Gossip isn't all bad... what do you think?
By Lhenni
@Lhenni (1242)
Philippines
January 24, 2012 1:34am CST
I just read it in the web that gossip can be bad that we tend to overlook that it can be good as well because it is driven by concern for others and has positive social effects.
Still and all, I think, all of us don't want to be a behind-the-back talk of the town.
2 people like this
19 responses
@5mahi05 (666)
• India
24 Jan 12
It is something which is not healthy to speak about others at their back. I believe that, if you do not have that guts to speak about someone in front of them and speaking the same at their back, it proved nothing but you are wrong. Else why would you not speak the same in front of the other person.
But interestingly, studies prove that, a girl relives off her stress by gossiping. May be with little easy going things which are light hearted one's are fine, but serious gossips are very bad.
2 people like this
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Even if we have guts to talk about it in front of the subject I think is unethical. I can do such in my close realtives or to my very closest friends that I think will welcomes what I think and my advices.
I just read it in the web and I post it here for some views...
Thanks for sharing 5mahi05. Cheers!
@lekhya (819)
• India
24 Jan 12
I do that..but i feel its bad.
Talking something bad about someone in their absence is definitely not right.But we can't prevent ourselves from doing that.We want to point out at others..and that we can't do infront of them as we don't have the guts.Though its driven by concern for others,y would one show only negative concern for others.Y can't we leave aside the person's negative shade and talk about his positive ones.Our minds always linger around one's negative aspects and want to talk and discuss about them until we are completely satisfied...
2 people like this
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Like you, I think it's bad too to talk someones negatives on their back because we have no guts to talk about it infront of them *LOL
Seriously, gossipers tend to break some rule of being modest. For whatever reasons they had, still it is offesive to talk someone at their back. But as you've said, which I agree, that we can't prevent ourselves in doing so, let's just be discreet not to hurt someone's feeling to the best we can :p
Happy day lekhya!
@donsky14 (5947)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
If its done because of concern for others...then it wouldn't be called a "gossip".
According to the dictionary:
Gossip is a: Casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true.
So for me, gossip is never really good. Specially if your the one being gossiped about.
1 person likes this
@sabado_dc (1001)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
It is better for us to understand, donsky if you did not include your first sentence.
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@beamer88 (4259)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
I guess it could have some good points if the concern behind the gossip is sincere. I know that happens when we talk of someone who's, say, having problems. But the problem with gossips is that almost always the truth is twisted somehow. Or that the facts are either lacking or in excess of what actually is happening to someone. Well, I mean, the intent of the gossiper may be good, but the outcome of it could be bad.
2 people like this
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
Yes beamer! I think, along the gossip way, it will somehow break some rule of decency and intentional or not it will bring negative to the person. And in many cases, the subject will not then like what's happening... then it's war! *sigh! And I don't want to involved in such... I think all of us beam!
It's really not a good idea to gossip someone if we can't assure that we will be responsible in what to think and say and happen if the subject knew she was being talked...
@alberello (4752)
• Italy
24 Jan 12
If you want to know my opinion, I also believe that the gossip are not bad.
In fact, this term refers to a series of indiscreet conversation deemed inappropriate or against other people. Gossip happens when two people communicate with each other in real life, in a real place, without the intermediation of a means of mass communication.
Having said this, then everyone is free to think their way!
1 person likes this
@sabado_dc (1001)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
Alberello,
hehehe!
What a coinciding opinion between me and you because I am not interested to talk about people; I am only interested to talk personal things between me and the one sitting beside me, in a real place, without any parties involved other than the two of us...
That does make sense, really!
1 person likes this
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
Me and a guy best friend were gossiping about our girl best friend last night. But we don't see it as a bad gossip. We talked about the things that concerns her. The things that like for her and we will say to her once we spoke to her about her life and her decisions. That we should accept whatever it is that she decided and that we should try to understand her. It's still a gossip for me because the person was not there, I think as long as our goal is to help her or give her a a piece of advise it won't be considered as a bad gossip.
