How do you deal with a Breakup?
By AshwinSajith
@AshwinSajith (602)
India
December 23, 2011 7:44am CST
All of us have been there sometime or other. The time when we feel that the most important person in our lives has just gone away and the whole world is crumbling around us. But, people have different ways of dealing with a breakup and get normal agian.
So how do you deal with a breakup? Do you sit and sulk and be depressed forever or move on quite quickly? How long does it take you to completely get over your ex -partner? Do you still sometimes think/ get feelings for your ex?
1 person likes this
6 responses
@Aja103654 (5644)
• Philippines
24 Dec 11
From what I remember, I did not sulk at all, in fact, I wanted to go out and be with everyone else(except my ex, of course) It was a hard time to get over my grudges against my ex. I hated him, abhorred him! It was during the last few months before I graduated from high school. Instead of thinking of my pathetic ex, I focused on school grades, making them higher than ever. I topped almost all the test, people were in awe. I used my anger, to prove to others that no one can bring me down, even when I have heartaches, I can still move on, stronger than before.
I think about my ex, imagining him miserable without me, I have no idea what is happening to him now, I just wish that he won't fool other girls and do something better with his life. Any feelings of affection and love are gone.
1 person likes this
@Aja103654 (5644)
• Philippines
31 Dec 11
Yes, hehe, well it wasn't easy. I try to make up for being weak physically by being strong emotionally. I think everyone should not let break ups get to them and ruin themselves in the process. We take challenges like that to make us better people and stronger, not some messed up loser who everyone would pity. I think it was pride that helped me at the time, now I have to get rid of that pride, because it's not good.
Not everyone can move on quickly though, each person has his or her own pace.
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
25 Dec 11
Hmmm great for you Aja103654.. Yo really are one of a kind as only very few of them can move on quickly and the rest of us just lose focus and become really sad totally affecting us and the people around us for a while.. I am also happy to hear that you did not let the breakup affect you anyway and infact used it to come out as a better and stronger person..Kudos to you :)
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
26 Dec 11
Hmmm as you said time is the best healer and when you let time run its course it will for sure make you forget.. But as you said the sadness and the loneliness will remain unless you meet someone new and interesting.. It will be difficult to open yourself up once again to another person , but once you do it you have just moved on.
@for3verfamous (2190)
• Canada
23 Dec 11
If it was someone you truely loved, it's impossible to just move on quickly. The instinct you have when you break up with someone is normally to sit at home, eat, and cry. For me, when I broke up with my boyfriend, I had no choice but to keep going to work. It actually helped because it took my mind off it for a bit everyday.
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
23 Dec 11
Hmmm as I had earlier said keeping the mind occupied and not thinking about it for a while is probably the best way to go about it. They say time is the best healer but I dont think even time can heal some scars left by the breakup if you were extremely close as the mind keeps wandering to the good times.
@faceless_girl (366)
•
23 Dec 11
take life as book and time as a chapter , when you end any relationship and sure that this is actual end then think u finish the chapter and time move on to another one. life is not complicate bt we make them ourselves . hope you will pass this harsh time dr . best of luck
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
24 Dec 11
Wow very well said and there was a lot or poetic quality to your post.. Well if it was that easy there wont be bookmarks right? The chapter might have been over but your mind will create an artificial bookmark making you go back and remember :)
@nezavisima (7408)
• Bulgaria
23 Dec 11
each of us bear the separation difficult.
some cry and some suffer very severe.
but life does not end.
I know I've suffered but then everything is as old memories.
this is just normal and temporary until you meet a new love.
most important thing is to remain friends not to divide as enemies.
success.
nice day!
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
25 Dec 11
Thanks for your mature reply nezavisima.. I totally agree with the fact that you move on completely only when you meet someone else who will be a tonic to your earlier troubles.. But I really find it difficult to be friends with my ex.. We may not be enemies but we can never be friends either as there is a lot awkwardness. Cheers for a wonderful reply.. Happy Mylotting
@bubuth (1815)
• Philippines
23 Dec 11
When im just went to break up its hard for me to move on. It takes a month or a year before i can move on. Honestly, i need a new partner before i can move on until i learn to love my self and now its easy for me to move on without finding new one. I try to enjoy my self with my friends when i feel alone.
@AshwinSajith (602)
• India
23 Dec 11
Well I agree with the fact that friends play an important part in helping you get over this tough time.. When one of my friends had a tough break up after 8years she was in a state of complete depression because spending 8 years with a person is a lot and they were practically like a married couple.. So when it happened it really hit her hard and a group of us took it upon us to make her normal.. It really did wonders to her and she has moved on now and is very happy :)