how would you know if a child was abused sexually?

You could bring her to both. Psychiatrist and the ob gyne. Even if the incidents have long been passed, they could still find out if it's real or not. You see, I wouldn't believe right away because children these days do lie. However, I wouldn't show her that I am a skeptic either. It's best if you bring her to both to be sure. Anyway, I can't help but feel sorry if it was indeed true that she was being abused. That father should be sent to jail and whatever he did should be done to him as well. Have a great MyLot experience ahead!

In her condition right now, it so hard to tell whether she is sexually abused or not. I mean look at her, gang member,out of school, a freak, whatsoever. I mean how could justify she is being raped or not? Many of our youth today is really into gang, because that is what they want.

The obstet wouldn't be much point, all he could show is that she is sexually active. And since precocious sexuality often accompanies abuse, she may well have been sexually active with more than her father - ah, I see, you alredy know this. The problem I face with these things is that "children" these days are immensely more sophisticated than they were in my day, so the possibility of her lying in the way her mother says is definitely in play. And I also have the issue that in these cases men are usually considered guilty by accusation. In this case the chance of him being found guilty, even if he is, is slight, but he will forever be considered by many as a child abuser, even if he isn't. A very difficult dilemma. I'm not sure I can advise, but if I did, I would say trust your intuition as to whether the mother or the daughter is telling the truth, and go from there. Lash

Hi churchill, You can try these things: 1. Check the social behavior of her father. 2. Check the relationship between her father and mother. 3. I am not sure how can a 13 years old be a member of some gang and do all these non-sense things but check when exactly it started, I mean, was it a sudden change in her behavior or it was with her from the beginning. 4. I am not sure if it is possible but you can take help of hypnotism. 5. Psychiatrist will also be a good option. 6. Check the relationship of this girl with his gang members, you will come to know about her mentality. 7. Does this girl has any sibling, if yes, check his/her relationship with the parents, particularly with the father, it will give you a better idea. I am not an expert on these things but I am sure that these things will help you to conclude something from this situation.

I think that she doesn't have reason to lie, I think they have to listen to her, and take care of her, she just a kid, and in the future she will regret on all what she is doing now. Now is when she needs her family.

I think that you should bring her to a psychiatrist and to an OB Gyne. I guess there is still a way to find out the truth because once you bring her to an OB Gyne, the doctor would know as to what really happened once she finishes examining the child. You have to observe for the relationship between the child and her parents.

I would believe the child. Usually in these cases the mother never wants to believe that her husband would do this. If the mother seems like a decent mother than that child would not have been raised to want to act out. A child at six if they are being touched they will let you know because they do not know what is going on so they will show signs of indications like if you ask if someone has ever touched their butt/butterfly a child at six would think this is funny and start laughing saying no. If a child who was hurt there will say no they hurt my butt. They know the difference of a spanking and something that hurts in different ways. Now do you know when she confessed to being sexually abused? If the child is running away from home because they do not want to be around the father then something is wrong. usually girls especially little girls run to their daddies not away unless they were harmed by them. I would seek professional psychiatric help for the little girl. I would also get her on her yearly pap tests as well l to make sure since she is sexually active that she has not caught anything. The OB/GYN is not going to be able to tell you that it was her father since she has had another partner in the process, but you can get her on birth control before her situation gets worst by adding a child in the mix. But like I said i would believe the child and let her know that you are there for her so she will know that someone is there when she needs them.

It is so sad to here such things. As long as it is her father, he never deserve to call as a father if did so. Here every one will be panic as the child is still so young and a minor. She recollects the incident at the age of 6 and there is no witness for the same. Also, we are not sure that if the father was engaged any such things with his daughter, what was the real thing he performed on her. As being a father he must have taken to his shoulders, or must have giving bathing, and cleaned her body areas and many more. It cannot be considered as in such a way and in short we are baseless. Now she is still saying she has involvement with her b/f and imagine a child of 13 is proclaiming that she is already doing such practices, I don't think we should promote such dealings any more. The best thing what you can do now is, advice the girl child and make her understand the impact and implications upon such things. Acting as a good friend, you can bring her back to normal life and many children are exploited in such way from the very young age. Now you can save her as long as you are aware of it. Also, ask her to forget whatever happened in the past life and come up like a good girl. It was an age of unawareness and people exploited our weakness. This is what really happening and happened also. Let her understand fully and if the girl is a school child, ask her to concentrate on studies and if any boy or boyfriend are approaching for such things, ask her not give such chances like be alone with such boys, or not to be visible alone with the boy and if again he insists, say NO to anything and if compelled, ask her to say the things in public. If she really want to get rid of such non-sense, not it is the time and if she really like all those things then forget and let her do whatever she wants. As a girl, it is her responsibility to take care and as long as she is a minor of 13 years old, this is the time they need help from you people and if you can, give her moral support and have a watch on the girl. If you can do this much, it this may be the best thing you can do in your life. Save a child who is already spoiled by her father and others. Also, you don't make it public and resolve this matter without knowing anyone because she is so young and she need help and protection. All the best and you have my full support in all ways as much as I can give you. Thank-s

If I were in your position, I would contact DSWD, or get help from the police.