how quick do you forgive your partner when he does something that angered you?

I used to stay annoyed at my partner if we had a disagreement for quite some time, sometimes for an entire day. But I guess as I have grown older and we have lived longer together, there is naturally more give and take in our relationship. I have learned that we all have different ways, and that in a new relationship there is bound to be clashes as we move closer together, but they get sorted out. Forgiveness is important, but we have to come to it in our own time. First of all we have to be willing to forgive and then just wait patiently for it to happen within us. This way, we become more peaceful and live in better harmony within our own worlds. _Derek

I once was stuck in a relationship. At that time I was angry, I was hurting. There was nothing could do but to put the relationship to an end.

hi dear, i think with my hubby, we often have arguments and fights but then in two hours or six hours but mainly the same day we cool down and start talking to each other. i think it is different with different relations like, with someone different or other than my hubby, if i feel i am done, then i am done hundred percent, for sure. i will never see the other person's face ever in my life. i will infact make him remember me because i am such that i can hurt someone if i am hurt. so better be away. i cannot take too much of sh*t from anyone unnecessarily. i do not even believe in any quick fix problem. once a line comes in any relation, its like a line in glass, what so ever you do, paint, polish, cover, whatever, line will always be there. so better finish it up . i do not believe in dragging relationships. if it is over, it is over. you go your way, i will go mine, finish. when we cannot see eye to eye, we cannot live together, we should separate healthily .

Well this is a tough one. First I would have to weigh what he has done to piss me off. I then look at the length of time we have been together. I have not had a problem forgiving my guy because his transgressions are usually minor. However, one thing that took weeks to get over was how he handles his kid and ex wife issues. He is so passive that I feel they get away with things. This is the one thing that makes me feel like I can't continue in the relationship. I get over it till the next stunt. We have been together almost 11 yrs so walking away is not easy.

I can understand. Sometimes, it does just happen that you do feel this way. Sometimes, I find that there are things that I have a difficult time forgiving and forgetting. Some things are easier to forgive. I think that it really depends on what my husband did, but it doesn't usually last more than a day or two, or something like that. I think that it may not be a bad idea to see if you can't try to talk to him about it. Now, I don't know if it's going to make a difference, or help the both of you, but at least, it might help you get a bit of a clearer picture.

I know you love the guy because it's true when they say that "if it doesn't hurt, it isn't love" but you need to love yourself too. If you're in a position that's threatening you're over-all well-being then you must let it go. You are right. You're done with him but always remember to forgive the person who hurt you... so you can move on.

i cannot say anything about your situation because it seems like a private matter for both of you. as to the question, it depends on the gravity of the wrongdoing. if it is about womanizing, then i may resort to doing something that is contrary to forgiving. no, i won't kill or hurt, but i will do things legally. this is just me speaking and i am just thinking overboard.

Yes some time he annoys me but it's not something that i will not be able to forgive him because i annoy him sometimes too. I would say that i am done with him if there's no connection anymore sometimes love is just ain't enough.

i find it hard to forgive and forget. i don't know why. but then if my partner or whoever it is that i have been angry at. if they should talk to me and clear their sides, i may understand and forgive them. but then what's done is done and you can't change the fact that they have done wrong. but then i try to figure things out and give them chance. if it happens again, it should be dealt with.

For me, A sincere sorry is ok. I always find forgiveness in my heart. So forgive him if he asked to be forgiven.

Hi chiyosan! I've experienced that so many times already that really making me sick. I really hate when he lied to me and that's what he did. I do have lot of patience in myself every time he did that I just forgive. But it seems he is so abusive now. And this time it so hard for me to forgive him. What he did is so unpardonable, and I'm planning now to quit with him. I can't bear it already. Just be yourself girl. I know you can do it also. God Bless You always..Happy Mylotting!!!! :-)))))

Many a times i also get landed in such situations and i decide that I will not talk to my husband any more but my husband is so much talkative that he doesn't minds what happened and continue to talk even I try to ignore him but i can't and within 15minutes the situation comes back to normal and i feel that nothing happened. And so i forget all my anger.

first of all, the scenario that you've presented is quite vague. what did he do that annoyed you that much?was this something unforgivable?does it happen all the time? another thing is, if this annoying thing is habitual, did you ever tell him it pisses you off pretty much?if yes, then tell him for the very last time that you don't want that kind of thing to happen and tell him exactly how you feel about it. expressing your frustration over it might help him understand where you're coming from.sometimes if we just keep our feelings it really blows up big time if we feel like we've had enough. that's why it's best that we talk things over while we can still fix it and be transparent on what we want in a relationship so it won't reach to the point wherein we wanna give up.another suggestion, try to calm down. it's not advisable to make major decisions when you're emotions are dominating you cause you might regret it when you're feeling okay.

I am sorry that I am finding your post a tad amusing. We are the same in some ways. I really get so frustrated when he annoyed me so much. Depending on how aggravated I am it sometimes last weeks when i feel that what he did is so over the top. Other times, its just hours that he needs to count to be forgiven. I guess the most important thing is whether or not he is asking for your forgiveness.

Only you will know when you are really done. No matter how much your family or friends tell you not to do it anymore, you aren't done till you are done. I know from experience. I lived with a man for 12 years and he pissed me off lots. The first 5 years we were together was great but then he turned really possesive after we moved to another province 14 hours away from everyone we knew. He got jealous over everyone and everything. I didn't do anything to make him jealous, he was jealous all along but hid it from me. I complained about him to my family a little too much and they all kept telling me to leave him but I couldn't till I was done, till I had enough. It took a lot of years that I now feel like I waisted but I can't look at it that way now. I am 54 years old and starting all over alone. It is hard but it is worth it. I may never be able to retire but at least I don't have to put up with crap anymore. I commend you to try to make it work and I wish you luck because I know it's hard but you will come to the right decission for you when you are ready...... Cheers and have a nice day my friend, Chris

usually it only takes a kiss when she got angry with me. and sometimes, a quarrel will only lead us to the darkest place of the room to settle the issue. it's just a matter of talking with our bodies without words coming out of our mouths.

Hi chiyosan! I completely understand how you feel. I've been on that situation before. Now what I did during that time is not talk to him for the whole day. I want my anger to subside before talking to him. Afterwards, I will talk to him and clear things out. He will ask forgiveness and I will accept it. I made mistakes in the past and I know he's very willing to accept me back. So try to talk to him after some time to settle things.

I can forgive easy, well it depends on what he did to me, our worst argument was because he didn't want that I tell his friends that we are legally married, because he wanted that when we celebrate the ceremony that is going to b e next year, noy body know that we are legally married. But somebody asked me after ask him, and because I didn't that that person have asked before me, to him, I said the true even thought we were d accord in to say that we aren't married and we will get married next year. He was as angry that he said there was not point in to celebrate any wedding now that everybody know that we are married. He mades me cry, but he knows me and knows that for me is very difficult to lie. So he forgave me asked me to forgive him. It tooks a day for me to foregive him. But now is done. So please forgive him.

I completely feel your pain and annoyance! I've been there many times and it's just unbearable. I do forgive eventually. It really depends on what he did, if it's unforgivable then I would just let him go. Unfortunately, the longest I've ever been pissed off for was a week and I ignored all his calls and texts. When you're pissed off, everything he says or does is just more annoying! :( I hope you feel better.