trust issues and relationships
By sdmoonchild
@sdmoonchild (731)
United States
February 1, 2012 5:28am CST
I have a very low trust level when it comes to people now, probably because I got hurt really bad with my ex husband. Not physically hurt but emotionally and financially hurt. Just recently I received a phone call from a bill collector finding out that while we were still married and I was at work one night, he went on my computer to one of those payday loan sites and used all of my info to obtain a loan of $1500 of which he used for alcohol and gambling. Because we were married at the time and he is in prison (thank god!) I am stuck paying for this or I would have been charged with fraud. They were kind enough to let me make payment arrangements but I am so stressed out. I have already made two payments and am working diligently to pay this off. They are trying to help me obtain more charges against him so he can stay in prison longer. It will take me years to build up trust in people. There are so many con artists these days one has to be very careful.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
2 Feb 12
The similar experience I had right now. A guy who is at work who I thought can be good friend. We started a small business, and obtain a discover card as business credit card. He used my info to apply for it, and at the end, he max out the credit card, God knows what he did with those money. Now, I am charged with delinquent, and hurt my credit score. Never trust those people again. And I hope some day they will be go through the same severely.
@sdmoonchild (731)
• United States
2 Feb 12
i am sorry to hear about your situation. I can feel your pain. I hope someday those who hurt us deliberately will get the same thing happening to them-after all what goes around, comes around. Good luck in your situation.
@shimi18 (98)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
Hi there! I think it's really normal to be very doubtful to people who hurt us and broke our trust. I also experience that, i get doubtful to people who betrayed me, yes, we can forgive but i don't think we can give "trust", a trust as good as the one broken for the second time.
@sdmoonchild (731)
• United States
1 Feb 12
i would have to agree with that. It is such a painful hurt to try to get over. Thank you for responding. Have a great day!
@faith210 (11224)
• Philippines
2 Feb 12
hi sdmoonchild! i am really sorry to hear of your experience with your ex-husband. however, i am glad that he is away now. i can not blame you for having trust issues. to be honest, i too have trust issues; maybe because of being hurt, deceived, used, betrayed by people i have trusted over the years. i think i am more careful and cautious in dealing with other people now. i used to trust wholeheartedly when i was young, i guess i learned a lot from thereon. however, i do believe that there are still a lot of trustworthy people out there. we shouldn't lose hope.
Blessings and take care...
faith210
@megamatt (14291)
• United States
3 Feb 12
Trust is something that is not easily earned and it should not be. There are some people who tend to do what they can to gain your trust, and drawn you in and then BAM they take what they want from you. Sadly there are a lot of people who are very good at what they do. Con artists that are going to really be able to make you think that they are trust worthy.
After all the best type of liar is the person who seems absolutely honest. And the most dangerous perhaps. I think that in time, trust can be gained, but I think that for most, trust will never be one hundred percent. It will be high, but I think that personally I and many others will be somewhat guarded. Our lives will not be nor should they be an open book where every single page is available for those who might not be as trustworthy as they might seem.
@yahnee (1243)
• Philippines
1 Feb 12
Yes, I do understand your plight and I can certainly relate to your experience with your ex-husband. It is a pity when you become at the losing end of a marriage. I too lost my trust when I got hurt by my husband badly not physically but emotionally. I got over it and learned to trust and love again but it seems like I am being taken advantage of. I am not sure though but since my bad experience, I don't seem to know how to trust again. However, there may still be someone whom you can trust in the future. Not all men are alike.
@tatzkie23 (770)
• Philippines
2 Feb 12
I'm sorry to hear about that. Your ex husband should rot in jail. LOL. But anyways, yes you are right, Once the trust is gone, it's hard to trust again. It's normal to feel this way, maybe next time, when that happens we should try to minimize the things we share to other people. We should study the person or really get to know the person before we should trust him/her.