I don't wanna be the talk of the town too so I think I deserve to know what things they are talking about me. This is what we did last night, she will know every thing once we see her.
I don't wanna be the talk of the town too so I think I deserve to know what things they are talking about me. This is what we did last night, she will know every thing once we see her.2 people like this
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
Brainstorming *LOL! What a nice! I did that also with my very good friends and I don't think it's wrong if the purpose was right *wink!
Sometimes, we need some advices from a friend outside the situation who see some clear vision than we can alone. And sometimes too, it helped us if someone will tell us what's going on outside that we tend not to know.
Concerning to a friend can be positive if the friend welcomed those.
Hoped for a positive result when you see her En.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Gossip is actually talking about other people's personal life and has always been with negative connotation. I can't really figure out what positive effect gossip has. I for one would not want my personal life to be talked about so I doubt if anyone wants to be the center of gossip unless he or she is a celebrity who believes good or bad publicity is good.
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Hi salonga!
Maybe the web wrote that, to just justify the gossiper that I think the author herself is one of them *LOL
Well, likewise, I hardly find the concerning factor it may bring but in some point I can say maybe yes, there is!
But overall, it's a no no! We should not talk someone at their back because we don't want that to happen to us also. A good riddance!
@clairie0411 (199)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
I think gossip is bad. If we want to say something or we want to help, we must go directly to the people involved and not talk about them and what they should do or should have done instead.
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
I agree clairie. Likewise, It's really bad to gossip someone at their back. Say, you have good reason for doing so, but to the main subject maybe it's another.
Better be watchful because we don't know it's us who are now the talk of the town. And we don't like it happen to us *sigh!
@gelayagui98 (1336)
• Australia
25 Jan 12
Hi Lhenni, Gossips make the world go round! lol. according to old sayings... if there is smoke there is fire. Even how beautifully constructed the words still called it gossip when passed to one person from the others but we should not that hypocrite not doing this because this is norm in our community the only thing we should avoided is to destroy person's life by way of gossiping. The best thing to do might be is just hear it better not commented back to the issue in order not to make the issue huge. The truth, I stay all time at home but i am aware of what is happening in our community because my stay-out maid's the one who feed me issues, lol. God bless everyone!!!!
1 person likes this
@Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
I'm a homebody too. Prefer to always be indoor than outdoor *LOL. I got updates or common known as gossip from my friends in FB, that's why I'm not into FB these days.
Sometimes when I buy in the sari-sari store near us my neighbor tells me what's been happening inside our subdivision because I'm not used to attend the home-owners meeting. Sometimes, I find the talk in good sense but mostly non-sense because it ended on some people around. I just smiled back and when I got my change I go away.
I don't like gossiping too in the sense it goes judgemental. But I do hear those *LOL... and if I crave for some I opted to open a site for celebrities *LOL. But most of the times, I want the current events. I want to be updated to what's happening in the country and to the world. It's more full of shocking! It's more senseful to deal those news huh.
But I can't deny too that I find some light gossiping about known people in my circulation quite intriguing but I stay away to degrading phase in talking.
@Triple0 (1904)
• Australia
25 Jan 12
Well yes gossip does involve us talking about others and showing our concern about them but it isn't concern when you're bad mouthing them behind their back. 
I tend to associate gossiping as something bad when we talk about bad stuff of others. Usually in my experience, my friends like to bad mouth each other, sometimes we talk about our friend in concern but of course there will be a bit of bad mouthing thrown in there, saying how she is like this and why she is acting that way. Like you said, no one wants to be talked about behind their backs in casual conversation. It kinda hurts when you catch them talking about you
I tend to associate gossiping as something bad when we talk about bad stuff of others. Usually in my experience, my friends like to bad mouth each other, sometimes we talk about our friend in concern but of course there will be a bit of bad mouthing thrown in there, saying how she is like this and why she is acting that way. Like you said, no one wants to be talked about behind their backs in casual conversation. It kinda hurts when you catch them talking about you @Lhenni (1242)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
It's not only the hurt feeling but the declaration of war to the concerning people *sigh! Oh I know that Triple and all was a sad story and misunderstanding and dividing!
