Do i need to pay someones debt?
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
Philippines
October 12, 2011 9:07am CST
My cousin asking me to used my credit card last year for some important matter, since she is my cousin i lend her my card and i make sure to it that she need to pay on the due date, after several use she is consistently pay the due date on time but after awhile when she used it in a big amount or purchase some big amount used by my card, she did not pay on time already, so the charges got bigger and there is also a penalty charges, i always asked her to pay her obligation to my card but still she did not pay, i also got it on the installment basis to make it easier to pay my due date, but still no payment be made. Now, its almost a year, yet the bank always call me and asking to pay that she purchase, and i dont have that kind of money to pay for the debt that i am not the one who used.
Is it ok to ask her to pay her obligation for my credit card? or told her husband about this so he can help me to pay her debt?
12 responses
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
13 Oct 11
You definitely should ask her to pay you back. Unfortunately from the bank's point of view, the bank lent the money to you not to her, so they will think that you are responsible.
If you have to, I'd go to her husband as well.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
15 Oct 11
Yes it is so frustrating, i was really disappointed with her.
@soapies1973 (931)
• United States
13 Oct 11
She spent the money and technically she should pay. The problem is that since it is in your name now you are stuck with the debt. I understand you want to help family but now you have the debt.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
14 Oct 11
I was thought that i was helping her, but now i realized that i put myself in a bad situation and stuck in the debt that im not the one who used.
I always thought helping others specially your family or relatives would be feel better but now after this, i just really don't know how to feel, specially when someone who you knew will never do that to you, is the one who put you in trouble.
All this situation and all the comments, i would definitely learned a lesson by never ever let someone to use my card. and once is enough.
Thanks soapies for your comments.
@junmae (1586)
• Philippines
13 Oct 11
She should pay the debt and you have the right to ask her about it because she was the one who purchased using your card and not you. I had a co-worker who also used my credit card but it took several months to pay all the purchases she made from it. I was mad because I was the one who pay the bills before and it also caused an argument between us. I never stopped informing her that she must pay it because it is her obligation not mine and I have to be consistent for it.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
14 Oct 11
I am mad at her right now, and even i don't want to get mad at her, the way she do this to me i don't know how to be feel for her, because now she showed me how she was when in term of money and she can never be repeated again to me. I always inform her monthly due to the card but she keeps on silent with this, now i'm starting to pay for it even just the minimum amount. its just that thinking that i wasted my money for something that i did not used or benefits for it.
But Thanks anyways, i will still inform her and will not stop until she pays me.
@megamatt (14291)
• United States
13 Oct 11
I think that you made a huge mistake by lending her your credit card. That is something that you never should do. Even if they are family. Especially if they are family. Any debt that they got is on your head if it does not get paid. There are a lot of people who pull "the important matter" sob story and then charge up a lot, leaving someone else holding the bag.
This is why I would never let someone do this. This is why I don't even lend people money. I fully expect it never to be paid back. If someone is in a desperate enough situation to ask you to do this anyway, they are not going to pay it back to say the very least. Do not trust anyone to pay you back. You're the one who is going to get burned rather bad.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
14 Oct 11
Hi megamatt, i was just trying to help her before and never thought that she will did this to me, now that i know his attitude with regards in this, i never trusted her again, i can still show her my kindness and help her again in some other ways but not anymore with regards in money, it so sad that you will really notice the true color of the person when in terms of money matter, id still love her because she is still my cousin but the fact that she did this to me, i set my wall from her from now on. This is not the first time she did this to me, before a small amount then that is ok, but this will be the last time.
@r3jcorp (1382)
• Philippines
12 Oct 11
I am in a bad situation like yours. My card was used by my bestfriend for her business. She got a bad loss and migrated to Australia to run away from her other obligations. It's also been a year, at first month she pays her monthly dues. Later on, she is not even sending a single centavo and I was force to enter to an installment basis. Now, I am receiving a demand letter and I kept on texting her about it but haven't receive any reply. I also told my husband, he was angry at first because I should tell him prior to my decision. It is on our name that's why we have to pay it. I can do nothing but to pray that she will have a good fate and a good heart to pay it in the future.
@r3jcorp (1382)
• Philippines
12 Oct 11
Or else you have to file a case in the court against your cousin. If you are from the Philippines, you can file a small claims which does not need to have an attorney if the amount is less than One Hundred Thousand Pesos. There is only one hearing and the decision is much faster than the usual cases. But before you can do that, ask her/him to write an acknowledgement of the loan, tell her that you told the situation to your husband and he will help you, he just want to have an assurance to that she/he will pay you in the future (or any other story which will make her to sign). You have to maintain a good relationship until you have her signature because she might just deny the loan. I got a bad lesson in TRUST because of some people who does not know to handle their responsibilities.
