Beyond Stupid

You can't control what your father-in-law does, especially in his own house. However, you can control whether or not your children are exposed to the second-hand smoke. You could sit down and have a talk with him. You can tell him that it is not healthy for the children. Then, he will have to make a decision. If he wants the children to keep coming to his house, then he can choose to smoke outside. Otherwise, you can tell him that he can come to your house to see his grandchildren, but you can also tell him that you will not allow smoking in your house, either, so he will have to smoke outside or wait until after the visit to smoke. I hope that he will realize that what he is doing is unhealthy for his grandchildren and respect that you stood up and are trying to do for them.

Smoking is a very strong addiction and while it is stupid it is very hard to stop. I don't think he should be smoking around others though especially children because second hand smoke can be very harmful to people, and not fair since they are not the ones smoking but could suffer for it in the future anyways. If he wants to smoke he should do it outside or when no one else is in the house.

His smoking is a health risk for everyone nearby him. Does he loves his grandchildren or does he want them to get sick caused of his smoking would be a fatal question to ask him. If he has asthma he is really torturing his own body as well spreading contaminated air around him.

It isn't stupid it is his attempt to justify an unhealthy habit. Narrowing your perception is the easiest way to believe what comes out of your mouth. We have a hard time going against our own sense of right and wrong. When we do something that we know is wrong it is easier to justify it rather than admit the mistake. I've met a lot of smokers that try to overcompensate by making bold statements about there addiction and even trying to laugh it off as if it is some kind of joke. ex. "I'd rather die tomorrow than give up smoking or It's my right to kill myself the way I want to" Some of this may be a stubborn attitude and some may be that they know quitting is harder than justifying their smoking to others. My advice is that the grandkids shouldn't be over there if if he keeps smoking in the house period. If he wants to see them you can find places outside the house or he can smoke outside at least when the kids are there. If he comes over to your house you can make a rule that he needs to smoke outside. Parents get the final say on this matter.