What a Big Problem!
By anonymous_5
@anonymous_5 (16)
Philippines
January 2, 2012 5:20am CST
i want to carry out suggestions on the situation i am in right now.. what must i do? i'm really desperate now... i have my boyfriend and his love seems to fade that he don't love me anymore.. i can't give him up as i really love him that much though we really have problems regarding our situations and family. my parents don't like him and he said to me that he woke up one day that he realized that he does not love me anymore that my parents don't want him and we must stop being together, that he's tired and he does not know why he don't love me anymore unlike before that he does everything and when i said everything.its really everything. but now, he wants to give me up.we had a promise that i'll make him fall inlove again in a range of time.we are in a long distance relationship and he gets mad at me whenever i am persistent especially if he's busy at studying.i'm worried because he's starting to like someone else.when i asked him why not me, he answered me that he's tired of every problem that we have,that we keep everything about us in secret,that my parents don't want him,that i can't make him happy anymore that's even the reason why he doesn't love me anymore..because he's not happy anymore on me..what do i do to make him happy?what do i do to make him fall in love head over heals again to me..i really need good suggestions because i can't stand to still have a relationship on him while not making him happy..though i never want to give him up..i'll never let him go, no matter what.. i just want to know ways for him to make his feelings back for me.we could spend time together temporarily after 3 mos. because he'll have his OJT at my area but its only for summer. when our last year of education comes, we'll be back for being on long distance. and i can't make him go to me at one instant like before, i need to plead him to be able for him to go to me and see me.. what do i do now? please help me guys.. i just want him back, not only our relationship, not only him but the WHOLE him.. including his heart.. i want his heart back..we still have our relationship, i still have him and no other woman can have him until our promised date of letting him go.. i still have 2 years to make him fall in love with me..he promise not to talk to any other woman except me unless its really important..please help me have his heart back... :'(
1 person likes this
2 responses
@5mahi05 (666)
• India
2 Jan 12
hello friend, your post tells how desperate you are in getting him back to your life. Yes, i will give you some suggestions. First of all the things, please don't push the guy too much to be with you. Stop begging him. This doesn't work with guys. And the other important thing is, don't resist him from speaking to other women because, guys don't like this sort of behavior from girls. He shouldn't feel that you are controlling whom he should speak to! This will also make him think that you don't trust him, which in turn will make him think that there is no love without trust and start moving away from you. Other than these, rather than asking him not to leave every time you speak to him, just be a good friend to him. Try to understand his situation too. His problem is very clear in your relationship. He is just not ready to hide your relationship for the rest of your life. Which means, he would stay with you, if there are ways that you both could live together happily forever. You have 2 years which means it is a very long time. You can wait for sometime before you can start speaking to him about making some ways to get that most needed affirmation from your father. Use this time to convince your father. If you could do this, then half of your work is already done.
Don't worry too much and make any nasty decisions. Your boyfriend is just feeling insecure about his future with you. That is why he is trying to go away from you. If your dad accepts him, then he will be with you as you wish. Other than that, give him some time to think about it. He has just experienced a rejection from your father and it will take some time for him to recover from that. Give him that time instead of pestering him all the time to be back with you. But, just stay with him. Stand beside him and give your support silently and ensure him that everything will be alright and you both will succeed anything if you are working together on it. Make him to trust you first. After that, i am sure things will be fine.Never stop loving him and never stop trusting him. At the same time, never pester him too much or force him to do anything. This will be a problem for you only
Even after all this, if he really thinks that he doesn't really feel that love fofr you again, then it is wise to let him go. There is no point in bringing back a person forcefully. You will get the WHOLE him except his Heart. So be wise and act accordingly. Letting off the person is also love sometimes, because you are doing it for his happiness. Instead of being together and making things hell for both, you can let him go and at least see him live happily with whom he think he will be happy. I am sure this is not that easy, but there isn't really anything that time can't heal. You will eventually be out of it after some time knowing that it wasn't your fault that it din't work for you both.
@anonymous_5 (16)
• Philippines
2 Jan 12
i trust him but he honestly said to me when i ask him to have a choice, he said that he'll be choosing that someone whom he likes than getting back at me.. he honestly said that he does not love me anymore,.. and as i have said, we were on a long distance relationship and i couldn't stand beside him everytime even though i want to.. i don't really want to give him up as he's the best man i've ever met and he's my first boyfriend..he is the best and i don't think i could find any other man that could be better than him, he's the man of every woman's dreams when he still loves me..really.. i love him that much that i can't really give him up and i know i'm being real selfish by this.. i don't want him to talk to other women as i would just making an opportunity or a chance for him to fall in love with others, i'm asking how to make him fall inlove with me again not fall to others! and he'll be talking to other girls than talking to me if i permit him to talk with them and take note that these women are near him and they are in the same class.. that's why i can't really have it.. i want to make him happy but i don't know what to do..i really want him to fall for me..again...
@anonymous_5 (16)
• Philippines
2 Jan 12
oh.. and i don't really have problems when it comes to figure and face.. i really have the guts.. i also tried to be with other men but i just really can't.. he's really the only one.. not to be rude but i'm pretty--as many people are saying yet no one tells me i'm ugly-- (no one yet..) and as for him he tells me to find other men and that i am really capable of doing because of my looks plus the figure and the skin type.. i'm not that skinny but my figure will not have a shame for having 2 piece.. i just really want suggestions to have him back.. if someone would try to think of my appearance.. its really not the problem.. though i'm not so sure.. i really want to have him back... :'( i'm that desperate..really...
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
2 Jan 12
I think the best advice is to let him go. I have had a relationship where the guy was ready to move on and the biggest mistake I did was to try and "keep" him. If he was meant to be, then he'll come back to you, if not, and I know it really hurts, but you just need to forget about him and move on..