sister against sister
By mariamac
@mariamac (145)
India
February 7, 2012 5:55am CST
I have a very close friend of mine who is happily married. However, she has this elder sister who is not married and i feel is jealous about her kid sister (my friend) who is well settled and tries to create problems in her life. I have tried my best to explain to my friend but she has high regards for her sister and does not like me telling anything about her. Now my friend just about 3 months ago has got a baby girl and undergoing postnatal depression which all ladies go through after delivery. and she is depending totally on her sister for the emotional support and this sister of her's is trying to take advantage of her postnatal period and poisoning her about her husband over small arguments that my friend and her hubby have at home. My friend is leaning more towards her sister because she knows i am telling her the truth and showing her the true mirror so she is avoiding me and trying to keep her self happy by listening to her elder sister who is actually trying to break their marriage. Now i can't tell my friend anything since she is very vulnerable right now and her sister won't talk to me. I feel very bad for my friend who is a victim of her own sister's jealousy. What should i do?
2 people like this
4 responses
@parascevi (313)
• Greece
7 Feb 12
This is s very tricky and difficult situation. Unfortunately you can not intervene anymore and i am sure that your friend one day will eventually realize how much you tried to help her. For now, you should not try to do anything else because your friend might really get angry with you. In these situations you can not do anything else and i think that your effords were really of love and care for your friend. I hope that one day she will realize how much lucky she is to have you as a friend.
1 person likes this
@mariamac (145)
• India
10 Feb 12
thank you parascevi for your time and response on my problem. I too feel i should right now keep quiet and just pray for her which is the best thing at this time. I just hope and pray she realizes her mistake or just applies her OWN brains which God has given her.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (23153)
• United Kingdom
7 Feb 12
Well are you really 100% sure that it is indeed jealousy. Maybe the sister has her side to tell too. Maybe she is just misunderstood? MAYBE.
Anyway, I appreciate how you try to neutralize the situation. But the thing is "blood is thicker than water" so it's going to be hard to win in that situation. The only consolation is you didn't lack in advising. I think what you could do is not focus on what the sister is doing but try to focus on teaching your friend to be more patient and trusting with her husband. In that way you can help save your friend's marriage as well as her family ties.
@mariamac (145)
• India
10 Feb 12
Thank you flapiz for your response. Yes I am 100% sure. I know you want me to be extra careful before i make any remarks on anyone be it my own friend's sister because there could always be some misunderstanding. But i know i am 100% sure about my friend's sister. As you have said i tried to convince my friend because i know her more than her sister. But right now i think i leave it up to God, i will just pray for her. Because i feel even friends have to keep certain boundaries when it comes to blood relationships. So i will just pray for her, that's the best thing right now.
1 person likes this
@ladygator (3465)
• United States
30 Apr 12
Maria, I am so sad to hear about this!! This must hurt you so much to be seeing this right in front of you. I know it is so hard to see someone that we care about being hurt and especially when it is by people that should really have their best interest and well being. I would still try to be there but subtly. Like maybe take her out to a spa day or a movie, lunch or drink some coffee. And when ever you guys are hanging out dont talk about anything by but her positive points and things that will uplift her. Have you talked to her husband at all? What is his take on this? I hope that you can get through to her some how. And since it has been 3 months since your origional post, hopefully its better now.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
7 Feb 12
I've read what you wrote and you have done enough for your friend.
We cannot blame her listening to her sister.
Since you have done your part, all you can do right now is to keep an updates about her.
I am sure, time will come that the kid sister will realized what her elder sister is doing.
This is a matter of sister/family relations and being a friend- I know you want to save and help your friend- but you are caught in between and you cannot do more.
Pray for your friend, that will help a lot.
