Something i want to talk about :)
By Xansus
@Xansus (946)
Bulgaria
December 10, 2011 3:41am CST
Hello to everyone . I just wanted to share my plans with you but i need to set you a bit back in history for that :D
Well i was with this girl around 4 years and 6 months ago . We were together for like 4 months , my first and only love . Well since then she left me and in the next years we saw each other 1-2 a year and talked with each other 5-6 a yeard (sometimes more sometimes less) . But still every time i see her i feel so happy and because we always hug even though we are friends now i feel something special .
So she left me , she had her reasons and then we were still young . But years pass and i never get her off my head , i have forgoten her for couple of months one time and when i saw a good looking girl , she instantly popped in to my head .
So last new year we celabrated together with friends . And i was so happy and somehow lucky that we drinked a bit and somehow i ended up huging her for couple of hours , really made my life worth something , but well it was just that .
Later on we just talked about thing and love and everything and somehow it ended up in way she says : its not that i dont have feeling its just that they are not enough . I as for myself only see her and love her , and i know what she ment by that . She went to study in other country now and maybe she want to live there , because my country is poor and all. But some months ago she said she lost the silver bracelet i gifted to her when we were together , and now i have an idea .
I plan on going to see her for christmas , simply hug and tell her that i still and will always love her . Give her a new gift , ofcours a silver bracelet , because she lost the one thing that maybe reminds her of me and i dont want to be forgoten by the only person i love and always will . I plan on writing a letter , but there i have a lot of thinking , i jsut want to share everything that i feel , but with letter will not be enough but i will try , still i dont want to force her in any way or tell her what to do , but i still want to have an effect . But i see some other points , the distance will be too much , but somehow i love her more then enough to be alright with it ... for now . I did not let her go from i let her go to become a better human and do what she likes .
There are not simply things i want to ask here , just to share and maybe someone will throw some opinion that i want to see how it looks from different point of view .
1 person likes this
3 responses
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
10 Dec 11
You are forcing her into something if you show up on her doorstep in her new life. I don't think she will like that. I also think you will be hurt very badly.
She told you, you are not the one. She likes you as a friend but you will not be her lover or boyfriend or husband.
You better open your eyes and go on with your life.
She started all over again, a new life, new friends. You are a friend from the past.
@Xansus (946)
• Bulgaria
10 Dec 11
Well you are most probably right , but the problem is i did try to like you said open my eyes and well there was around a 4-5 month i did not even remember her , but later remembered her .
Well i think i have problem here not her and well people are right to tell me let go , but if i let go i better die . I really dont find anything better in my life , well i mostly live because of my parents , but i dont see anything else worth enough in my life .
People say you should never give up on your dreams .. what to do when this is my dream ? (and dont tell me let go because i tried that and it did not worked )
@SpikeTheLobster (6403)
•
10 Dec 11
You're not going to like my opinion. 
She's made her position VERY clear: "its not that i dont have feeling its just that they are not enough". She's not interested. This is just another way of saying "I like you but not in THAT way" which just about every nice guy in the world has heard a dozen times!
In short, give it up. Stop. If you want to give her a bracelet, that's fine but it'll be a mark of friendship and nothing more.
Don't waste your time pursuing someone who doesn't want you because, even if she said "yes", you would be a second choice, a safe bet, the backup plan. And you deserve better than that. We all do.
She's made her position VERY clear: "its not that i dont have feeling its just that they are not enough". She's not interested. This is just another way of saying "I like you but not in THAT way" which just about every nice guy in the world has heard a dozen times!
In short, give it up. Stop. If you want to give her a bracelet, that's fine but it'll be a mark of friendship and nothing more.
Don't waste your time pursuing someone who doesn't want you because, even if she said "yes", you would be a second choice, a safe bet, the backup plan. And you deserve better than that. We all do.@Xansus (946)
• Bulgaria
10 Dec 11
No its not about not liking , i know some of these from long time age , but somehow as the time passes this is not so short time passed until now , maybe i might be happy with being a backup plan , but i do know its wrong in a way , but the "but" never stops :)
Well i'm not expecting anything now , its just that i want to show her that i still have this , the bracelet is because i want her to have something from me , because as i said she said she lost her last one . But about expectation i dont have much , for this time i realize a lot of things and it will be hard , but because i do still love her more then anything i just cant simply let her go .
Well lots of people told me to let go but it was impossible for me :)
Well its not going to have an some effect so its mostly a gift i'm giving , but lets hope one day i find some other and better girl :)
But its not about liking , but here is more of understanding :)
@davaome (1826)
• Philippines
10 Dec 11
Did you guys talk about your personal lives after your break up? does she have someone new in her life? make sure to answer this questions first before you go because it would be an epic fail if you would continue without knowing these,
But i really admire your action, and I believe, I would do the same thing 
. you Should give it your all, so that you won't go asking yourself, "what if?".
atleast by doing you would never have any regrets.
I wish you luck my friend
. you Should give it your all, so that you won't go asking yourself, "what if?".
atleast by doing you would never have any regrets.
I wish you luck my friend@Xansus (946)
• Bulgaria
10 Dec 11
We discuss about everything and i always am honest as i think she is . And for now she dont have anyone , but you know sometimes love is a fight you have to win , and even if there is someone i decided already this will be something i want to do . But if i knew she have someone i would have stoped , but she dont .
Well thanks :)
