What are the rights of in laws over you own child?

It is the parents' right to have their child disciplined. The in-laws are just there, to at least guide them, but not impose them of what to do with their kid. Maybe, when the in-laws see that the parents are seeing that the parents are teaching the child bad attitudes and ways, then they can intervene to do what should be done to protect the child. When the kid's parents are in conflict with the in-laws, i think it would also be advisable to keep the child from the in-laws, because they might feed the child with concerns that might confuse their young minds.

They don’t really have any right.. but that’s the same as your parents don’t have any right either. What you have to remember is, while you don’t really want your in-laws, having much control or say over your child, but you are fine with your parents having control or say, the in-laws are your husbands parents, and maybe he wants them to have a say, wheras he doesn’t want the inlaws having a say, and the in-laws are YOUR parents then? If you get what I mean? .. it’s hard, because the in-laws aren’t your family, and you may feel pushed out and controlled by them etc.. but you have to remember, that while your husbands family are YOUR in-laws, YOUR family, is his in-laws and he may feel exactly the same?

Hi Jenith, Well, as a parent myself, I understand somewhat where you are coming from. My mother was a bit over-bearing when I first became a mother. I had to actually put my foot down and set some boundaries for her. And yes, she did sometimes interfere in my marriage. As for keeping my kids from her...I never tried that one. My kids loved her and loved spending time with her. It would have been hurtful to the kids to deny them their grandparents. Kids NEED the grandparents too. I don't know what the laws are in the Phillipines but here in the US, the grandparents have legal rights to see the grandchildren unless they are abusive then you can't keep them from visiting. If you really don't get along with the inlaws, you could set up something where they get to take the kids for a day to spend time with them. I am now a Grandmother and I may be a little more lenient with them than the parents are or even than I was with my own children but I would never really go against the wishes of the parents. For example, my grandson knows that when he is at my house, I'll let him stay up a little later than he normally can. I know his parents don't allow him to have soda though so NO I will not buy him soda. I don't think the grandparents have the right to completely go against the parents wishes.

As parents you're responsible for the well-being of your child. Until the child reaches legal age, that gives you the right to decide who they can and can't see. The younger they are the easier this is. Unless the parents are in some way neglectful, then the in-laws have no right to demand to see the child. And, even then they would have to come up with something stronger than. "Well he/she's my relitive I should be able to see him/her. If you're being a good parent, then you deem the right to say that your kid can't see certain people. Of course you do have to have justifiable cause. And, if you're not on good terms you can justify this by having the feeling that the in-laws may do more harm to your child then good. But, whining and using the blood excuse doesn't cut it in a court of law.

As the mother and father of the child a serious discussion needs to take place with the grandparents. The grandparents seem to be a bit over bearing but ultimately it is what the parents say. Of course with all due respect the grandparents surely need to realize that it is the parents last word and say so for the child. There are grandparents that will not listen no matter what but with continual, respectful discussions a mutual agreement needs to take place. It would be a shame to move away from the grandparents and they miss out on their grandchilds life so best that all have a caring and understanding discussion about how things need to be.

hi:) yes you're right for what I know grand parents spoil the kids my grandparents did it and I bet so did yours and I think they also have the rights to see the child but what they can do is set their boundaries because they are their kids so they have to set the rules, It may hurt a little feelings at the time but that's the way it should be.

Hi Jenith, I am also a Filipina like you and the theme of your discussion is nothing new to me. When I got married 24 years ago, I also had that dilemma where I am basically the in-law in their house. Well, for one thing I am not a person you can just command to do anything against my will. Of course I know when I am wrong, I do easily admit that but when they are in the wrong insisting that I do what they want, I won't hesitate to contradict them. My view is that, for as long as I haven't done anything wrong or out of the norm, I will never concede to anyone's dictates especially in matters of rearing my own children and that I particularly know that they are the ones with the wrong ideas. Fortunately, my husband is also not someone you can order around. It's a good thing I know how to keep my wits and I have stood my ground many times against their will. I wouldn't say it's to antagonize them but it's just a way to tell them to let me have my own way as I am not a dumb person in the first place and I also have my limits. There is nothing wrong in advising children in-laws but it is up to the daughter or the son in-law to heed the advice, anyway, they should be given the right to live their own lives as when they got married, they are supposed to leave their own families to be with their spouses just as you said it. This is explicitly written in the Holy Bible. It was really hard at the start but when they know you had your mind exclusively set on those things, they will surely leave you alone or you can leave them. Of course, you know what I mean. You don't need to suffer being with them when you have the choice to live by your own. If the husband is not as willing to leave his family, he shouldn't have married at all. There are no laws restricting a married couple to live on their own. They should in fact live by their own as soon they got married. The grandparents are best in giving advices but I don't think they have the right to restrict your moves and certainly, they have no right to tell you what to do nor state for that matter that you cannot keep them away from their grandchildren. It is up to the parents to decide what is good for their children. For so many years, my mother in-law and I are in very good terms and our mother-daughter in-law relationship is what you can call exceptional because she listens first to my ideas everytime and before she even gives any advice, she would wait for me to ask her first. I understand her in the same way she understands me. That's better than any other. If my mother is still around, I am sure she will agree with me. Have a nice day! :)