Does Single Means Miserable?
By xien2xien
@xien2xien (1382)
Philippines
January 24, 2012 2:11pm CST
Being single fits me but lots of my friends are saying that maybe i'm bitter maybe i'm miserable and sad after all, i always told them i'm fine yet they always thinks im not, i'm just living my life to the fullest i have my own life my own time my own freedom from anything and anyone.
In my circle of friends im the only one whose happy being a single some of my friends whose alike my status are spending day and night to find someone to become their partner, they can't live without a relationship at all, after they broke up with their last i'll just count some days then you can see them with someone new.
They might think i'm a little abnormal for wanting this kind of life and that i'm wanting to live miserable and alone, but i might also say that they were the one whose miserable, cause they don't know how to give the real love and they don't know the meaning of true love, since they can easily change partner in a week or days
LOL no hard feelings to my friends that's been my inspiration to make this discussion, i love them all still its their life and this is still my life i just share my opinion LOLZ happy mylotting
3 people like this
25 responses
@00fear (3216)
• United States
24 Jan 12
I also like my single life right now. A lot of my friends and family would tell me that its because I can't get a girlfriend but I remember being able (or I still am able) to make girls what they like in a guy (smile, laugh, etc) and the girls even told me that I am a nice, funny, or fun guy. Right now, I do just want to have friends who are girls and hangout with them as a group like going out and stuff. Maybe in the future I would be ready for relationship but now I'm fine being single. I love my life how it is now and not really into, "I need a gf," etc. Lol. Although my dad had made me think, those who are single are just to irresponsible because they don't want to take care of anyone (their wives, kids, etc). At some points, I do think that but then again, its like its me, how I like it. Not the irresponsible part, because I'm still going to have responsibilities, but the single life....lol
@00fear (3216)
• United States
2 Feb 12
I know. Haha, he just said that if I never get in a relationship (and get married lol) in the future, I just want it like that to be irresponsible. I really don't mind what he says though cause its me lol....I think.. Of course is like not being irresponsible because I am also going to be on my own and I have to pay my own bills, and everything. Relationship or not, right? Lol
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
9 Feb 12
yeah definitely sooner or later you were on your own and you will have the whole responsibility over yourself with or without starting your own family.. lets just enjoy life lolz
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
wow, my friends just told me i'm miserable just because i'm single but you're part was worst than mine because your dad thinks your too irresponsible to even handle a relationship that's why you wanted to stay single after all, i really don't think of that part since managing a single life is far more responsible because you took care of yourself alone unlike being in a relationship while you're taking care of yourself your partner also took care of you
@craziestqueenever (1819)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Being single is a gift. I love it that I'm single right now, although I've been single for more than 7 years, I'm still happy with it. I told myself that I'm gonna enter into a relationship If I'm ready. I have to know myself much better and spend time with myself. I should learn to love myself, before I love others.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
9 Feb 12
yes i agree with you, how can we love others if we can't love our self first, better know what we really want and be surely ready before entering into a relationship so that it will work fine for us
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
A miserable condition does not depend on one's civil status. I've seen a lot of married people who are miserable just the same. So if there are single people who feels they are living miserably, then it is not because they are single but rather they are allowing themselves to be miserable. I know lots of people who are single who are living a happy and comfortable life. This does not mean all of them are planning to stay single forever though.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
i also not intend to stay single all my life i just needed some space and room to do everything i wanted to do, definitely i need a freedom, since lots of my past relationship tried to control me while we were still tied up with each other, most of the guys took control that makes woman under their wings, i just got tired of this things and it makes me miserable being always told what to do and what not to do
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
25 Jan 12
Hi xien 2 xien: I think just like you. Being single should not be a synonymity of being miserable. Being in a relationship or being single are two different stages and they both have their own pros and cons. You can be happy just enjoying your life, your freedom and maybe when you feel you have found the right person, start a relationship. But being in a relationship is not a requirement for happiness simply because happiness depends on you.
ALVARO
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
that's what i though also, but somehow my friends always told me to go look a relationship they have this thinking of collect and collect then select in the end, i have done so many things in my past relationship and it made me happy that time but as of now i intend to stay single cause this is what can make me happy right now,,, i think its a matter of your choice to become happy in the end
@cttolledo (5454)
• Legaspi, Philippines
25 Jan 12
It is ok to be single if you are still young but when you are already 25 up and you have plans of having a family of your own in the future,well you shouldn't be contented like that.. remember the older you are the harder you can get a partner in life!
