making peace with the past
By savypat
@savypat (20216)
United States
January 29, 2012 2:29pm CST
So many of us carry our pain all of our lives. I am not talking about physical pain but rather spritual pain. If we do not face the cause and forgive it, the pain becomes a habit that we may not even notice. But this habit colors the rest of our lives. So it's good to visit the past long enough to see what happened to wound you, clean out that wound with forgiveness and sew it up with love. When I am picturing love I see the color green so whatever I wish to love I cover in my mind with spring green, new fresh love. Do not revisit to place blame and there by relive the situation all over again, that is usless and will only make you bleed.
3 people like this
9 responses
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
2 Feb 12
I have mucho things from the past that haunt me. No, not karma, but things that I wish were different. I have been going through lots of emotional breakdown lately. With a failed marriage and having 2 children. It is heartbreaking. But that is only one thing. Albeit the main thing, there are other things that go along with that to make matters worse. It is almost like finding a needle in a hay stack.
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
6 Feb 12
Well, the thing that bothers me the most about the broken marriage is my children. They have to live with this the rest of their lives. And my ex is quite the liar. And my son knows it also. It's a shame an 11 year old has to see that his mother is naive and a liar. I know my children are affected by it. And that is what hits me the hardest. And I will never forget how my son took the news when the evil ex told him we were splitting up. That is etched in my memory and that I will never forgive her for. I will hold that against her for the rest of my life.
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
30 Jan 12
Hi pat~ I have been doing alot of "re-visiting" myself lately. I don't
know why exactly. There are things that I've done in my past that I'm
not particularly proud of, but I've made peace with most of them. I've
"let go" of "past lovers" who won't "let go" even though I've told them
to many times. The most difficult issues are the ones with my Mom and
our family. She refuses to let anything go. She has just recently been
diagnosed with Demensia. I am very worried about her now. Although I
have tried over and over again to make peace with her and the things
that happened in our past I don't know if this will change her. She
is forgetting "daily" things now. She seems to still remember "long
term" memories. I wish she would understand that it is pointless to
revisit things that can't be changed. I surely have~
1 person likes this
@savypat (20216)
• United States
30 Jan 12
Short term memory is the first to go, depending how fast her demensia progresses.
She may soon only have her long term ones. Even if these are angry bitter memories these will be all she has. Allow her to have these and just accept that this is all that is left of her mind. It's a very hard thing to do but you must put everthing in it's place and even if she doesn't know it you will know that all that pain and sorrow is no longer real, it's only in her mind. Blessings and prayers for you all.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
30 Jan 12
Hi savypat, So often we forget to do this and keep revisiting the places of pain. I've heard the stories of been hurt over and over again, and the person telling it refuses to forgive, but only cares for revenge. Thanks for reminding us all of the importance and power of love. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
30 Jan 12
You are right. Some of us cling to our pain like a drowning man clings to a piece of floating wood then we wonder why it still hurts.
I have discovered these past few years, recovering from a divorce, that my pride was my biggest obstacle to forgiving those who hurt me. That, and acknowledging my own part in the event. It took me years but I'm finally at peace with it and have used that self-realization to settle other issues that have gnawed at me most of my life.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (220158)
• Chile
31 Jan 12
I think I apparently forgive but sometimes it happens that you forgive many times until you say "no more". And then you discover that the wounds along the years have been so great that they sort of ate up all the love there was. If that happens, you must let go for your own good.
1 person likes this
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
3 Feb 12
I think that this is something that we all need to be able to do in our lives, but I also think that it is something that we have a difficult time with. There are a lot of things that have happened in my life that I would like to be able to go back and change, but that isn't possible so I instead try to overcome those adversities in my life.
I don't think that I will ever be fully successful, but it most definitely is something that I'm working on.
@floiecometa (156)
•
2 Feb 12
Yes, I do really agree with you. Unless we will not make a decision to love and forgive we cannot bring out ourselves from pain of hurts.
