List your faults

@dawnald (85146)
Shingle Springs, California
October 20, 2011 8:43am CST
So I notice on these dating sites that people always put their best foot forward. Well almost always. I am romantic, athletic, successful, people notice the glint in my eye, etc. etc. etc. Nobody's talking about their faults. lol Now just imagine these sites had a section where you could list them, and it was mandatory. What do you think people would say? What would you say? Would you be honest?
5 people like this
40 responses
@topffer (42156)
• France
20 Oct 11
If I was joining seriously a dating site to find a wife for the rest of my life, I would make honestly a complete list of my faults. If I was joining one to have some love affairs to kill my boredom, the list would be left blank.
2 people like this
• United States
21 Oct 11
I have an idea who did it, but I would not want to reveal the culprit in such a public way, especially if I am wrong about who it was.
2 people like this
• United States
21 Oct 11
I did not know that you had faults, Top, except for the fact that you never learned to drive that wheelchair of yours and forever keep crashing the thing. Oh yeah, you probably wouldn't mention the wheelchair part, huh?
2 people like this
@topffer (42156)
• France
21 Oct 11
I have also bad memories and I can't remember who crashed my last wheelchair at myLot. Have you an idea?
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
20 Oct 11
hi dawn yes I think I could be honest if I was younger and in the need of dating again. I would put down I am shy, I have a q uick temper and I will not date anyone who is dumb, stupid, or ignorant.AS I made thpse mistakes first time round,
2 people like this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
29 Oct 11
Hey Hatley and PQ...help me out here. Please don't get me wrong here because I totally agree with you but aren't you being incredibly judgemental and intolerant?? Those are two things I would list as my faults and I try not to be like that and it gets me into trouble.
1 person likes this
@topffer (42156)
• France
20 Oct 11
I am a bit stupid, but I am sure I would improve at your contact, ladies. Would not you give me a chance?
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Oct 11
Hi Hatley! Same with me. I would date anyone who is stupid. If he can't express himself without the help of cuss words I don't want him either.
2 people like this
@BCRMike (355)
• Vanderhoof, British Columbia
22 Oct 11
If I could think of any I would. Hahaha It would have to be I am a political junkie and I like Obama and still hold Tommy Douglas, the Canadian MP who was responsible for getting us universal single payer healthcare.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Do you have an ex wife I can ask?
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
"starter wife" lol
@BCRMike (355)
• Vanderhoof, British Columbia
31 Oct 11
Oh heavens yes. I had a starter wife. She is bitter and twisted too. But, you might get 'His Faults' volumes 1 and 2 from her.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Oct 11
Haas! We don't tend to be fully aware of our faults. It's usually someone else who points them out to us. Let's. See...I've been told I was hard to live with, noncommunicative, coy, and a host of other descriptive terms. But they are exes. So what do they know??? He he
2 people like this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
I'm too dang aware of them, and insecure about them too...
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
20 Oct 11
Once I tried selling a car myself and told everything that was wrong about it (first thing) I was honest but did not sell the car. I think people if required would say silly things that everyone can be faulted for but does not mean too much like sometimes sleep in or whatever. What would I say? I would say I am too busy for dating.
2 people like this
21 Oct 11
i think bluedoll you are right, that people would just list silly faults like being untidy or not liking cooking, rather than real ones, as too be honest i am not sure if i really know what my real faults are. maybe a good alternative is that we have to supply references, so we can check if the hard luck story about how mean the last partner was is really true.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Of course, one person's silly could be somebody else's deadly serious....
• Romania
20 Oct 11
I would say that I am lazy and I hate to cook. Well, who wants me know? Now really, I'm cooking because I have to eat something, but I really hate spending a lot of time in the kitchen for almost nothing.
2 people like this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Sometimes I don't mind cooking, but I really am not fond of cleaning...
@GardenGerty (160978)
• United States
20 Oct 11
Some job applications are that way as well. I try to be honest in a positive light. What is your strength--I am responsible. What is your biggest weakness--I am responsible. Worst job review I ever had said I always pitched in and did everyone else's work and they could not tell who was goofing off. You know the drill. I take responsibility for my work and often for every one else's. How about, I am a good cook and a bad housekeeper? That would work for me for dating. I would always try to outweigh the bad with the good and be honest.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160978)
• United States
2 Nov 11
I just do enough of the cleaning to get by. I think if we had some repairs done I would do more.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
I can cook and I hate cleaning. I guess a lot of us are in that boat.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
20 Oct 11
For starters (this is what puts most guys off).Independent woman...if I date someone they say it to me like it's a sin.....chubby middle...arthritic knees....That's what I would say....but I am not sure others would be so honest. My sister's friend signed up for a sight ....she put up..if you are looking for Barbie just keep going....she listed her big behinder....well her now husband answered....the bigger the better...on the way to their first date he kept thinking....I hope its big enough. She kept thinking....I hope it's not too big. They have been happily married for several years now.....in this case...honesty was the best policy.
1 person likes this
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
21 Oct 11
By any chance Did they have Queen's "Fat bottomed Girls" played at the wedding?!
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Big behinder lol I'm not going to be with anybody who thinks an independent woman is a sin, nope...
