if given a chance .
@rollylolly (2843)
• India
15 Aug 11
I know koperty it is difficult to tolerate such infidelity . But many become weak when they experience such situation themselves . I have seen a friend forgiving her boyfriend repeatedly but I know this should never be encouraged .
