If a woman is pregnant or is with a child with a man... is that an assurance

I think love become meaningful if you can wake up to see that someone you love for the rest of your life. Forcing yourself pregnant or to have a child with a man who doesn't love you is a waste of time. The man will only accept the child but will never be there for you. This adds more hurt to already miserable life.

Hi chiyosan, I consider this to be an outdated weapon, but still there are women who is up to this old trick to hang on to a relationship. She just might get away with it if her alleged boyfriend is a kindhearted gentleman. Otherwise she is doomed for life if she decides to have the baby. It is still considered as a taboo for a woman to have a child out of wedlock in this part of the world. A relationship should be built on love and trust, not upon pregnancy. The feeling of love should come spontaneously and not out of obligation. This will ensure a long lasting and happy life. If a man loves a woman he should set her free. If she loves him she will come back to him and vice versa.

Hi chiyosan! Definitely not. I have seen a lot of cases where couples split even if they have already children. I also have seen cases where the girl gets pregnant but the guy does not take responsibility for it and leaves the girl. This is what actually happened to a few of my friends from high school. It's an unfortunate thing to happen especially when you think of the future of the baby. I could not possibly understand why people don't think of the future but I guess, when you're in love, unexpected things can happen.

Of course not, it would never be an assurance....but some women in the Philippines are using it to force the man who got them impregnated to marry them..they don't realize that they are just making things complicated and worse. If it happened to me and I got pregnant with the man I love, i would be thankful that i got a child from him to whom I will focus all my love and attention. It that man would marry me just because of the child I would not agree, but if he would marry me because he loves me and that i am the person he wanted to be with for the rest of his life whether with or without child, I would definitely accept.

No I will never do such thing. If ever I get pregnant with a man and he don't want to take responsibility of it, I will save some of my pride. And will make sure that I will find some way to raise my child. I won't even use the child to force him to stay with me.

My mom's friend thinks that this is true. She is thirty eight years old now and have five kids that have different fathers. And all of the fathers of her children are long gone now; she cannot contact them nor ask for financial support. Every time she meets a man, she always allow them to impregnate her thinking that they would love her and would stick to her. However, the opposite thing happened. They all ran from their responsibilities and totally forgot about her and their children. Now she has to raise all her children on her own. She always calls my mom, crying and asking for help. She said her life is so screwed up and she'd rather die than face all her problems alone. In my opinion, those women who do this are so desperate to get love from others. Maybe they were not so loved by their parents or have been taken advantage of a lot of people. They badly want someone to love them so they engage on these kinds of things. However, letting yourself get pregnant for them to stick with you is not the answer. In order to be loved by others, you have to learn how to love yourself. Start with that and I hope everything will follow through.

In my home country there are many single parents. If a girlfriend gets pregnant then the boyfriend might stay or go. The younger the man is the less responsible he will be generally. If a relationship is on the rocks it is not a sensible action to get pregnant. I wouldn't ever do that sort of thing. I think that if I really loved a man I would try to put the sparkle back into mine and his relationship. Early pregnancy can be quite a stressful time with emotional changes and these can test a man's patience.

Women are strong creatures, we don't need a man to help us raise our child. That being said, No I would not use a man for that, nor would I make a man stay if he wanted to leave because of it. Women who use men like that aren't going to keep the man, nor respect for themselves.

no, it isn't. even if the man agrees to be with you and not leave, he will secretly continue pursuing other women, or the love of his life. that would be more hurting, i believe, to discover. a relationship must always have love as foundation. if it is ridden with lies, then it will thrive on lies, and eventually will not succeed. nobody would want a superficial relationship, i bet.

I don't think it can be used as assurance. It depends on the man, if he is willing to marry the woman. Guys now a days cannot be easily blackmailed. I don't think will stoop down to that level I will get myself impregnated and assuming to get the man I love whom I know doesn't or will not love me in return. I will just suffer in the long run if will result to that scheme. Not only me but my child as well. I think it's not love, it's actually obsession, because if you really love someone and you know that person love another person you should be willing to sacrifice and let go.

helo friend , it's not like that the man will never leave you by blackmailing showing the child from from him. If he goes to that worst state to leave a woman with pregnancy, then he can do any dam thing , to get rid off her by showing many excuses.

I don't think that's an assurance that the man will not leave you. I don't think that's right. The woman should not use the baby as a reason to let the man not break up with you. If the guy leaves, then let him. You might think you need him but he doesn't deserve the baby.

I think using a child as a alibi is a bad thing to do because a child is a precious gift of God for us. But i also hear lot of story that a woman is using a child so their partner will not leave them and i think some guy are still leaving their partner because some of them say that they will just give some financial support for the child or they think that the child is not real child..

that's stupid, i think. It's never and assurance. In fact, there have been many cases of single moms lately. My cousin is one of them. it's never right to use a child that way. Children should be made out of love not selfishness. That kind of action is selfishness, and the one to get hurt by it the most is the child esp. if the dad does not want to be dad in the first place or is just forced to be with the woman. As a woman, i'd rather have a man who would willingly go to me than blackmail him to stay with me. blackmails are never good.