@Quietgirl (95)
• Spain
13 Oct 11
I think you shouldn't involve her husband in it that would make you create serious problems with her , you should
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
14 Oct 11
I was really irritated with her, she has no response in all my reminders and messages, that is why i like also her husband to know what is really going on, i also thinking to let her father to know so they can help me to forward my message with her. I dont know if this is the right idea but i like also to give it a try.
@owlwings (43910)
• Cambridge, England
12 Oct 11
The card is in your name and so any charges to the card are legally your responsibility. You will find that clearly stated in the Terms and Conditions which you agreed to when you signed up for the card.
Of course, your cousin has a responsibility TO YOU to pay off the debt but, if she doesn't, then the Bank have a perfect right to make you pay the money. Yes, you should ask your cousin to pay the debt and, if she can't, then you should discuss with her about whether her husband can help. If she does not want to involve her husband and will not pay the debt, I think that you would be quite within your rights to insist that he is aware of the situation and to talk to him even without her permission. It depends on the laws about responsibility in marriage but in many countries a husband can ultimately be held responsible for his wife's debts.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
13 Oct 11
Legally i know i'm the one who liable to pay the amount to the bank, its just get me frustrated to my cousin because she did not or dont want to pay anymore, i keep on telling her and remind every week to pay the balance to my card but no response at all on her side, i did also ask her sister to tell her about her obligation in my card, still she did not contact me about this. I just want her husband to know what is the real story and situation that her wife did to me, and hoping to pay the amount for what her wife used since he is the husband.
@writersolutions10 (497)
• India
12 Oct 11
Don't give you credit card to any one and you will be in trouble later.. so be careful with the money and your debt management..
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
13 Oct 11
I just let her and allowed to use my credit card with my authority since i trusted her and she is my cousin, i never thought that there will be a problem just until now, but your right with regards in money you lend we should be careful to the person who we trust specially when we are the one to have problem later on.
Thanks writer...
@clearwater18 (695)
• Philippines
12 Oct 11
I guess your cousin abused the kindness you've given her. Talk to her and let her understand what's going on. Tell her that she needs to pay and that you don't have enough money to help her. It's okay for you to ask her to pay because it was her who really has a debt but if she still won't pay you, then maybe you can ask and tell her husband about this. But telling the husband I think would make your cousin feel bad. But then, you should let her understand that the credit card is under your name and that if it doesn't get paid, you are to be held liable.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
13 Oct 11
Hi clearwater, yes, i showed her my kindness and also i trusted her, i always told her about her obligation in my card and already told her that i dont have enough money to pay her debt because i do have also a monthly dues to pay. I was planning to tell her husband about this, and another reason is because i want also his the one who confront her regarding this and asking her to pay me. i know its sound not good because this will be the cause of their argue or misunderstanding but i just want her to know that her husband know already and maybe she will have the guts to pay me. i also told her that do not disgrace my name because i dont want also to ruin my name in any ways specially to the bank. Hoping for it.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
12 Oct 11
Of course it is okay to asked her and let her husband know about it. In the first place, she showed no shame using your credit card spending on something expensive. It is her obligation to pay you. You already did her a favor lending your card to her, and i think you're being too good being shy on asking her about the payments.
I hope you never lend anyone your credit card again.
@Mikaela_taz25 (1842)
• Philippines
13 Oct 11
Hi enelym, i was just planning to tell her husband about this, but what i just worried is maybe this will be the cause of their argue, though i want also the husband to confront her about this so she would face me and contact me regarding her obligation. I also tell her that what i did was giving her a favor for using my card and the favor i wanted her in return is to just pay that on time and dont let her ruin my name and unable to use my card when i needed to use it. But for now, i cant use it anymore because they wanted me to pay first even the half of the amount. And im not a kind of person also to ask for a payment when someone borrow a money for me because i believe that they know their responsibility, but unfortunately i need to ask this from her and i'm getting tired of accepting the calls from the bank asking me to pay.
I never lend my credit card again, i learned my lesson. Thanks..
@Quietgirl (95)
• Spain
13 Oct 11
I think you shouldn't involve her husband in it that would make you create serious problems with her , you should
@Quietgirl (95)
• Spain
13 Oct 11
I think you shouldn't involve her husband in it that would make you create serious problems with her , you should
