How do you move forward when bad things are happening?
By Dominique25
@Dominique25 (9464)
United States
August 13, 2011 12:00pm CST
I think it is very difficult to see through the hard times when there are so many. Hardships can cloud our judgements, cause us to make or do unwise things. How do you react when you are faced with bad things? Are you more likely to give up? Do you feel that you have the support you need to continue? For me I think focusing on my family really helps me. I want to set a good example for them. Help them to hang in there when times are tough. If they see me falling apart then that doesn't help them. It only causes them to become more anxious about the situation. I want to be an encouragement to them and so I try to work out whatever things are happening. If it's a situation that I really can't control then I just do what I can and not be overwhelmed by it.
1 person likes this
17 responses
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
14 Aug 11
When times get tough, sometimes just remembering the reason why you're doing what you're doing is enough to boost you up for the days to come. Always remember that life isn't all about downs, it's also filled with ups. Just wait for that up time, the time when all your hard work had already paid itself. I guarantee you, you'll feel relieved.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
5 Oct 11
Yep, being positive really helps a lot on different situations.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
5 Oct 11
Yep, being positive really helps a lot on different situations.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree it's a great idea to think and reflect on why we are working for what we are. We have to think about the positive things in order to keep going. It's not always easy to do but we have to remind ourselves of the benefits that we are or will be getting.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
28 Jan 12
Yeah small steps are good. It does make us feel good when we are able to make small steps. Even then it can seem so hard to do something so when we've accomplished even a little bit it helps a great deal. And then eventually we are able to take bigger steps.
@vegegirl (828)
• Australia
14 Aug 11
I do get stressed sometimes through hard times but there are a number of things I can do to help deal with this.. One thing is what you have said - spend time with family and friends as this can help your spirits. I also find exercise helps me deal with things, it makes me feel better or a stronger person which helps me step up to face challenges in a more positive way. Also being involved with hobbies can help and reading, to get my mind off things for a while.
It is great to be able to talk to someone whether it is family, friend or partner as this can also help you, if you can vent your worries. If you don't have someone to listen to you, or you are worried you may have ear bashed you friends too much there is nothing wrong with going to speak to a counsellor sometimes. A counsellor can be good to talk to because they are an outsider and won't be judgemental (hopefully) and won't be affected by what you are going through so they can be more ofjective and you may be able to be more honest with them.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I guess exercising can help us with stress. It can give us the time needed to really think and reflect on things before we make any hasty decisions. If we keep ourselves busy it does help us to take our mind away from our problems. I agree that talking to a counselor would be helpful. As the points you mentioned they can be more objective about situations we face.
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
14 Aug 11
YOU can do this things if you have determination and faith believe that you can do this things with yourself. Only dont forget to ask Gods help. Pray to Him always and stand firm and strong especially in front of your love ones like your parents or children. Most especially if they are getting strength from you.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
Thanks. I agree that it is important for us to be strong when it comes to being involved with our children. We want them to be strong and to have a strong personal relationship with God. They learn from us so we need to set a good example.
@starrose_ara (784)
• Philippines
14 Aug 11
Sometimes you react differently when certain situations happen in your life. In some ways I act maturely and take it with a bit of sadness but a reminder to myself that things will not remain the same and it will be better. Even If I don't understand the circumstances that I faced, when I look down the road I realized that it has helped me to grow as a person. Thanks God that He is around and that He has place people in my path that have helped me.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree with you that with different trials we act differently. When it comes to one thing we may be mature about the whole situation and in others we may act childish wanting to get our way. When we endure our trials it does help us to be stronger and to face the others that will surely come.
@nubbu123 (24)
• India
14 Aug 11
I would tell you one thing bad and good movements these are the tastes of the life. If some thing happening band in life or with your life really you are getting some experience from it, My friend these bad consequences actually teaches us that how to become strong and give the power to fight against of it.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree with you that we can learn a lot from the things that we are facing. Each trial we can learn from. So we have to hang in there and try and see what we can learn from them.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree we have to accept reality as it is. When we let myths and unrealistities crowd our thinking it only makes things worse. We have to openly admit what things are happening. A lot of the time no matter how hard we would like to change something we just can't. So we have to work with what we have and move from there.
@flpoolbum (2978)
• United States
14 Aug 11
I am a "manic/depressive", so this is a major challenge every day of my life. I also recently found out that my brain is shrinking, but they can not find out why. Now, it is also a matter of how much time that I have left. This has made me even more depressed and causes a great deal of addition stress in my life.
As far as the length of my life is concerned, I find a line from the Rob Thomas song, "Someday" really encouraging and motivational. The line is, that I'm "Gonna live my life outloud"! To me, that means that I should take advantage of what time I do have and do as much as I can. Of course, I also have medication for the manic/depressive disorder.
I also like to watch a lot of situation comedies on TV and funny movies. Reading the comics in the newspaper is also helpful for me, too.
As far as family goes, I was never close to my siblings and I recently separated from my wife. In part, I think, because she wanted us to move back to Indiana where her children (and our grandchildren) are. She says she will have more help from her family there. I can not stand living in Indiana (I live in Florida) and I don't really have a relationship with her children. They do their thing and I do mine. Besides, my wife suffered as she watched her Mother go through Alzheimer's and eventually die. Part of me thinks that I told her to leave because I didn't want her to suffer through that again. I have been a loner most of my life and am comfortable with it. I have never really gotten to the point where I can trust many people.
