We always seem to have something to 'talk about' often...
By laydee
@laydee (12798)
Philippines
October 13, 2011 9:54am CST
At my best days, I could be said to have the ability to talk too much, to give advises even if it weren't asked. I just guess I have something to say on each topic, however, there are times when I must admit that I should shut up because I know nothing of what the topic is really about.
Do you ever feel that?
I usually feel I have to say something, most especially if the topic is about relationships and love. However, when it's one of those days when things aren't really as pretty as I wanted it to be (perhaps a failure in the relationship, etc.) I come to realize that I am no expert on things because I can't even solve my own issues.
Why do you think we are made that way? Why do you think that we are all born advisers? Are you same as me? How do you deal with people like me? Giving unsolicited advises.
Thank you ahead for participating!
3 responses
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
13 Oct 11
...sounds like you are talking to me advising me to talk less and not to give advice. - joking here
Yes, I can relate as I think advice is far easy to give but harder to follow. I think I might have some good advice sometimes but then I do not always understand if this is what the other person wants. Sometimes they do ask. Usually it is the form of a question or they simply ask for opinion and I give it. It may not always be right for them but I give it with good intention and hope that it can help because if it was me on the other end, I would appreciate someone trying to help even if it didn't suit me. Well at least they tried.
I do understand what you are saying though because I can get into a real habit of offering suggestions or ideas or even as you put it advice. If the person is not asking for any advice or I am sure this happens a lot too, I have not understood exactly the point being presented and so go off track as to what the person means and even end up offending the person, perhaps.
If I talk too much or sound like I am telling someone else what to do all I can say is I am sorry and I was truly just trying to help. The way I look at this if there were more people like you and me, maybe there would be more talking, more advice being given but if good will is there and we are reasonable with each other...it is better than silence or one liners without substance?
@gayop2091 (68)
•
14 Oct 11
hello yup we are born to be advisers we are good enough to gave advises to people who are in need..to people we are around with like our friends, our families too.we gave them comfort esp when they were in pain in heartaches neither,in difficulties situation that that had been undertaking.. we can help them to tell whats good for them,they can feel better also thus releasing their emotion.
This would be our being unique because there something in us that when we are in trouble we need someone to be with to talk the issue thus relieving that emotion..therefore i can tell that no one is an island...
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
15 Oct 11
Maybe the thing that wants to make us try to help or give advice is the fact that someone has helped us in the past and we need to pass this human compassion forward. It is sometimes risky to offer advice though because it is not always accepted as friendly or even wanted. There is a time not to give advice and that time is when the other person does not want any. I guess they want to be alone on the island. But that only lasts for a while. Angry hearts first seek solitude but then become lonely hearts which seek friends.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (136383)
• India
14 Oct 11
Although one is expected to practice before one preaches some are really capable of giving sound advice to others without them practicing it themselves. What's wrong in it any way. So don't feel bad laydee. If you are a good preacher so be it. I am ready to listen!.I used to give unsolicited advice but these days there are very few who are willing to listen.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
10 Apr 12
Hehehe.. I guess I was just frustrated that time and that's why I was able to open the topic up. Anyhow, I guess the main reason why we can't help but give unsolicited advice is the fact that those who can see the bigger picture could see the best way out of it. What I mean to say is, when one has a problem, the mind is full of negative vibes, and since the person is really burdened by the problem, he/she might not be thinking all to well. On the other hand, the person who's not involved with the problem might see some light in it, that's why we could give advise better.
Anyhow, I'm sad to know that there are only a very few people who are willing to listen to you. Why is that?
Thanks for dropping by and I apologize for not being able to reply the soonest! Have a great MyLot experience ahead!
@besssia (94)
• Philippines
14 Oct 11
We are thinking beings. It is just normal for us to be opinionated. We just have to remember to be tactful all the time. Because like you said, sometimes our opinions are unsolicited in some cases. So, let's just remember where we stand in that certain person's life for us to be aware when to give our opinions or if it is necessary for that person to hear from our side. :)
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