Someone That I Used to Love

It is truly sad that he doesn't love or care about you. If you are unhappy with him then you should do whatever will make you happy. Your children may not understand if they are young but they will understand when they get older. You have to make yourself happy. I know someone in a similar situation and their kids are pretty much grown. They are doing what makes them happy and I think that is the best thing to do. Everybody deserves to be happy. I hope you find your happiness.

This not not the way to live sweetie. Somwhow swomewhere you need to get out of this. Believe me, you won't be able to cope much longer. No offense. Leave him, take your children and go to family or something. Just get out.

hi dear! It is really sad to hear that he continues to show indifference towards you. It is understandable that you have your own limits. If he goes beyond those limits, you will start withdrawing yourself. Talk to him that you used to respect and love him and you still are his better half and his carelessness is hurting you deep down in your heart. Even if you feel that he might not 'listen' to you with intent, you must communicate your feelings to him. God willing, it might work. Give it a try, no harm in all trying. Don't feel disappointed that everything is gone and can not be retrieved. My best wishes are with you. :-)

This is not an easy subject for me to discuss simply because I tried to live it. I finally decided and had to get out. I generally do not tell people/couples that they should split. The only thing I can tell you is that think about the number of years you have been dealing with this and add the same amount of years fast forward. Do you see yourself happier and or much more unhappier with the situation. Think about the years that have already past you by and how you will never get those years again, no matter how much you wish for them and or try. If you can assess all of this you may find what is right for you. We only have one life and do keep in mind that I completely understand that the children need the both of you. But do they really have the both of you when it is not both, it is you and then Dad. Staying in this type of situation, with time they will realize that this is happening and having daughter(s), will show her/them that this is common and she/they will be so accustomed to this type of living situation that they may also be involved with the same in the future. I do hope you do really think about the entire picture, in that picture there is a you who is sacrificing her life and someday your children will be grown and what about you.

hi eurekafemme, I understand your feelings but somehow I think it is better to call it quit though your kids need a father but he is just a father not a husband anymore in my own opinion relationship should be two way street you love him and he should love you back too,,,,,,,,,,,,but in your situation it seems you are just a nanny sorry for the term I hope one day you will realized that there is another new life for you without him for sure your kids will understand you someday. Hope to meet you happy mylotting

Hi eureka, i can understand how difficult it is to even hope for a little change though we know that change is not going to happen in the immediate future. We love the kids as well and for their sake we still adjust with someone who have no feeling towards us. But for us this 'someone' matters most. In life we face lot of troubles and it is not always the same situations. Better we calm ourselves and move on to the next step. The more we think of it the more we feel sad/ upset.

its good that you accept very early and don't hurt yourself still more...relationships like these are very hard to overcome..but yes...you can if u r determined....your kids are your responsibility and you should give priority to them....

of course we think about the welfare and the feelings of the children. but we also have the right to be happy. i've been there and found my happiness.

Please don't take this the wrong way, but I wish there was a way I could let you know that life would still go on even without the person-you-used-to-love. I know that the 'children' is a convenient excuse to stay. I know that you love your children so much that you don't want to deprive them of a complete family that's why you choose to stay. But I've personally seen the ill-effects of relationship that doesn't work anymore, to the mentality and personality of the children. I pray that you get what I also always pray for -strength and wisdom. That you may use this tools to break free from this relationship that continue to cause you pain.

I have been in the same situation that you are in. Maybe because you still want to preserved the solidarity of a family that is causing you to stay. Its your choice since nobody can tell you what and what you can't do. People can only listen and make suggestions but you know deep within you what you must do. I choose to walk out of a relationship that is killing me inside out and I can say I never regretted the choice that I made since I am freer and happier now. I did hold on just so that the family is whole but I realize it was me that is subjecting myself to being tortured everyday in thoughts, emotions, financially and I have lost trust and faith in Him so why stick on.

I've lived in a situation much like yours and my kids are grown. I have wanted to leave many times. I refuse to let him make me miserable. And with age he does show me more respect now. But if I want to do something or go some wheres I do it. I'm my own person and if he doesn't like it, he's free to leave if he wants too. I have put just as much sweat and time into this home as he has. But it would be nice to share the love and affection we once knew. It does hurt when the spark is gone. Getting it back may or may not be worth the trouble.

Even i don't know about your story,but i don't feel sad for you,because that's the life you have choosen.you will have some other ways to live happily,but you are not willing.one think i like in you is your confidence and faith.i heartly wish your life should be happy as you like.love for your kids.