Is facebook really worth it?
@Masihi (4413)
Canada
November 22, 2011 7:08am CST
Over the weekend I had a big fight with a former foster sister over something that I made a mistake in. But she continually blamed me after I apologised and accused me of really crazy things and made barbs at me and I eventually blocked her. My former foster family seems to be close-knit, and I'm on the outside. (former foster siblings) I've called my former foster mother and left 2 messages to get some advise and try to calm things down but she refused to pick up the phone or answer any messages and my email. Evidently they all think I"m being childish and stalkish, even when she's the one that's giving me all the insults.
BTW it's only people I know personally that's on my facebook, and I used to be quite active and yes, there are some people who do treat me with respect and I appreciate them but still, it's these drama episodes that bring me down, and with my mental illness I don't think I can handle it. I always end up in a deep depression and I just lay in bed all day for a few days at a time.
I'm starting to think that facebook is bringing the worst out of people.
2 people like this
14 responses
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
22 Nov 11
It's worth it to me because FB is where I fellowship with other believers since there are none near me. I also have family and had problems with my sister and her kids because they are not believers and would make derogatory remarks on my wall. I just left them there and made another FB just for me because I wanted to continue to share, but there was no option of not allowing a friend to comment, it was either all or nothing and that wasn't acceptable.
Since you only peopel you know personally, maybe it isn't worth it to you, but for me, it's a life line, one I need for support for my beliefs. I am sure you understand, having similar beliefs, how I wouldn't get much support here or any teaching at all. Not that some mylot friends are not supportive, but since we can't block or delete comments, it really isn't the place for me to fellowship...
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
22 Nov 11
I'll have to check it out. I have a few favs, mostly because the guy who posts teachings are in them, but one that is opened and for new believers is called, "Messianic Congregation of Facebook Fellowship"
1 person likes this
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
23 Nov 11
Well, facebook is a viral social networking site. Whatever you say to one people in the wall all friends of friends will read it which makes the social network make those people in trouble if they just in that social networking site...
It maybe worth to someone but not to others
1 person likes this
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
28 Nov 11
Masihi, internet must not used that way. We still need to think what must be post in the internet to avoid being misunderstood to others, right.
Knitting,
Public forum is a good to express our feelings. But we need to be careful in what we say because not all of us have a broad understanding in everything we say...
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
Well, it wasn't a viral issue in my case, it's just a former foster sibling overreacting. But still, computer screens only serve to allow people to mouth off what they wouldn't say in your face. Before computers came to popularity, people were generally more polite than they are today.
@knittingpro (289)
• Canada
24 Nov 11
Any public forum makes it easy for people to say what ever they like. I have seen where people I know write things about other people that are down right lies. But you have to know you and your truth. People that are supposed to be adults are bullies it's that simple. You just have to be the better person. That is tiring I know but someone has to do that job! :)
1 person likes this
@knittingpro (289)
• Canada
24 Nov 11
I've met some pretty awesome people on FB. Don't let this situation hold you back from the possibility of doing that same :)
1 person likes this
@Rosa26 (2618)
• United States
23 Nov 11
I am sorry that you are having problems with your family, I hope they give the opportunity to listen your defense.
In my case I only go to FB to know about my family and check my son's FB and his friends activities to monitor him.
But I don't use FB much maybe 15 minutes a day and some days nothing.
So for me FB is good because I save money when I use FB to communicate with my family.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
It's just former foster siblings, I recently reconnected with them and found it's a big mistake. I know she won't work things out anyway and she thinks she's all right. I think I made a good move to block her.
@knittingpro (289)
• Canada
24 Nov 11
I am sorry to hear this is something you have to deal with. Stress is not healthy.
Facebook and even here actually does ruin relationships. FB people get far to involved in the lives of others. When you make a mistake a "I'm sorry" should be enough. It's not for some people. Even if it's family you have to move forward. It's hard but sometimes it's necessary for your own mental health. If your not being treated with dignity and respect then you have to demand it or move on. You can't let people dictate how you feel. We teach people how to treat us and we have to want better.
Inbox me if you want to talk more in depth.
I hope your having a better day!
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
24 Nov 11
Ya, I agree, "I'm sorry" should be enough, but it wasn't so with my former foster sister. I'm usually quick to forgive, unless people keep throwing barbs at me.