If anyone is interested, feel free to check out my blog, "My Life in the Spin Cycle" at floridapoolbum.blogspot.com. I have always enjoyed writing and have written about a number of things, including my medical condition. Writing is a great source of pleasure for me.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
You do have a lot going on. I can understand why at times you get discouraged and depressed. I think it is important that we do the things that we love while we can. And not to be so overly concerned about others and what they are doing. I think that is where I need to work on a lot. I hope that perhaps things can work out with you and your wife. But you seem to be doing ok as far as you being use to be a loner. I also hope that the doctors can figure out what is going on but until then you enjoy your life and find happiness in doing what you love.
@dodo19 (47317)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
14 Aug 11
It is true that sometimes it can be difficult to move forward through the hard times. But sometimes it's something that just feel good when we are able to achieve it. It is something that is very possible to do. There is always a way to get pass the hard and difficult times.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree that if we keep the right mindset we can get through very difficult times. And when we do we feel awhole lot better. I think that for me I've faced so many different things and now awhole new set of trials have come upon me. At times I feel like I can get through them and then other days i feel like i'm not going to make it. But I will keep working at it, and especially my attitude towards trials because that does have a huge effect on how we view things.
@_sketch_ (5742)
• United States
14 Aug 11
Just keep on doing what you must and try not to worry because that solves nothing. The only direction there is to go is forward, so you got to just keep going on.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree wholeheartedly with you that there really is no good in worrying. It doesn't get us anywhere. I tend to worry a lot about the future and how things will play out in my life. But these are things that I don't really have control over, things can happen and change drastically. And it is often said that we worry a lot about things that perhaps will not happen to us.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree that praying to Jehovah God and asking him for strength and a portion of his holy spirit is essential. He is the only one that we can rely on with everything. He will never let us down or disappoint us. He's the only one that can give us everlasting life so when we are facing difficult times it's important for us to approach him first. He will help us with what we are facing.
@jafburns (48)
• India
14 Aug 11
its really difficult to tackle hard times. but if you have support from your family half the problem is over. this is what i felt. and if you come across such a situation you are a good example not just for your family but to all you near and dear ones including your friends. be bold and keep smiling whatever happens. crying a lot helps you but do not cry in front of your parents because that hurts them a lot. the best way is to meet your best friend with whom you can share your problems. cry on their shoulders. it helps you a lot and reduces your burden. above all be bold in front of those people who made you cry. dont let them feel that you are weak and they have succeeded in hurting you. there are people who find pleasure in others sadness. dont let such people enjoy.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I do agree that it makes a world of difference when we have support from family and friends. It is wonderful when we have sincere friends that we can open up to and talk about our problems. It brings a great deal of relief knowing that we have people who are willing to help.
@flowerfest08 (1677)
•
14 Aug 11
hi:)
It's really difficult if you are in a middle of hardships, but me what I do is I just pray and get the support of my family and friends, I know with them beside me all will ends well. what you also doing is a great thing because instead of giving up you even try to give strength to your family.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree that it's a good thing to pray. That is very important. It really helps us to have the right view of our trials and be able to strive to endure what we are going through.
@cindy12 (88)
• China
14 Aug 11
We need to be strong and independence even on the hard days.
I lost my love and my job last month.Now I am still live and happy because there are lots of reasons for me to have a good life.I am sad for the past things, but I know "LET BYGONES BY BYGONES","LIFE CONTINUES WITHIN YOU OR WITHOUT YOU".
The lost things are not doomed to be not yours, so you need to move on by yourself.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree it's up to us to move on. We can't allow ourselves to be stuck in a rut. We need to continue to find happiness in our life and depend only own ourself for happiness. We can't expect others to make us happiness because we will be sadly disappointed. And like you mentioned life continues to move forward whether we are happy or not. Time continues to move forward. So we need to make the most of our situation and circumstances.
@jugsjugs (12967)
•
14 Aug 11
I do feel that it can be really hard sometimes to try to move on, but the way i see things are, is that life is too short to be angry or upset.I am a person that tends to never give up, not unless i know that what ever it is has beat me.I think that there are a lot of people out there that tend to chuck in the towel so to speak as soon as they think that they can not go forward in things, like life itself.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
The way you look at things is good. We need to remember that life is very short. And we can not get back lost time. So like you mentioned it doesn't make since to be angry or spend our time always being upset. Even when we are justifiably upset and angry it really doesn't get us anywhere. We need to strive to continue to move forward and do things that we enjoy in life.
@hushi22 (4928)
•
13 Aug 11
a lot of people know me as a non-quitter.
i dont easily give up even if a lot of bad things happen so what i do is i strive harder. if i am so down then i seek help and comfort from my love ones like my mom especially. she is very much reliable in giving me comfort and strength.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
That is a good thing. It is really wonderful when we have those that we love and who are dear to us help us. It makes a great difference to know that we have support and encouragement. We work harder when we know that others believe in what we are trying to do or accomplish.
@koperty3 (1876)
•
13 Aug 11
Problem with my character is that I never give up no matter what. I'm very stubborn person. Few years ago I had accident. I became disable. My life changed. New situation. I was very depressed on the beginning. I asked myself why and why me. But I move on with my life. I support other people. I try to help as I can. I try to support my family and friends. They know that I will never give up. No matter how difficult the situation is.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Sep 11
It is a very good thing for us to continue to hang in there and to work hard. When we work hard to help and care for others it really takes us away from our problems and the things we are facing. We can see that at times others have it worse than we do. We should always strive to never give up.