When Kids Attack, Will you get angry??

@pbbbsra (1214)
Philippines
August 14, 2011 10:51pm CST
Today we have some of our relatives who came over for a visit. As like always I prepared food and made sure the house is perfect for my visitors. They came for afternoon tea and I didn't know that the crowd will have 8 kids and four adults. The kids started to run around the house, they came inside rooms and jumped on beds. My guests who were were actually my husband's aunt and her daughter and sons told me not to worry because the kids won't touch anything. As a respect to my guest I acted like everything is fine. The kids then went out to the living room where we are drinkig tea. They were playing all around and then one bumped on her mom and dropped the cup of tea over my white sofa. I felt like hit water was poured over my head, but I have to be calm. Then aunt told me, "You chose the wrong color for your living room, see its diffucult to clean." I thought I deserve an appology but what I got was an insult. As much as I wanted to clean the mess right away because I know it will stain, I can't. While I am still getting over the tea drop, we heard pieces of glass broken... and this time I feel like a volcano about to explode! They broke my crystal lamp which was a gift we got from a friend at Vienna. Then the aunt told me again, "Your house is not kid friendly, you don't know how to choose decors, u have a lot of crysrals all over the house especiay in the living room and it is not good for kids. U also choose white in most of your items and it is not child friendly either." I felt lime having the worst day of my life! My sofa was stained, my lamp was broken, the bedrooms are a mess, and instead of appology I was said to be out of taste. I want to answer but did not want to break my respect to my guests. I dont have kids yet and now I am still enjoying decorating my house. I love classic designs and I go crazy over crystals. I dont design my house for other people to like, it is for myself that I love to keep our as like me and my husband like. I was mad at that time. We say kids are kids... but the it was too much. If I have a child like those I would tell them to stop or might as well not bring them with me at all. Again it l ended up without saying anything, I wasnt even said sorry for the damage. If you were me will u get angry? How do you deal with your visitor's kids who turn the house upide down?
4 people like this
10 responses
@poru78 (24)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
Ahahaha! I understand how you feel pbbbsra, because I have a niece that's also very hypher. Always running, and picking up things around. xD. I remember one time, when my niece accidentally pour a glass of water all over her grandmother's bed. Ahahaha, she was not allowed in the room for almost a week. My advice to you, just relax, and breathe in. Maybe someday, when you have a child of your own, and I know this by experience, 'kids will be kids', you might want to make a visit to your husband's aunt. xD
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
At least your niece poured water, it will dry. I am still in the process of getting rid of that stain on my sofa. I have been making excuses lately for visitors, I just don't want a sight of those kids yet for a while. My husband told me he won't let anything like that happen again, but I don't know. I also know when I have my own kids, I will not raise them like that.
2 people like this
@bnpraveen (172)
• India
15 Aug 11
hai pbbbsra just i gone through your discussion, really i came to know that, you are so polite and calm going, you got good taste like selecting crystals, white colour, these show your taste, you really enjoy decorating always this shows your sense of cleanliness,mean while you have to respond to others in correct way at correct time, sorry to say your aunt behaved rudely with you,instead of apolozy she said that your house is not friendly to kid environment, and you got bad taste and those stuff, you know what she was just escaping from the damage by saying you got bad taste, i need to say it is totally your fault you have to react on them , once you react correctly sure children wont repeat the same. becaue they are childrens they dont know how to behave in neighbours home, being a neighbour you have to take intial step before damage occur,any way dont repeat the same when your aunt comes with children next time,react in on-time okay have a great day my friend.
2 people like this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I love crystals, I have them all over the house, and i love white because it looks clean and relaxing. They require a lot of cleaning, but it's all worth it. I don't have kids yet, and I know when our kids arrive, I will have to change somethings in the house, but for now, I love to decorate. I know If I reacted or said something, it will fall back on me and they will say I am disrespectful.
2 people like this
@thetis74 (1525)
15 Aug 11
Like you said kids are kids. I won't get mad with the kids because they are just being kids. But I don't think all kids are like that when they are disciplined by parents to behave well when they are in some other people's house. That was a very nasty aunt you got there. Even if your house isn't kid friendly it wasn't intended for their kids or for them because it is your house and not theirs. I won't get mad with the kids. I would get mad with the people who take them to my house and break things and not being to stop what they are doing. You did deserve and apology. I am really wondering if that is what their kids do in their own homes. But I bet it is because they won't behave like that if they were not used to it. And it would be unthinkable if they tolerate that behavior. And now I wonder how they live with it. I have a four-year old daughter and I always remind her to behave well when we visit others. And she listens to that. The problem is not the kids. It was the parents fault why their kids are like that.
2 people like this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
You cannot imagine how they are when they are at home. They are worse and you can't put them in just one place. They say just let them be. I know I don't have kids yet, but in the future when I have kids, I won't let them grow like that. If I know they won't behave well, then I'd rather not bring them with me.
