i have given up trying

It seems to me that there is some deep hurt feeling or disillusionment and it has created strained friendship. . Though you have said quite hard, it has not worked out. It is not clear whether it was a direct effort to talk it out or if both had sought some mediation. I can note that you have a desire to save it because there was something good about the friendship that kept you persisting thus far. If that were so and if mediation of a common trust friend or well wisher may help, I suggest you may give it a last try. After all, it may turn out that some uninvolved person giving it all a fair meaning may break the ice and you will both see reason. If it still doesn't work out, there is no point crying over split milk. Just forget & move ahead.

If it does not work. why fix it? That's why we have what we called dump site. That's the place we throw things that we don't use or can't use anymore. Problem is that sometimes we don't know when to let go and when to hold on. As long we think its still good even though its not we don't let go. And chance are that we just wasting our time.

I'm in a similar situation, I just unfriended an old foster sister for her barbs and name-calling, and it seems to me that emotionally I can't handle it anymore. Your mental well-being is very important, and if you have people in your life that'll affect you negatively, then you won't be able to function properly around your family and loved ones. Sometimes tough decisions need to be made.

I don't know what you friend doesn't forgive you for but yes, think about yourself now, YOU TRIED, that's the most important. I even fought for a friend that didn't deserve me. I was there for her for 4 years, even picking up her ridiculous phone calls at 3pm and I never complain, I was like her husband even, even offering to take her and her two kids so she could move out and I would feed her and her kids for a year, exacly! I offered that, I was like a sister, family really, one that she never had. When I needed her, just once after 4 years after the most terrible break up of my life she was buzy, all of the sudden. Okay I forgave her in my heart but of course I got distant. After years she reached me and I couldn't get near without talking about what happened. She offended me, she didn't even discuss, she just lashed me and that was it. She was supposed to be apologizing, she is the most ungrateful person I ever met. I know she never had and never will have a girl friend like me. I don't hold any anger anymore, but pitty. She's a very small person. If someone doesn't forgive us, let them go. If you are trying to make things work and you tried everything I get the feeling you are talking about trying to win a friendship back and the person is not forgiving you. So you deserve better, definitely. Happy MyLotting! I see you are a good friend. Cheers to us good friends. We will find better friends in the future

Is it just about friendship? I somehow do not want to answer this as I do not value friendships but I do value true friends a lot. Friends come and go. If having a friend is so problematic, let him/her go and you will find a new one. Hope you do.

Hi Friend, I know its hard to end friendship but its worth it and relieving... I have a friend at work that ends because of betrayal... Before I can't even think that she can do it to me because I almost treated her as my sister. I even shared all ups and down of my life... Our friendship ends because of this 1 guy friend whom I know is his boyfriend now... Its my EX.. She always in favor with this guy and they even left me alone everyday. Im not angry because of their relationship now, im angry because Im hurt that they end our friendship just like that. Nothing more, nothing less.. I think its betrayal.... Now, Im okey. the friendship that ends was replace by a good one and its more than I can imagine... My new friends is worth it that him and her. Face the truth, if it really wasn't for lifetime friendship, find someone who will be there for you whatever happens. There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything. But its not giving up. Its realizing that you don't need certain people and the nasty things they bring.

sometimes we would feel this way, especially if we have totally lost our hopes, and even our will to live with the people who are the very people who causes our problems. =( when we give up on our friends, that would be the start of us realizing we do not need them...

i also came to the same conclusion that a particular nature people will not be able to get or makeup things work.So its better leave or give up trying.I dont feel sorry for giving up ,becox its something that i can not do.How much i do try its half done.

Hi hotsummer, There are some things in life that you cannot fix no matter how hard you try. So what you can do is let it go and see what happened. We can't control and expect others to be like what we want them to be. So, when things go wrong.. we can either try to fix it or let it be.. I was once in your situation as well. And like you do, I choose to let things be.. I cannot be the way they want me to be. I have my own situation. If they choose to leave me because of this.. I also cannot be the way they want me to be. I believe, friendship means more than that. Friendship is more to understanding and accepting other people as who they are.

Hello hotsummer, I think you have been hurt badly by a friend but yes i understand to end a friendship is tough and painful but then one need to face the fact. It certainly is hard to end it and many times people renew it as they can't live without it. Yes you must try to renew it if you find any hope to revive it as its tough to build friendship than to break it.

hi:) I also given up on some of my friends a couple months ago, because just like you I keep on trying and try to impress them just for them to stay, but I realize even if you tried everything if they don't also give effort then it's useless, anyway if I really matter to them and they treat me as their real friends I'm sure they will find a way to get me back.

I think we need to face the fact. Really we can't please everyone, though friendship is hard to give up knowing that this is true to you.

you have to face reality if you friendship don't go anywere i have same situation whit old friends of my and it hurts but in the end is great i make new great friends and i realise is a wate of time to try to save an old friendship see you soon my friends

Giving up does not mean that you're weak. I'm sorry for what you've lost, but believe that everything happens for a reason and that behind it lies a purpose and a future that is in stored for you and you alone. Just wait, and the perfect time will come for you. Happy MyLotting and God bless you!