Autism - How does one deal with it ?
By kiran8
@kiran8 (15348)
Mangalore, India
September 21, 2011 11:55am CST
One of the students in our school has been having difficulty with writing words and forming sentences.He is quite a smart child and is interested in most other things, but this problem with writing has been makes him diffident and insecure.
The class teacher , after having observed him and realised that he had autism , called the parents and asked them to take him to a psychiatrist for counselling and in fact fixed an appointment with one, through the school.The mother on hearing this started crying and blaming the school for not having good teachers who could take care of her son's needs etc etc...The father was slightly better , more understanding and finally they did take the child to the psychiatrist , who said that along with his counselling , a lot of special attention needs to be given to the child both at home and at school.The teacher was ready to comply with this, in fact she went and met the Psychiatrist herself to know first hand what has to be done. The mother was told that she has to give him more attention and also make him feel needed by sitting with him at bed time, telling stories and generally get him in the right frame mind after which , one can slowly deal with his problem with the studies. She created such a fuss,saying that all this does not make him get marks instead will make him spoilt and he difficult.The grandmother who lives with them was even worse, saying that they never had such a disease in their family so far, may be the school is to blame for everything...
One wonders how to deal with such women? Can't they analyse the situation for themselves and take the advise of the experts and at least try and do something constructive ...
3 people like this
5 responses
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
23 Sep 11
Hi Kiran,
It may be the frustrations of a mother on hearing a bad news; I mean it may be her first reactions. No mother wanted to listen bad news about their kids, which is quite natural. I hope she will realize the reality and work for her child. I don’t have much knowledge with this issue but I read that much care needed by these children. If there is support from parents the child can overcome any disabilities. For that, parents should be ready to accept the disability and should ready to work on solving the same.
It may be the frustrations of a mother on hearing a bad news; I mean it may be her first reactions. No mother wanted to listen bad news about their kids, which is quite natural. I hope she will realize the reality and work for her child. I don’t have much knowledge with this issue but I read that much care needed by these children. If there is support from parents the child can overcome any disabilities. For that, parents should be ready to accept the disability and should ready to work on solving the same.
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
24 Sep 11
Hello Kiran, that means the mother already knows and she just want to blame the school or teachers. If she thinks that way it is more harmful for her child. She should think about her child, how to work on him instead of thinking other's reaction... My wish, she should accept the truth,seek solutions, how she can help her child and lead him to a successful life.
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
24 Sep 11
Exactly Sreekala, she knows but wants to blame others or she is too stupid !In her position I would have taken a long leave and concentrated on my child.As you rightly point out , one should think of the child first, having created it, it is the responsibility of the parents to do their best...It is no use talking to her since she never comes to the school, even though one of the things the Counselor had mentioned was to co ordinate every week with the class teacher of the child and see how the child is progressing...The class teacher is in fact doing a good job,calling the counselor and reporting whatever she feels is necessary...
1 person likes this
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
23 Sep 11
Hi Sreekala, thanks a lot for your response
I doubt if it is the first reaction since it is more than a month now and she has done very little towards doing anything constructive, nor does she take the child for counselling, the father does it..The problem with her is that ,she has taken it personally and feels that if she accepts childs condition and starts taking him for counselling etc, others will come to know and it will reflect badly on her....
I doubt if it is the first reaction since it is more than a month now and she has done very little towards doing anything constructive, nor does she take the child for counselling, the father does it..The problem with her is that ,she has taken it personally and feels that if she accepts childs condition and starts taking him for counselling etc, others will come to know and it will reflect badly on her....1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 11
I don't think they want to hear it or to believe it. But they will eventually settle down and work with him, I hope.
With us, it wasn't me who had a hard time when our son was diagnosed with autism, it was his father. I just sort of dug and and figured out what I had to do, and started doing it.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Oct 11
Some people don't like being told what to do maybe.
My son is just fine, thanks...
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
4 Oct 11
Hi Kiran!
It is really a difficult scenario. I think the child's parents/grand parents were not willing to accept the reality and it was easier for them to blame the school authorities/teachers. I feel that they will start realizing the actual situation sooner than later because the reality about their child can not be altered. I think they should support the child with the help of psychiatrist and the concerned teachers.
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
5 Oct 11
Hi deepak what you say is true! However, it also shows that there is a lack of awareness among people regarding such problems that arise in children and normally one tries to look elsewhere for blame.But , having been told by an expert psychologist and also a school where the management and the teacher has taken the initiative to handle the problem in the right manner, the parents should be grateful and do whatever they could to help out their own child...
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
7 Oct 11
Lack of awareness could be one of the reasons for not understanding the problem. However, parents should have faced the reality, rather than blaming all and sundry.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
22 Sep 11
Autism can be cured. It needs parents special care. Teachers can help. But the parents have to follow the advice of the specialists to make normal of their autistic child. If they blame others it is their foolishness. The mother and the grandma of the poor child should be treated first.
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
22 Sep 11
Hi bhanu, thanks a lot for your response what you say is true, it can definitely be cured and it is in the hands of the parents ...LOL. thats exactly what we were speaking in the staff room yesterday that the mother and the granny needed counselling more than the child...
what you say is true, it can definitely be cured and it is in the hands of the parents ...LOL. thats exactly what we were speaking in the staff room yesterday that the mother and the granny needed counselling more than the child...1 person likes this
@anil02 (24688)
• India
22 Sep 11
Good Morning Kiran ji, parents are first teacher of child. It is general nature of human being blaming other for their faults. What can you do as teacher. Only you can suggest his parents. Teachers are doing their duty honestly. Now it is duty of parents to care this child.
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
22 Sep 11
Hi anil,Teachers no doubt can do only so much since they cannot give individual attention to any child for a long time whereas it is the duty of the parents to do so when the child is still growing and dependent on them...However, some parents want to have children without any responsibilities that come with it, especially when they need to give special care and attention...
1 person likes this
