stinks!

@emdjay23 (1575)
Philippines
December 25, 2011 2:54pm CST
Hi guys, I just want to ask, do you tell somebody or a friend that something is wrong with her such as her breath stinks or he/she has body odor.. How do you say it to them without hurting his/her feelings?
6 responses
@francesca5 (1344)
26 Dec 11
i have never tried this, but i suspect a lot of hygiene problems are caused by other issues, like people who don't look after themselves and keep themselves clean are probably feeling depressed, and certainly thinks like bad breath can be caused by stress. so, and i have to say i have never tried this so i have no idea if it would work. but i might ask them if they are feeling ok, and show some concern for the person's welfare, and then you might identify why they are having this problem, rather than just making them feel worse by telling them they smell.
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
There was this one time during our class way back college, we were discussing about body odors, then our professor told us that she will smell each one of us, because as for our Nursing course it is required that you must have good hygiene. then suddenly that friend of ours just disappeared, maybe she knew but we just couldn't bear to hurt her..
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
well I guess I will just have to figure out some ways to tell her.. I know that she knew.. maybe she doesn't know how to change it..:)
26 Dec 11
that would suggest that she knows, at some level or other. perhaps she is aware she doesn't take enough care of herself, and her personal hygiene. its a very difficult problem, but i wouldn't be surprised if her lack of care for herself was something to do with not feeling good about herself. i wish you luck with solving this problem.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
So far, I never had any smelly friend. But if there is one I think I would find it really difficult how to say it as I wouldn't want to hurt my friend's feelings. And that depends on the level of friendship we have too. If the friend I have is just new - I think it's more difficult to say it to him/her. But if I am friends with the person for years already then I won't mind telling it to him/her. As I know my friend will think it's just for his/her best.
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
Exactly, this friend of mine was just new, we were planning to tell it to her we did some open forum together with some of my friends. one of my friends made some statement that she doesn't want to smell some body odor from her friends, we thought she made clear on it, but after a while she still smell bad.. and it worsen everyday..I hope sooner or later we can resolve it..
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
27 Dec 11
Maybe she's not aware that she has the smell... you can tell it to her privately. No other friends around. It would be really offending if everyone will tell it to her, she might lose confidence. Better you tell her that you are smelling somehting from her and that she should use deodorant so she won't smell bad.
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
27 Dec 11
I was just wondering if she knew all about it why can't she change it or correct it..does she needs someone to tell it to her.. We are planning to tell it to her sooner, we just couldn't find ways to start a conversation..:)
@celticeagle (167070)
• Boise, Idaho
27 Dec 11
Well, I would find the right time to say something. Maybe say something to the effect of how good a friends you are. That you can tell her/him anything. The just say it and tell the truth. Tactfully laying it out as lightly as possible. Surely they would rather know from you rather than from others.
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
27 Dec 11
ok.. Thanks, this time I will try even if it hurts her.. I am just afraid that maybe telling that to her lowers her self esteem, but I guess I should not jump into conclusions until I told her what is wrong.. Thanks
1 person likes this
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
28 Dec 11
I know.. that's why I've decided to tell her the truth.. Thanks to all of you..
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (167070)
• Boise, Idaho
28 Dec 11
I think that telling her the truth with some tact does her alot more good in the long run.
@wulania (1524)
• Indonesia
26 Dec 11
in the school where i work, we have a friend who have such problem. we feel bad when we smell the odour crom from his body (when he has sweet so much. oneday, when we had a meeting, and the vice principal hd a general announcment (not personally intended) that all teacher must have good smell, and the school will buy rexona if we wont buy it using our money. and it worked
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
Its good that your principal did the initiative to tell it in public and pertaining it as a whole.. I guess for its kinda hard to tell it to my friends face because I am afraid that I might hurt her feelings.I just wanted to help her but I could find any way to tell her.
28 Dec 11
i usually keep silent.. all my friends seem don't bother about this situation either..if i am around that people, i just keep a small distance if we talk..
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
30 Dec 11
I usually keep silent also, but sometimes silence won't really help.. but being frank are the toughest..:)
25 Dec 11
i have same problem like you even i wanna tell them to do something about this problem but i cant because they will get hurt and may be they will misunderstand my feelings, so i dont tell them about this,, ya but i can tell my close friend about this.
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
25 Dec 11
I also have this close friend, she's beautiful all all, but its just that she has all the bad odor in her body.. one of my friends asked me if i am smelling it, we really wanted to tell it to her, but it felt very awkward to say it to her..we just don't know where to start or when.. until now were still figuring out how to tell it to her without even offending her or hurting her feelings..
26 Dec 11
you all friends together should tell her about this, and tell her genuinely about the fact and after that make her smile i hope she will not mind..
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
we are planning to tell it to her..we just couldn't find time right now because of holiday season.we were just scared that we might hurt her feelings..I am just crossing my fingers to it..:)