Do you call your kids silly names, that arent harmful just playful? Bad MoM?
@modernchick000 (4)
United States
August 31, 2011 2:52pm CST
My Mom and I are quite differant in my opinion my mom has a hard time taking a joke and seems to be stuck in the 50's, I am 27 and she is 60... Today I was at her house and my 2 year old son was lying on the floor ( I asked him in a playful manner) "what ya doin on the floor" he smiled and then i said " you so strange boy" (yet again just being playful). My mom then looks at me and says all rude like " why are you calling him strange he is not strange" Then I guess I got slightly offened and I said that i was just playing with him and then she says " That's not playing" and then I said " well sometimes I even call him my litte terd.." then she got upset and said "that she does not like that and that is not nice and then she asked me if she ever called me anything like that, the answer is yes but i didnt care to go there so i didnt i just said I didnt remember but I told her I dont take things literal. there was another incident you see me and my husband play this little game with my son, he does a happy face when asked and he does this cute mad face when asked he lowers his eye brows and does this cute pouty face... she told my husband that we should be teaching him that and that she fusses at him for doing it. To my knowledge he only does this when playing I am a stay at home mom and when hes mad he doesnt do a pouty face he throws himself on the floor so to my knowledge the "mad face is just our game" I know this all seems trival but she makes me feel like I am a bad parent but when I step back and look at it it really doesnt feel like I am doing anything wrong but I wanna know am I doing anything wrong parent to parent???
3 responses
@la_chique (1498)
•
31 Aug 11
Seems like your mom is sticking up for her grandson a little too much ;)
Its cute that you use silly little names for him. He'll remember those in a fond way when he's bigger. I dont see any harm in it at all. As long as you dont say it in a bullying way, then its just affectionate. My own mom used to call me her little sausage, and introduce me and my brother as her little potatoes, but I never felt bad about that. I love thinking about the silly little things my mom used to call us when we were little.
Now I'm an adult, my partner even does it. I get so obsessed about my weight that he calls me fatty, but he only does is jokingly. He doesnt say 'oh you're really fat and I think you need to stop eating before I get another skinnier model'. If it was the latter, I wouldnt be with him! Maybe your mom just isnt used to the modern way of interaction.
@modernchick000 (4)
• United States
31 Aug 11
Yea not use of it would be mild my mom doesnt keep up with the at all which was one of my main strugles growing up with her lol... well at least I will be able to be kool with my son, I never wanna hurt him I just want a stronger bond then me and mom had..
@MomofLucas (50)
• United States
1 Sep 11
Your not a bad parent. My mom does the same thing. I always call my 3 year old "a little rat" when he does something sneaky. Of course he's 3 so his sneaky is holding something, like a cookie, behind his back before he ask if he can have one. My mom heard he call him rat one day and was horrified. To my son its a game, he's trying to be sneaky and I catch him by calling him rat. He knows he's been caught when I say it and he always ask "mom how do you know?" In my mind and I believe in my son's mind I'm not putting him down, its just a silly name. But my mom thinks that I'm being mean by calling him that.
I also tell him he's strange when he does something strange, and he's response (because I've taught him) is "its good to be strange." My mom also has a problem with this.
I think the difference is age, and the type of parent I am to my son versus the type of parent she was to me and my siblings. I too am a stay-at-home mom and so I spend alot of time with my son. He can tell by the tone of my voice whether I'm joking or mad. My mom worked alot, sometimes 2 jobs (which I admire her for) but that meant that our interaction was limited. Because of that we didn't have the same bond that I have with my son. I don't think she would have called me anything like these silly names because she wouldn't be sure of what my reaction to it would be. But I know my son, I know it doesn't upset him.
@whengcat (1457)
• Philippines
1 Sep 11
Hi modernchick,
Well I guess that's how our oldies' way of thinking, just be more understanding. I think they are just not used in hearing those kinds of talking as in their time it was more of a conservative and serious life
Yeah, I call my kids "names" too and it's nothing serious except when I'm mad For example, my daughter is somewhat skinny and it's "payat" in our language, so I call her playfully as "yatot" and on the contrary, my son is chubby or fat, but not that fat, it's called "mataba" so I call him "taba" or "tabachoy"
Yeah, I call my kids "names" too and it's nothing serious except when I'm mad For example, my daughter is somewhat skinny and it's "payat" in our language, so I call her playfully as "yatot" and on the contrary, my son is chubby or fat, but not that fat, it's called "mataba" so I call him "taba" or "tabachoy"