what to say to your child when they ask about their dad
By mrb022385
@mrb022385 (1)
August 14, 2011 10:13pm CST
I am just wondering if there are any other moms out there that feel like you are the mother and father in your childs life so you feel that telling your child about their father is a litlle unfair. I have a 2 year old and she always calls me her mommy and daddy but sometimes she asks where her daddy is. He is currently in jail so I dont want to tell her that so I tell her he is off working somewhere and she will get to see him someday. When really I want to say your dad is a piece of crap so dont worry about him because you will never see him!! I just wonder where have all the good guys gone?
3 people like this
12 responses
@Jlyn10 (11966)
• Malaysia
16 Aug 11
Hi mrb
I'm like you, a mom and dad to my son since his birth. Now he is already 11 years old and he has not even seen his dad. I just told him the truth, because I believe I should not hide anything from him. Anyway, your kid is still too small to understand even if you tell her now. But you would have to prepare for that day when she is mature enough to want to know the truth. Yup, it makes me wonder too sometimes where all the good guys have gone to. 
@samar54 (2454)
• Egypt
16 Feb 12
You did the right thing by saying the truth to your son that he will be known one day.. I am with you in that she must tell her daughter the truth when she get older and can understand it, there is no other solution
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
you should tell her the truth,except from the "piece of crap", you should always be honest to her.Tell her the reason why her daddy's not coming back.because if you tell her a lie,and when she grow up and found out that her daddy is in jail,she will blame you for the rest of her life.
@brew2x (3094)
• Philippines
17 Aug 11
I am sorry to hear that. What you've told your children about their dad is a good one. Don't tell them about the truth not until they are old enough to understand. It is important that kids grow up happy, without any worries in mind and with a positive view about life.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
16 Feb 12
HI Mrb0
I'm sorry for your situation. It's tough to know what to say at that age. I am not for lying to kids but at 2, she is so young and would not understand what jail is. In a way, it is the truth...he IS working...hopefully on his life. How long is he in for? What is he in for? Is it true that she will NEVER see him? There are good guys out there. There really are but women tend to put up with crap which gives guys the impression that it's ok. Some of the nice guys feel that they are too nice and get rejected for the bad boys. Why? because they do.
1 person likes this
@Cherizette (76)
• Guyana
15 Aug 11
Sorry to hear you have to go through this.
Just keep telling your child that daddy will be home soon.
Children are like a clean piece of paper, so you have to be careful what you write on it.
Don't taint his/her mind. Maybe her father is crap now but who know what tomorrow holds.
My kids haven't seen their dad in more than a year. He's brokes and unemployed.
I don't tell them that. I tell them soon your dad will come and everything is going to be okay.
@MissUnperfect (18)
• United States
15 Aug 11
i have a 2 yr old myself and his daddy has never been there for him and i just tell my son the truth..that daddy left and isnt coming back. well i am in a relationship and the guy that i am with treats my son like his child, and my son calls him daddy..the best thing is to just tell your child the truth, the more u say lies the worst its gonna get for the child for when he/she gets older.
1 person likes this
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Before when i was a kid I used to asked my mom about my dad and she just gave me an answer of I don't know.. but then when I grown up and finally realizing that I've been living on life without father and I finally understood that.. but as for you, maybe just give it a little more time for your kids to understand about jail and other stuff, but always remember do not tell lies to your kids that can result to confusion, somehow it will affect on how they will accept the truth..:)
@chrystaltears (3392)
• United States
20 Feb 12
I guess it doesn't hurt to tell them something like that when they are real little. You just have to be able to tell them the truth later on before they get out and some mean parent gets a kick out of getting their innocent child to go and tell your child the truth. You have to kind of ease it in there to where they won't feel so bad about their dad and about themselves.
@Hazelrose (2179)
• Philippines
21 Feb 12
Hello mrbO22385,Sorry to hear that.But for me it is better to tell the truth.Time will come he will know it from others. you cant really hide that situation forever,or else you will be blame for not telling the truth.
@juggal0Xx420 (509)
• United States
20 Feb 12
i dont know the answer for this one i was actually gonna be with this pregnant girl where i live and help take care of her and get her what she needed but apparently she doesn't a relationship so i told her it was understandable and i didn't say anything about with relationship with her afterwards but we are still good friends and told her if she needs anything i am always here
