husband or father???

I believe like the Holy Scriptures say that the husband and wife are to become as one flesh. They are supposed to stick together. But her husband is being really pig headed about his father in law. I dont understand why he would want her father to fail.

Wow! What a dilemma your sister might be going through right now. Is there no way she can talk to her husband in not bringing the parents' business down? If the business is illegal then i would be on my husband's side. I wonder why the husband would do that. I need more clarification on this. It's really difficult to choose between the two and i need more facts to decide on this.

if i were in your sister condition, i will try to make my husband understand about my father. i have to make understand my husband, i just dont want to make my relationship will break. so trying the best thing to make them in good condition,

That is really a complicated situation. Your sister loved them both (father and husband) but she should make it a point that what is right should prevail. I think, she needs to talk to her husband alone, and also to her father. After that, she has to weigh things, she doesn't need to choose. Just find time to talk it over and adjust if possible for the good outcome. Families should understand each other and help in any way to build a good relationship to each other. Talking is the key to open up ones heart.

They seems to be other issues between your father and your sister husband. I think they should sort out those issues alone and stop involving your sister in their matter. Otherwise, if I were your sister, I would try to convince them to have a talk and resolve the matter but I won't just divorce my husband because of what my father says.

Hi Ms Asliah i think i choose my Father because if he might here im not here of this word, but i know sometimes we just want parents to be well i lives, and of course i also choose my husband because we love each other and especially he is my husband that we promise to live together forever and if im your sister i choose both and i force them to be okey.

this is a very difficult situation..but for me i choose your father,not because of the wealth it is because the father is only one in this world...you can change your husband but not your father..

Thank Goodness I Am not in this position! but if I was I would tell them to grow up and fix the problem themselves and leave me out of it!

Hi asliah, First of all the the problem is between the father-in-law and son-in-law. It is better for your sister not to take anybody's side. She should love her husband and respect her father. Just advice her to tell to both of them whatever you want to do, do it but don't pull me into it. If you both want to fight over do it but not at the cause of me. Both the father-in-law and son-in-law need counseling. Take them to a family counselor. Happy Living calpro

Put them both on a table and let them settle their things . If the husband loves and cares enough he will let the father or at least talk with him and not put her between. I thin a father will never let her child choose between him and her husband , you are the father and she might be your little girl but she is yet a person that loves someone and want to be with him. So at all when you set it its your fault , so if the father dont care about her daughter and tells her like you are out of my life if you do this ... what father is he ... Another thing its not like they cant survive , do they live entirely on the parents money/house etc ... They are family i think they need to be on their own . But you are just asking what will i do if its me in the possition i never tell someone what to do with their lifes :) I just put some view points :)

I did not get it right what your sister's problem, what is clear is, your sister need to choose between her husband and your father. Asliah, when your sister married his husband they made a vow infront of the Church Minister before God, witnessed by many people that they were not two but one. Likewise, when God instructed "Wives, submit yourselves to your husband as to the Lord. For your husband has authority over his wife just as Christ has authority over the church...(Eph. 5:22-23, Again, when God commanded that "A man will leave his father and mother and unite with his wife, and the two will become one."(Eph.5:31), it means that they should not allow their relationship with their respective parents to become more important, thereby causing fissure in their married life. God bless!

Your sister is in a very difficult situation. Whether we like it or not, our nearest kin is our respective spouse. So legally, your sister has to choose her husband. I just wonder why your father asked your sister to choose between them. It's very rare, a parent trying to disinherit his child just because of the cold relationship between him and his daughter's husband. I guess the best thing to do is to try to settle their differences and it would only be another member of the family who can act as peace maker. Now, it's your sister who can decide on this. She's the one involved. So she has to be careful and be ready for whatever consequences that may arise if ever she can already choose. I should have shared with you regarding my situation with my husband and my father. You know what, if ever I come to a situation like your sister, I would choose my father.

Personally, I think no one should try to divide a husband and wife. Your parents may be upset with your sister's husband.. but they don't have any right to try to manipulate your sister's loyalties. She can love her husband and love her parents at the same time. One would have to wonder what caused the husband to wish the father in law's business to fail? There must have already been bad blood between them... it's probably much bigger than what I am reading here. I think the parents need to back off and mind their business and NOT withdraw their love from their daughter. At the same time, the daughter needs to support her husband and NOT run to the parents for help... they should stand on their own two feet. Your sister shouldn't even need any help from her parents. She is married... so that means she is a grown up and should live as a grown up without asking for parents to give handouts.

wow thats a difficult one...i will choose my family for obvious reasons that ive been with my family for quite longer time rather than with my husband and how will i know that in the future he wont try to hurt my family on other aspects. and besides family will never stab another family member although that is still hard to generalize bec as we see today that doesnt hold true for every family...but i will still choose my family.

Hello asliah, Its really a tough question i would definitely would not like to be in such situation. Why your husband liked to have your father's business downfall?. I think if i would have been in your sister position i would be with my husband and still try to bring my hubby on the right track and a belief that my father will accept me anytime when i will come to him because i am his daughter and its not easy for him to forget it.

I'm not sure if i get what you really mean. For the opinion on choosing between husband and father, it is a very difficult choice to make. In the first place she should not be choosing between them. Her loves her husband and that deserves some loyalty to him. For the father, maybe he is just having his tantrums ,you know. Oldies can sometimes throw themselves into some tantrums if they cannot get what they wanted and they are not aware of it. Her case is the common problem between in-laws. In the case of her husband, he should not mind what the old was saying especially when it is just a sign of his insecurity. Elderly people have several ways of manifesting their insecurities especially if they foresee that they are not as active as before and that they have to let go some important role and position they used to enjoy. She should act as the mediator between her father and her husband but not to choose. Remember, she can't choose her parents but she can choose a husband. And it's not a question of choosing but how to let them meet halfway so that they at least co-exist. Hope this can shed light to your concern asliah.

This is difficult. But what is the reason why your sister's husband want's your dad's business to fall? Are they competitors? If that's the only reason then I think I will have to side on your dad. Why would a good husband wished such situation to happen with his inlaw?

Hi there asliah, That is a very difficult situation if i were to ask.But hear this. my father is my father,no matter what he is doing. My husband , by law and by God's will, OWNS me as his wife. And believe it or not,In the Bible says, "leave your parents and live with your husband,for when you are married you are now become one." My father will forgive me no matter what i choose and i live my life with them so its time that i live my life with my husband.So to me ill choose my husband.

It is really a complicated situation, but if my husband love me, i think he will respect the people I love. I know that in business there are no relatives, but in respect everything will fall in place. Let your sister weigh things and try to talk again to her husband, maybe her husband will realize what he is doing is hurting her wife, and what is money if your loved one is not happy right? :)

i just cant believed her husband can do that to your father. i wish her goodluck im just thankful my husband is not like that immoral