2 people like this
@keihimekawa (2009)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I'd definitely get angry! Especially when they blame me for something not my fault. Family members are the most difficult people to deal with... We had the same experience. My mom went bonkers and I'm on the verge of hanging my nieces and nephews upside down when they "accidentally" dropped my office laptop T_T It's amazing that family members, especially the adult ones, tend to be so inconsiderate of their fellow family members. When they go to their friends' house and did something terrible, they'll immediately apologize but when it's in another family member's house, it's a whole 180 turn. It would also depend on the kid's upbrining. Three or two of my nieces aren't as boisterous as the other ones. The do play with them but they restrain themselves. When my nieces and nephews came by for another visit, I prepare a mountain load of cartoon movies and series for them to watch :P That'll keep them busy and settled while we prepare for what might happen the next few hours.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I tried doing that too before, I played them a movie and let them to play my husband's playstation, when they were about the leave, I saw all cables everywhere, and that was the last time the playstation worked too.
2 people like this
@pibi713 (187)
• China
15 Aug 11
It would drive me crazy if the kids ruin my house like that. You are very nice and you weren't angry with them. Your aunt and her sons and daughters are so impolite, they didn't give their children a good family education. Be carefully the next time when they bring the kids to your house again.
2 people like this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I was angry, but I can't do anything. My husband freaked out also when he got home and told him about what happened. There was also one time when the kids broke his playstation so he's not that close to them either.
2 people like this
• India
15 Aug 11
After reading your long story, it is good on the part of your response even kids made noise to you. We can not say anything because as relatives they come. We also respect them as guests. We feel that guests should not be insulted.
2 people like this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
Yes, my story was a bit long, I wanted to put everything in detail. I agree I don't have any other choice but just keep quiet. I still can't get over my broken lamp, but I can't get it back as well.
2 people like this
@pinklilly (3443)
• Australia
15 Aug 11
OMG How rude and disrespectful... You are correct you should design your home to your tastes.. You don't have children so it is expected that you would not have a child friendly home... I have 3 children the youngest of which is only a baby not on the move yet... Firstly if that were my children I would be furios, that is no way to act.. Play outside.. I really don't know how you bit your tounge on that I thgink I would have spoken up.. I would be mega pissed.. I would have cleaned up that tea right away and if I was the parent of the child I would have apoligied prefusly and help clean it up... I would have asked them to play outside or otherwise put a movie on and they would have to sit quietly and watch.... It is hard to have lots of children running about it is much better for them to be outside... Aawww I really do feel for you. You wouldn't want any children after that ordeal...
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I love kids too, but as you said after seeing those we somehow fear having kids too. I was telling my husband how I felt and everybody knows I am very sensitive when it comes to my things... but then kids are kids, what can I do. The damage is done. I am sad but I feel far from the kids, they act the same way every time they come over.
3 people like this
@finlander60 (1804)
• United States
15 Aug 11
I will TRY to be as nice as I can in this response. My first suggestion to you would be to take your husband aside and tell him how you feel about those children. Then I would tell him that HE IS GOING TO TAKE CARE OF THIS PROBLEM. My response to the ADULTS? would be to inform them that, while they may be welcome in my home, until their children are BETTER BEHAVED, THEY ARE NOT WELCOME.
1 person likes this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
My husband love kids and those children taught him to hate kids... He also don't like then coming over. But they come over when he is not home. He did talked with his aunt about the kids when they broke the playstation. But by doing that, we were at the family gazette the next day. They gossip was my husband is very disrespectful and rude.
2 people like this
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
22 Aug 11
This is my two cents here, first off, you cannot blame the children, they are innocent in their own right. I know, because I have two myself. They do get into things all the time. Now, that said, let me say this. The children are a product of their parents to a point. Meaning, if they do not reprimand them at home, they are apt not to do it in some one else's home. Your company should not have accepted an invitation to come to your house is they knew that their kids would do something like that. Also, you and your husband have the right to decorate your home as you see fit, after all, it is yours. I agree with you that when the child knocked the tea over and broke the lamp, you aunt, or who ever, should have apologized to you and your husband and offered to help clean the sofa and offer to replace the lamp. Then they should have gotten their children and punished them and left. You have every right to be angry, but not at the children. Be angry at the adults for letting it happen. One more thing, instead of you feeling like you had to keep the peace, you should have jumped up and went to clean your white sofa and after that nasty remark, you had the right to say something. Same goes for the broken lamp. Now, if I were you, I would not invite them ever again.
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
hello pbbbsra, I have a nieces and nephews ages 7 and below We have simple rules don't mess up someone's place It's all about how you discipline the kids I don't want to judge your visitors but it seems they totally a rude and disrespectful one I mean the kids ruined the house and yet she was able to comment like that instead of apologizing to you. I've been on that situation but not to the point that they broke something I let their guardians feel that this is my place you are my guest please be considerate and sensitive. Happy mylotting
2 people like this
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
15 Aug 11
I also tried to make them feel that I was hurt by the damage. I hoped they could've just broken a glass or a simple vase... but they broke something very valuable and a bit expensive. And I ended up being at fault...
2 people like this