I've been in a big group of friends when I'm still working and I encountered all those craft gave by gossiping. It's really bad to gossip someone that if you knew you're being talked too you will give more than what it should takes knowing that you're doing it also to your fellow.
As the saying goes: Don't do unto other's what you don't like other's do unto you.
Well, if all of us practice this, it's gonna be a harmony!
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
25 Jan 12
hi lhenni, the thing about gossip is that its can sometimes be
very hurtful and negative...and how do one seperate the truth
from the non truth...
I just think its wrong all around to gossip about anyone or any
thing...It could unjustifiably injury the good reputation of another,
like slander or the sort....
There have been deaths/sucides because of gossips...destructive
behavior from someone else...
I don't like it and I try to stay far away from it....
1 person likes this
@sabado_dc (1001)
• Philippines
24 Jan 12
Bad because in decreases deeds and increases evil ones leading to dishonor(ism) and ignomin(ism)
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@cttolledo (5454)
• Legaspi, Philippines
25 Jan 12
Whatever will be the effect, good or bad... for me it is still not good hobby..
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@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
hello Lhen,
Gossip will always be bad.
Partly it may give some warning to the concern, but,if the concern person is really concern- why gossip instead of telling it to the concern directly.
Yes,-truth hurts, or we might hurt that person, so be it-at least we never talked at her/his back.
@megamatt (14291)
• United States
25 Jan 12
Well the problem is that gossip tends to get out of control rather quickly. Something that starts rather harmless to say the very least, or something that starts rather truthful gets spread. As gossip tends to gets spread, from person to person, there are times where people are rather going to put their own spin on the gossip, each and every time, until it just slides right into something rather different.
Unfortunately gossip does seem rather harmless until it affects you. And often times, something rather common and decent, not that bad, can turn into an alarming bit of news. When something gets filtered right through the gossip chain, eventually it is going to blown up a lot of the time and that is sadly something that will in fact happen often.
@sjvg1976 (41290)
• Delhi, India
24 Jan 12
Hello Lhenni,
Gossips are bad
but its natural as whenever people meet they tend to talk about others but the only thing we must not do is it may not hurt a person for which we talked if he/she comes to know about what we said about him/her
.I don't gossip much as i feel its waste of time but whenever i do have leisure time i can't resist doing it.
but its natural as whenever people meet they tend to talk about others but the only thing we must not do is it may not hurt a person for which we talked if he/she comes to know about what we said about him/her.I don't gossip much as i feel its waste of time but whenever i do have leisure time i can't resist doing it.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
24 Jan 12
Personally I don't see any kind of concern in gossip. It's always to make other look bad or worse or how you want to call it. It never has to do with being concerned. There is seldom a part of truth in the story, most of it is made up and evy plays a very big part in it as well.
Making up stories has nothing to do with being concerned and sharing your concern with others. It has to do with putting yourself in the centre of all attention by making others look bad in the eyes of the public/society.
The worst thing of all is that many people believe the gossip. It never will stimulate anyone to give a hand/help out because they are concerned about the subject his/her feelings/situation.
If you talk about someone or share with someone your concern and you stick to the facts this is not what I call gossip. Also people who do so will not suddenly stop talking if you show up and they will also tell you (the subject) they are concerned about you.
1 person likes this
@sayo13 (414)
• India
24 Jan 12
hi Lhenni i would love to put forth my opinion to this matter.
well gossip to certain extend is good as you need to be analytic and evaluative to the happenings around you.
we genarally do gossiping with others and about others ,well that help you to even extract more information from them and at the same time you will be confirmed of the other's opinions and views.
but from the other side if you view it its really not worthy time pass you can say.as you say that its a wastage of time and energy in talking about other;s life and matters,giving them unnecessary importance which they might not deserve at all.
so everything within a limit is always welcome.after-all gossiping the girl's favorite time pass!! being a girl i can understand that.
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