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
9 Feb 12
the good thing was i am only 24 years old so just by following your advise i only have one year to explore being single then at 25 i might just need a serious relationship lolz
@nfrenciz (99)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Hi there,
for me indeed.. It's not, I've been single for a long time and i never felt like miserable, enjoyable maybe. Having a relationship sometimes doesn't makes us fully happy. Sometimes for me, it's kind of annoying. But being single is having a feeling as a free bird. If you say about roaming around, you can roam around freely, without having a feeling of worrying. You can go anywhere you like and anyone you wants to go with. It's the best thing happen in my life indeed.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
yeah some of my friends told me that being single is miserable, i might say that being single gives me freedom and its fun just hanging around whereever and whenever you wanted to be... right now i'm also feeling what your feeling i'm also a free bird just flying around without boundaries to even think of- when i say boundaries i only meant that without worrying that your partner might get hurt might be angry might be sad with what your doing
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
24 Jan 12
I think it is becoming very common for people wanting to stay single, particularly women, I think women have realized they want to be in complete control of their lives, when children are concerned then that different, everyone gets the miserys even married couples, I have a mixture of married friends and singles and as I see it all have their moments of being unhappy but I myself see my married friends, I see the females in the relationship sometimes being suppressed and a couple have even said that I am lucky to be single but that could be a case of the grass always looks greener om their part, for me I like to be the one in control of my life, I think you will see more girls staying single and independent.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
yes i totally agree with this, most of the time men decide in ones relationship becoming the women to be under their control, im not saying all but most of men took in control in their relationship, so becoming single for women means freedom and able to do whatever they wanted to do
@chiyosan (30183)
• Philippines
31 Jan 12
i do not think so. being single is a celebration of life, freedom, and discovery. =) there are more to life being single as much as spending time with a partner. it is just a matter of knowing your value as a person and how to manage and spend your time and resources wisely.
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
27 Jan 12
Just be yourself. Whatever you believe, whatever you feel and whatever you want to do that are entirely you. If you'd rather live as a single than having a partner which is not to your liking, then be single. Others do not understand your reason for being single just as you would not understand their reasons for changing partners easily... Just be comfortable with your life and be happy.
@anncherry (406)
• Philippines
26 Jan 12
I totally like being single. And mind you I'm quite busy with all the activities I've set for myself right now: work, friends, language classes, dance class, and... friends! :)) I'm happy the way things are right now, since I also get to do what I want and find out what I really want to do in life in the process. It may be weird that I'm not worrying about not getting a partner, but for me, love isn't something you should search--it finds you. So I'm just taking my precious time, making every second memorable and worthwhile, while I wait out for the right one. And perhaps, make my dreams come true before settling down. :)
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
25 Jan 12
I think it is not for everyone. Some people like being single and some like being with someone. I think it is personal choice. It doesn't mean you are miserable or someone else is miserable being with someone. I am very happy in my marriage and I would feel lonely and sad without him but you like being single and there is nothing wrong with that. =)
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
i'm happy to know that you were perfectly fine with your marriage life at least you've made the right choice of whom to marry since i can tell with your comment that you were happy and you can't live without him and im sure that he can't also live without you.. sooner or later i too intend to have a family of my own but at this stage of my life i choose to be single since i plan to get married at 27 i only have 2 years to do whatever i wanted and whenever i wanted it to do, i'm just enjoying my single life to the fullest
@gothtini (219)
• United States
24 Jan 12
I'm single and have been for quite a while, but I usually on't se myself as miserable and alone. Well, not because of being single anyway lol. More of because a lot of my friends moved away so its rare I have anyone to hang out with.
I know what you mean though, I have friends that just can't stand to be alone and they make me stare. This one friend I had broke up with his girlfriend and then for two weeks posted on facebook about how he can't stand to be alone and wished he had a girl, then he got another girl and was perfectly fine again. I really can't see how people can be like this, sure at times it can be lonely but you shouldn't have to have someone to be happy. Having a relationship can be really stressful at times, and at times its just not worth the worry. Friends are better to have then relationships, friendships tend to last a lot longer.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
i agree with you friend, i have lots of friends who stayed with me longer than any other guy who i tend to have in a relationship with before, i don't see also being single can make me look so miserable, cause when we engage in a relationship only a few days could count the best and most of the could be a lot more worst and it was not worth the time and worries... your friend take being a relationship to be his life and his happiness but maybe there are lots of things in this world that could really makes us happy than being in a relationship
@sharanhunt (20)
• India
30 Jan 12
single is fun..!
a man who is single can achieve anything in life, a man who has gf or family has to compromise on things.
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
hi there xien2xien,
Hey how's your mylotting today, can i get your number ( haha just kidding), I think being single is great you have the time to realize who you really are and how to do things your way, you get to focus more on the things that you want, your friends family and your career it is great to be single and i cherrished my days as one but now i am with someone that I wanna spend the rest of my life with may it be great or miserable. Great topic keep on lotting.
@boyuancy (1708)
• India
25 Jan 12
You don't actually have to get into a relationship just because your friends are asking you to. If you are good with being single, be single.
For me, I want someone to be with me, but I don't feel I'm in the right frame of mind to get into a relationship. My friends ask me to change, go talk to girls and what not.
Sometimes, I feel like doing so, but I just pass it. Why? Because I don;t feel like it. So my advice to you is, don't succumb to your friends' pressure and just enjoy your life the way you want it to.
All the best.
@jeetking (190)
•
25 Jan 12
Its not a worth a say that people who are lonely are sad and miserable.Their are many who have no one in this world of their own.their may be some other reason why they have called you unhappy and miserable.
@angelako (280)
• Italy
25 Jan 12
not actually there are some people they are miserable ina relationship.It depends on you if you enjoy to be alone so be it.But i have my aunty she's an oldmaid,though shes not miserable but we really know she regret to be single now.Because she really like kids,and one of my cousin she treated her like one.And you know when someone joke her specially when its a boy she think its truthful and wants it to be reality.so we feel pity about here because now we feel she want to have a man but no one dare to court her.