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
20 Oct 11
I would be honest.. and I guarantee you nobody would be interested in me at all! But I think it's best to be honest from the start so people know what they're getting themselves into. It's better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for who you are not. My faults would include insecurity, controlling, quick tempered, judgemental, loves to complain, loves to talk about myself and easily stressed.. the longer I think on this, the more I'm adding, LOL.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
You'd be surprised. Somebody would look at you and decide they like your eyes or your smile, or just your honesty, and make the effort to get to know you. You'd probably have to weed thru a lot of idiots first though.
• United States
1 Nov 11
Aren't they pretty much all idiots? IDK.. I've always sworn that if I get a divorce, I'm just going to stay single forever. You know, I'll have certain friends with benefits so that certain needs get met.. but I really don't think I'll ever want to deal with another serious relationship again. Not that my relationship is bad..
@celticeagle (168330)
• Boise, Idaho
21 Oct 11
I doubt people would be honest. They want to put that best foot forward. And it would defeat the purpose of the sites. I would have to say that I am selfish, lathargic, lazy, non-conformist, negative, cautious, rebellious, procrastinator, depressed, easily panicked, shy, and sarcastic.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Those are some of my best qualities!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (168330)
• Boise, Idaho
1 Nov 11
You can certainly look at that way, huh?
@celticeagle (168330)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Oct 11
I am too pathetic to even fully describe.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Oct 11
LOL! Do you know the song "B!tch" by Meridith Brooks? Well, I would probably say to listen to that song, and if you still wanted to talk to me, then do it at your own risk.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
naw.... At least it doesn't come thru that way!
• United States
1 Nov 11
Alright, so that might be overstating it a bit, but at least it will hopefully weed out the wimps that can't handle a woman that tells it like it is rather than "sugar coating" everything to try to avoid hurting their feelings. I am not really that bad, and I would not intentionally hurt someone's feelings, but I do tend to be a little more honest than most.
@much2say (56088)
• Los Angeles, California
22 Oct 11
Ha ha. Well, I think knowing the faults are just as important as knowing the good stuff . . . if you meet this person, you're bound to find out anyway (hopefully) - just faster if it's mandatory and up front! I know I would be honest about it - no reason to lie. But I don't know that others would be as honest. A listed fault could be not so bad as you thought . . . or it could be way worse!!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
yeah, could be way worse... At least if you're upfront about it, the person won't feel blindsided.
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
22 Oct 11
I would be vague! Just like when I go to job interviews. When they ask me what are my good traits, I would say I am very detailed. And then when they ask what are my bad traits, I would also say I'm very detailed. So for a dating site, I would put the same best-foot and faults. Best foot: romantic, athletic, successful Faults: too romantic, too athletic, too successful
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
oh you poor thing, too successful... lol
@sswallace21 (1824)
• United States
21 Oct 11
I thought a fault lied beneath the Earth's surface. Causing earthquakes evertime it chose to move. Those mean old fault lines have caused deaths, flooding, buildings and roads to collapse and last but not least it has left some people homeless. Costing sociey millions of dollars. Best Wishes!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Ok, this may be a new concept, but did you know that some words have more than one meaning?
• United States
1 Nov 11
lol!
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
21 Oct 11
I have noticed that also. I would list my faults and want them to do the same thing. I would not want to waste each others time if they have faults that I cannot handle and vice versa.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Yeah even if you don't really list such things on a dating site, you'd want to be up front with the person not too long after you actually meet.
@Christoph56 (1504)
• Canada
21 Oct 11
Almost all of these sites have a comments section, though, and through that comments section, you can put whatever you'd like, including your faults! Of course, people still usually put down faults that aren't really faults, its like when a employer is asking an interviewee about their faults, and they say they work too hard... maybe on the dating sites they'd say they exercise too much, or they concentrate too much on their beauty, or they're workaholics.... I'm thinking of my negatives.... and I just wouldn't want to put them down.... on any site!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
There are some I wouldn't put down either, though I'd be honest with a prospective partner about them privately.
• United States
21 Oct 11
I think the reason people focus on their good qualities first is because it's very healthy to state the positive aspects about who you are as a person. When you focus or dwell on the negatives, it tends to drain you and I think it can promote a lot of bad self esteem. I definitely think it's healthy to recognize our faults, and especially those we can change, but I also feel like it's more important to focus on our good qualities which is why I think a lot of people do that on here. :)
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Healthy, hm, never thought of it that way!
@psrpit (39)
• India
21 Oct 11
I think to list their faults they go to the church and confess. They prey for forgiveness then they think the faults have been washed off. Now they can put best foot forward. Remembering good attracts good.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Dang, ima gonna go and confess right now!
• Philippines
21 Oct 11
That's natural, because if you put there your worst attitude then who will date you? As for me, I would do the same. I think that's acceptable.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Not your worst attitude, just being honest about your faults.
• China
21 Oct 11
I always want achieve many goals at the same time,but in the end all fail.I believe I will be responsible for my futurer,however,some organisation I'm fond of have reject my applicants as I can't pass the examination of language skill.I'm upset now.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
31 Oct 11
Um, OK, a bit off topic?