This happened a few days ago, so I"m pretty much more calmed down now. MyLot really helps me sort through my emotions. Welcome to our world! 
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
23 Nov 11
Hi Masihi, it's not bringing the worst out of people. It only happens when people starts posting words that creates drama and all those things. Some people in relationships even posted their hate towards each other and that's what makes it worst. Your former foster sister should have called you or spoke to you personally coz this isn't how educated people will do. But these things already happened and I know what you're feeling. Try to just ignore them, sometimes we just feel depressed when we think about what other has to say or thinks about us. You know that you didn't do anything to deserved to be accused of something so I guess the best that you can do is ignore them and move on with your life, be happy with people who loves you.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
I ended up blocking her because she had nothing but abusive words to say to me and about me. I didn't know her well, anyway, I just grew up with her as a kid, and then we just reconneted. Bad mistake.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
23 Nov 11
Those are the kind of people we should not be friends with. Good thing you blocked her. She's insane
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
2 Dec 11
Yes, I have noticed that also. I used to be actively addicted user of facebook but toned it down alot in January of this year when I was having so many medical problems and difficulties. Then before I could bounce back my husband was diagnosed with 2 types of cancer. SO that put me off longer. I am just now these last few days been more active. It can be a drama fest on there. I don't miss the drama at all I have even deleted and blocked family members for their drama and when things cooled off unblocked a few...sighs. Family gotta love them but we don't have to like how or what they do huh?
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
22 Nov 11
You're very lucky, then, I guess I attract the wrong people and they turn ugly and I end up booting them off and stuff. I'm talking about people with issues. That's good that you have mature people on your facebook, though.
@veronizm (907)
• Philippines
25 Nov 11
Yeah, I think it's a waste of time too. At first it was really fun. I enjoy communicating with my friends and family. And people would always comment on my pictures and status updates. But now it seems like it has become a ghost town for me, and I find myself feeling sorry for myself because I don't have likes and comments as much as before. And somehow I find myself kind of jealous of my friends who have jobs and are able to go shopping and travel around the world, etc. It also kinda makes me depress about not having to do what they do which happens to be what I like because I don't have a job and we don't have enough money. I always end up spending my day looking at their profiles and pics and not wanting to work around the house.
I do agree that Facebook can bring out the worst out of people, although I'd have to say that it can also help with communication. It is actually where my mom and I mostly communicate and she can get updates on my baby and see pics of the baby and stuff. I think that's the only thing where I find Facebook useful for me.
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
23 Nov 11
To some people, FB becomes their enemy. It is there where some of their friends would shout out some feelings they wanted expressed and some people would sensitively think that it was they to whom the shout out is being thrown out. Thus, indifference ensues and this is done right there at FB.
For me, i only use it to view the activities of our daughter and my relatives.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
That's just it, people blab anything behind a computer screen what they normally wouldn't say face-to-face.
@gayop2091 (68)
•
23 Nov 11
In my opinion its better for you to have a consultation because your suffering a depression.And its better that would relieved your illness before that would make it worst.And you must have open communication a person whom can be trusted with.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
I'm on the waiting list for therapy, the intake worker said I should be able to the an appointment by the time the new year comes around.
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
22 Nov 11
Well, yes, and I did block the culprits, but the point I'm getting at is that sometimes people hide behind the computer screen and mouth off more. Before computers came along, families were more closer and generally more polite.
@svjomboy (873)
• Philippines
23 Nov 11
me i usually use facebook by chatting my love ones and also friends and family, well on your case all i can advice is just quitely leave and when you think the situation is better try to talk to them again now the issue is still hot. leave it for a few days and see whats happening after. Good luck
1 person likes this
@nat77012 (64)
• United States
22 Nov 11
It depends. But to me I think it's just boring after awhile. It's good for socializing, photo and video sharing, promoting,etc. But sometimes I don't feel like going on it because I'm tired of all the drama, fights, arguments, it's just not necessary. Also, I found out if your applying for a new job, your employer looks at your facebook and can judge you by that. Some people just don't care what they put on their and they don't know who's looking
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4413)
• Canada
23 Nov 11
How can a potential employer look at your facebook if you have strict privacy settings? Nobody can see my wall until they add me as their friend.
