A hardheaded friend:/

@bestie (3272)
Philippines
December 16, 2011 2:15am CST
What will you do if a friend ask you for an advise yet she doesn't even consider taking it?Indeed when you give advise to others it doesn't necessarily mean that they will follow it,they may consider it but not all the time.The fact that you help them brighten up their minds is enough.But in my case recently it feels so bad that she took my advise for granted.She don't eve listen,she's deeply hurt but still keeps on pretending there is nothing wrong.All the time she's being pretentious but if we're alone she reconciles her feelings how she's hurt.I don't know what to do with her situation anymore but I'm still on her side only that I don't anymore speak a single word of advise to her coz she will still not listen to it... too bad!!!
8 responses
@davaome (1826)
• Philippines
16 Dec 11
I think she wants you to pity her, she just want your comfort, but not really for your advice but so that she can justify herself or something, which is somehow selfish of her. This is just my opinion on this but I think she is like that. She has much pride. I know she is your friend, but you have to put some sense into her, she can't be that way forever. If this continues and it is about boyfriend issues, she will often lose her boyfriend. I know it's ok that they don't take your advise and it's not your decision to make, but it is a friends duty to suggest what we think is best.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
11 Apr 12
There will always be "that" friend who doesn't listen. But what else can we do?We have to accept them for what they are and respect each other's differences. But if you come to a point of getting tired, better let her know what you feel,rather than just keeping it by yourself. You have been a very good friend to her and she's lucky to have you.
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
Could it be that she is hiding a point that bear more weight than your advice? In that case, she knows what she is doing and will have to ask if she don't have a clue on something. It is generally useless to teach if they already know what to do.
• Japan
18 Jan 12
if I had a friend like that asking me some advice and me as friend wasting my saliva and tongue telling her the advices and she wont listen then I would just prolly stop giving her advices,instead I would just tell her to do what makes her happy! I don't want a friend who want you to pity her and asking advices and wont listen tsk tsk tsk
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
18 Dec 11
I won't call it 'hardheaded' maybe just confused. I have a very very close friend who is confused too about one situation. And I've given a lot of advise but seems like all my advises won't matter or be followed at all. I felt what you feel, but somehow I learned to understand we cannot make people follow our advise because it is their own problem and they have their own mind. No matter how good our advise are, it will always depend on them whether to do it or not. And maybe we cannot blame them. If we are in that position maybe we can be strong in facing it.. or we can be 'hardheaded' like they are too. It's hard not to say anything when we started talking about the same matter over and over again, so I try to understand both sides of her confusion. I just learned that it's best not to force/advise someone to tell what s/he has to do. It's better to just listen and give fair judgment on the good and bad side of a situation.
• Philippines
17 Dec 11
There are people who are like that. It is really difficult to deal with that person. What is good in you is that you choose to stay at her side despite what she is doing with your advice. I think as of the moment you just have to continue understanding her until she will come to listen to the advice you are giving to her.
• India
16 Dec 11
Friends are always friends. We need to handle them right and make our life more colourful. In friendship there is nothing like hardheaded or nothing.
@heartbit (237)
• Philippines
16 Dec 11
i have that kind of friend who wouldn't listen. so i told her that if its the same topic she wants advise, do not ask me. she still have her problems and i really do not understand why she won't listen and i just don't want to frustrate myself forcing my advise to her. now we still get along fine.