Long Distance relationships ?
By kerrina
@kerrina (104)
Canada
November 19, 2011 11:03pm CST
My boyfriend and I have been together for approximately 3.5 years. We lived together with his son for about 3 years in total. Due to financial reasons, we both had to move back in with our parents in completely separate areas. We took this as an opportunity for us to finish up our education we've missed out on too. He's about 8 hours away for me .. Now that he's been gone I've been feeling extremely emotional, frustrated that I can't see him until I finally get a job n afford to see him, and I'm feeling like something's really not right about us being together for some reason ..? Is this something worth fighting for or do you think I should really let go of him and find someone new who would probably best suit me ? I am really confused,, help me please.
10 responses
@chiyosan (30183)
• Philippines
20 Nov 11
hi there kerrina. thinks happen for a reason. sometimes we just have to be separated from our loved ones temporarily but that does not mean we won't be with them for the longest time soon. just hang in thee and always try to talk to your boyfriend, chat, sms or messaging and talking over the phone. I am sure you both can somehow fill the longing by talking to each other.
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
20 Nov 11
i know things happen for a reason but its so hard.. we were together for so long living together too n all n all of a sudden hes just gone n it really sucks.. but i know what we have to do to even get back together and have a better future .. ill do the best i can with him.. its all a matter of time to c whats up with us.
@mmgonzales (882)
• Philippines
22 Nov 11
If you find him best suit you then you should wait for the time to be together...since there are good reasons why you need not to be with him. It is the opportunity for you and him to finished school and become better as a person you could be for each other. I myself experience long distance relationship. During our bf/gf relationship of my hubby now..before only once a yr we were together during christmas time only.. During that time he need to finish schooling and me i am on my work with not only 8 hrs to travel but 36hrs... We want to have a better life together so instead of being negative about it we drive it to be our inspirations.. Hope it goes well with you both..
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
22 Nov 11
you know that kind of gave me a lot more hope. I've heard of long distance relationships giong bad and some going really good. I guess as long as we both pull through then it'll all work out on the end if we really want it to.. And you are right, we both need to finish school really bad. We were so hard up living the way we did and both of us hadn't even recieved and education .. but now that we have the opportunity to im sure we could do much better later on. i CAN'T believe you saw eachother once a year! that would drive me nuts! well i guess if u guys were really really far it would make more sense...
@mmgonzales (882)
• Philippines
22 Nov 11
Actually with the technology now a days we can say that we both very lucky..we can see each other. We can talk, we can give inspirations and hope..but we can only hug a couple of days in a yr. But that would be fine as long as we trust each other, we have faith that we will not be able to do things that will hurt each other of course that we will be faithful...its ok to look but definitely not ok to touch...fragile. c",)
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
20 Nov 11
im doing the best i can .. he just doesnt seem to give a F*** now that were apart. it almost seems like he got happier and gets irritated talking to me so it kinda pisses me off n makes me feel like he dont want me .iunno but it is vital that we get our education goin to support our kid n all .. *sigh
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
20 Nov 11
i was trying to tell him that today when i called him. i told him we need to talk more because before when we were together all the time we would just chit chat away.. n now that its gone, its really awkward to talk onthe phone with him now.. i constantly have to think of questions to ask him n all he says is " yeahyeahyeahhyeah" like its so annoying. he doens't seem to think theres anythng wrong but im feeling it ..
@Hydraloth (185)
• Philippines
20 Nov 11
Based on my experience, i would suggest that you should find someone new because your boyfriend has a child with him and practically saying, its not a good sign because you got to earn not only for you couples but also for the child. So Finding someone who's honest and earning decently is a great choice but before doing that, you must first end your relationship with your present boyfriend but you must end it in a right way and not by disappearing without a word with him.
@chabawel (329)
• Philippines
20 Nov 11
Being away from your boyfriend, has it made you a better, more mature person?
What makes it difficult in your relationship right now? Is it that you don't trust being away from your boyfriend or is it that you are not sure if after you have finished your studies and find work, you might have fallen out of love from your boyfriend?
You have to define what is the reason why you want to move on or end your relationship with your boyfriend.
It is not fair especially with your boyfriend, that your in a relationship but one of you is having uncertainty about it.
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
20 Nov 11
he hasnt been gone that long .. but so far ive been the biggest cry baby in the world (only in my room though when im alone thinking about him) but i guess it would be really beneficial if i gone thru the experience of being a lone all over again so i can live without needing to feel "connected or attached" all the time .. See thats what i mean, i am really scared that by the time i am done school, i would have no feelings left for my boyfriend. as it stands now he feels that im too clingy and he gets irritated when i talk to him. i completely run outta things to talk about .. the connections just NOT there over the phone like it is in real life. when i'd talk to him in person i could go on for hours and hours about things but i try to prolong a conversation to even 1 hour if im lucky.. it really sucks. im frustrated and all i want is communication and it seems like he's not giving it to me and by the time i'll be done there'll be nothin left for him or i coulda found someone else that spent more time with me .. i dont know . i guess i'll c how it plays out
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
20 Nov 11
For me it is good if you have faith and loyalty to each other.
@jagjit273 (1754)
• India
20 Nov 11
Hmmm Kerrina, Your and Mine story is some what same and we both are on losing end.I read all the discussions here.You have done all the same as I did, You Miss him and I Miss her.We did our best for our relationship to keep it going.
Now the question is ,if the other person is not interested in the relationship, shall we still continue to lookout and keep waiting for them.
Shall we Keep on doing our good deeds for them, whether they care for us or not?
Shall we make all the efforts to revive our relationship and get humiliated every time?
My answer Is "NO".Treat the people the way they treat you.
Why I get hurt and cry for her every time.Let her feel the same if she has left any feelings for me and if there are no feelings for me Then why also I waste my time and energy for her.
I know Love makes ourselves weak.But those who come over there weakness are called Brave
So Be Brave and face the life as that person is not the last one on earth for you.
Have a Nice day.
@kerrina (104)
• Canada
20 Nov 11
Like, we were so loving for so long .. yah whwtever we had our fights n all but we were soo inlove even till this day. but now that hes not here i can't feel it no more except when i have really deep, random thoughts about him throughout the day n start crying cuz i miss him n all.. but your right i shudnt have to fight for something if theres only one contributr. its stupid cuz he really doedsnt sound as interested anymore and it really annoying. Im sure he misses me but not as much as i would ever probably miss him :( i dont know maybe he is but in his own way. our personalities can either really clash or really match at times lol. hes kinda emotionless so maybe im just not seeing his side of the way he expresses love to me i guess.. ill keep hanging on till such time.. thank u
