Has the quality of friends changed over time?

Well I think the main thing is we need to desire a trusted friend. Without a desire to have a bosom buddy kinda thing it will not endure as such and of course it has to be there for both parties. Sometimes I think it is point in our life where circumstances connect us with someone else. A strong bond can develop with anyone at the time appointed but they do say blood runs thicker than water. Earlier generations were different and didn’t have the push button world we have today but then again if go back far enough like during the depression/2nd war for example, it must have been very turbulent times then too, so maybe it has all to do with the heart?

HI JenInTn oh I have been friends with my best friend Nelda for over twenty years. we became friends because our sons were also friends. We met in the wash room at our old aparment and discovered we had so much in commo0n. even our birthdays are both in November. Our sons and Mike David have been friends for years along with Mike David., Her son is also Michael so she calls him Michael we call them David and Rivers to tell them ap apart.We are still the best of friends. we are b oth from the midwest, she is nine years my junior and we are both type two diabetics. We just hit it off when we first met and now since I have been in this tiresome retirement center she had emailed me each work day as a sort pf lifeline to me from better days. I think its the number of things we both share and like, I am not sure but she is there for me if I am in trouble and me for her. its a deep abiding friendship. Now she is going through a rough time as her husband Bill has to have bypass surgery on his heart. they do not live together but they are not divorced and she spends most weekends up in YUcapai at his home.

Occasionaly I think you will find real loyalty within friends still but I think today is a very selfish world and things are just not the same as the old days.

Grandmas are the best creatures in the world. It could be because they have reached that point in their lives when there is no need anymore to struggle or work like h*ll. They are settled and can now appreciate the finer thing in life like kids, pets, books, etc. So yes, go ahead and give your grandma a big hug.

I found a great person and even years are passing by we are so closed enough to be together as always..it seems that years, work, family that keeps us apart will not make it for us to br separate bh heart. And no matter how circumstances tear ur we are always closed together in prayers...

to start off with friends is what you make of them, it is not that times are diff-rant as much as the changes and values people have now adays.young people seem to say Friends are disposable like a pet you have out grown or have no longer any use for,as the older we get the higher value we place on our friends and dear pets as time comes to a close we start to see that in youth expandability and try holding on some times to hard.

I have friends that I have shared stuff with for twenty or more years, but our lives are kind of separate now because of job situations and moves, etc. I do think that we used to have more time to invest in friendship. To me, that is the secret, investing time, plus paying attention to details, and sometimes just putting them first above yourself. I have had friends do that for me.

Staying in touch with one anotyher helps alot. sometimes we lose sight of them and then something happens thatwe fiind one nother like a friend Ihave on face book we have known each other since the late 60s lost toucha dn she found me on FB SO great thats over 40 years of being friends Fate stepped in when me and 2nd hubby found one another and we turned in to soul mates nice to be close to some people

quality of friend dont change with time..............it just changes with your growing age........think about your childhood friends,teenage friends and office friends............

I've always had friends. I'm approachable, concerned, caring and make myself available. So, I will continue to try to be a better friend where I can. Do you think it is the times that have caused people to not be so close anymore? I think that some people will have few friends and others will have many. Much may depend on us. We can have the friends we want. Do you think it is by chance that we find friend partners that are meant to be with us throughout our lives? I think that very little is meant to be. We make what we want. We just need to find someone that wants the same as we do. However I think that we should learn to be happy no matter what and then no matter what happens we are still happy. Isn't that what life is all about, to be happy? Do you have a friend that you have shared so many years with? Yes, one friend I have had for about 40 years now. But I can make friends any time so it is not really important how long I have them. I like to have many friends, friends for all reasons and friends for all seasons. If you do...what is your secret to the lasting friendship that I think we all long for a little bit?

Hi jen... Yes, i have seen many couples of friend highly attached with each other. Its actually gifted that someone can find such a friend with whom s/he can share a lasting friendship. I am waiting for..... Have a nice time.

i believe so with their lifestyle and the kinds of friends they met over the changes of time, location and other real life issues they might encounter. i myself notice that my attitude with friends changes when they change their behavior toward me. for exammle we hardly had anymore communication so we felt aloof with each other and the time we become close also the interest changes.

This is a beautiful story, it sounds like a fairy tale. I don't have such friends. Many people have left the town or the country. But this is not the only reason. A good friend from my first class in school still lives in her house very close to me. But our paths went away from each other and I see her maybe once a year. Another girl from my student's class lived ten years abroad and we remained friends. She came back here but it seems that we are not so close like before. I don't know who is to blame but I'm sad because a good friendship is a treasure and we lost it forever.

I have a few friends that I keep in touch with but one that I would definitely feel very sad if we lost touch. We both grew up in the midwest. I married my high school sweetheart and still live in the midwest. She married her high school sweetheart and moved to Texas about 4 yrs after we graduated in 1978. For a long time we kept in touch by writing letters, talking on the phone, sending greeting cards, and we would spend time together when she came back 'home'. Technology evolved so we kept in touch via email, and now facebook. We've known each other since grade school. We went to the same church, church youth group and all the activities. Our parents were friends. She lived on a farm and I lived in town. I loved being on farms so I stayed at her house a lot! She was academically smart and a perfectionist. I was good in art and just goofy. Looking back, we were so different but that was a big part of our friendship. We respected each other. We respected our differences. We loved doing the same things like youth group, picking strawberries, talking about boys, hayrides, feeding her goats, talking about boys, shopping, walking up town from my house, talking about boys, swimming, listening to popular songs on the radio, and did I mention talking about boys? We dressed up as Raggedy Ann and Andy (I was Andy - someone had to do it :), Laurel and Hardy, cartoon characters, and many more for the youth group halloween parties. Technology has definitely changed the way people keep in touch. I think it's kind of weird how we can 'friend' a person on facebook without really getting to know them. This can give some people a false impression of friendship. With all the social places on the net it's easy for some people see those friendships as close/strong/trusting. I love facebook. I feel closer to high school friends and relatives that I haven't been able to actually be with. But I don't think that you can really know someone unless you've actually spent time with them. Whether it's just the two of you going to the mall, or a football game, or doing things together with a group of people. Quality time spent talking, seeing their expressions and responses to situations, sharing experiences, sharing memories of actually being together. We will always be friends and have a special bond because of the memories we created and share. Even though we have new friends we are still Bff's in our hearts!

My close buddies are my friends since grade school. I guess the secret of our friendship is that we know each other very well and that we know that each one is like a brother or sister already. We also make it a point to see each other every month to have dinner and chat. My mother has friends like your grandmother where she knew these friends since grade school too. They have remained friends even after each one married and had families and even moved away. I don't think that it is by chance that you meet good friends in your life. Maybe it is luck. Or maybe it was the generation that we lived in. But one thing I have seen that is common with my mother and my friends is that we all went to a Catholic school. I guess we were able to develop a bond because from grade school up to the time that we graduated from high school, we were classmates. So it is a joke amongst us that we can blackmail any classmate who claims to be beautiful or fair skinned (I am from the Philippines so it is rare for us to have those snow white complexions) by showing the old class pictures. We have one such friend that she claims that she has always had fair skin and refuses to admit that she has had any help from a dermatologist. We were all laughing so hard when we got together one time and this other friend brought our old grade school picture where it showed that she was very brown.

It is an interesting question. I wonder that as well. Not just about why people don't seem to forge friendships like that anymore but it seems to me that in recent years people have become very cruel to one another. Small acts of kindness that were once almost expected of people are now the things that marketing executives use in commercials to make us feel sappy. Because we don't see those things as much anymore. People seem to have gotten so much more self-absorbed. But to answer your question, in my typically verbose fashion, I have some very close, very important friendships without which I constantly wonder where my life would be. I have two surrogate families, my sorority sisters and my Kill Hannah family ("Started out as a street team, grew into an army, still feels like a family." sayeth our inspirational leader). Both groups see their members as a part of a huge, always growing family but not every one of them really is family to me. But the ones who are, the ones with whom I have created special bonds, I love them with everything I have and I like to think the feeling is mutual.

I belong to the old school of thought that says that friends are for keeps. What a coincidence really Jen that just last week my friend of yesteryear's spent a week with me with her husband. I am also famous for getting together classmates and this I have been doing year in and year out the first get togetherthough was years after we had left school. We were 33 in all and all had passed. But when I organised the first meet I realised that we had already lost two of our classmates and now the number has increased to 5 Your grandmother must have been hysterical meeting her best friend and exchanging news and views although much of that could have been all wrong what with old age catching up on them that contributes to loss of memory!

most important to establish an eternal friend,that knows the weaknesses and strengths of our friends, and vice versa. in friendship there must be trials heavy and light, so if we know the weaknesses and strengths of a friend, then your friendship will last forever.

Hello JenInTN, Yes its difficult to find good and loyal friends these days but its all about give and take when you are loyal to someone then its more probabilty that person will be loyal to you too.I have lot many friends who are really good ones and i always find them when i need them in difficult time and i too help them out when they need me.

I have a friend before, actually we are neighbors. We are always together and happy with each other company. But man, love/girl can really break such good friendship. I cant believe that among all man he is the only one who will not betrayed me like that. But Im happy I get rid both of them in my life(not killing them) I just moved forward and I think karma is hitting them hard right now. Friends are really the worst enemy.