Is it MYLOT?

Hi Sjvg, I think I know the discussions you are talking of and I will say that they are not the norm around here. I am not sure just what happened. Both are very respected people here and both are quite sensitive. I really don't want to get into it. I think both got hurt from these discussions and one is unfortunately no longer with us. It's easy to say we should take things lightly and I agree that we should but when you are the target of these things, well, it doesn't feel so easy. I hope the member that left comes back and I really hope that this discussion doesn't start it all up over again. It really needs to be dropped.

Hi sjvg1976, I felt a little tense too reading discussions like that. Although I did not actually got the time to react on those discussions, I have read some of it... and made comments on a few of it. I was just a bit shocked too that it has come to that. Hopefully myLot continues to be fun and polite... and not about anger and flaming.

hi sjvg well of co urse flaming is not the answer but you know what I just realized that human beings make errors so yes I made two errors. first let people say mean nasty things about you but just do not even let it matter. But I am a human being and human beings make errors. S o I lost two discussions and y es 'I am an old person in age and in terms of being here five years. But I tried to protest a blanket statement and it just got outof hand. sure I could quit too and almost did. but I have survived much worse than this. I will not be run out of mylot.After all its not what others think of one, but what one thinks of herself.

hello sj, I also felt saying goodbye here in mylot last year. I become in-active for sometime-but decided to stay. Bad/sad encounter/s here happens unexpectedly. So, I tell myself, why should I leave. They don't own the site anyway. My friends are here- if enemies are there, let me face them as well. One thing I've learned- we never knew who is real and who are pretenders here. So- watch your back I was stabbed not only once but twice,maybe thrice :x. This is mylot- like the real world. We make friends and find enemies too.

Hi sjvg: These are sad news and I am glad that I haven't found these kind of people yet. I don't understand why someone would create drama insulting the other members. We are here to share, cooperate, discuss in a polite way, becoming friends, learn and of course earn some money. It's so sad when people create these negative situations ALVARO

Hi sjvg Dont you know this is a Family out here? As in a family we have misunderstandings, small loving fights and arguments, so do we have them here. It adds to fun of some, disappoints some others and also plays a significant role at times for a while in deciding who stands where. I have seen a bit of it too but then... at end, it is my strong belief - MyLot = Family So, we are to get hurt for a while and then forget all and things get back to normal.

Yes, you are right. when discussing things we should always be aware of the words we use. Do not follow emotions arising from such discussions. If discussion between two parties and each doesnn't want to give in, beware....fight will follow.

Hi Sjvg, i had been here for years and had been seeing this type of problems being arise many times. Even myself ever get hurt a few times by some members in here, but i just ignored and continued with my activity in here. I think we should always think positively, nor matter what is the outcome in here and in other situation as well. I agreed with you that we should always take things lightly. Hope you have a nice Valentine's Day...

I used to get mixed up in some of these and discovered that is not the way on mylot. I am going to leave that craziness for the ones who live for it. Not me. Getting hurt and dissapointed is not something I enjoy, and if you get into one of these, you end up feeling that way when you haven't even done anything to deserve it. Learn and let learn.

Hi sjvg... Yes, i have found a vast difference in mylot between my joining time and today. It seems that some members are trying to make this site so ordinary. Truly they are perverted and trying to do the same to mylot. I know some female members here who personally contacted me that they have blocked their account and reopen another account. Its because they have to suffer from some indecent stuffs in interaction and through PM. Its disgusting. have a nice time.

Hi sjvg, I know that discussion you are talking about and I know that member you are talking about. It's ok I guess leaving this site will make him happy. He's my friend too but I don't take evrything so serious. Just have to move on and get over itpeace

People change you know that...Is not always have the same emotion ,each day change.. Like if they like much this site in the first place,but after they find other site they leave my lot... Its their choices and we can't control them but they should matured to think that my lot is great and more encouraging..

Hi sjvg: I haven't been active since the beginning of the month since I was busy relocating to my new place of work. So I have not observed closely. Today is the day after some time that I have time on hand and just started picking up friend's discussions. Flaming is bad on any forum. But I have seen this on many forums and some handful of people doing it. Majority in any forum like to avoid it and do like healthy interaction. I'm surprised it happens in myLot too, so much so that it is disturbing you. Either the concerned people have to exercise restraint or admin has to prevail. Sad!

its just normal, the best thing to do is to learn from those and get positive outcome from what you have learned. negativity never goes anywhere...

Eh, ignore it. And concentrate on only responding to discussions that aren't targetting negativity at others. I also dislike these discussions. Sometimes I start discussions about being frusterated with a friend or family member, but never a member of MyLot. That's what MESSAGING is for if you ask me. But I can't even imagine getting angry at anyone on here, not really.

I'm not one of the older members. I had seen only sparks and for the first time I saw this real fire. But as others say myLot is like a family and these things happen between close relatives. Finally the admin extinguishes the fire and things go on. The point is to stay cool and notice the good things. Have a nice day.

Hi Sj.. I don't know about which you are talking, I guess I am missing something.. But yes I have seen such misunderstanding and because of that few good lotters left this site. I really feel sad sometimes. Misunderstanding can be created anywhere and anytime better we don't take it seriously..

I think there are from time to time discussions which are too heated and some users who enjoy having these disputes and crossing the boundaries of common sense,but these discussions are rare,because most of the users here are mature and friendly people who know how to communicate with others and make their opinions heard without hurting or offending,so I see no reason for concern as those few who have such a conduct eventually eliminate themselves and probably search for other ways of spreading their venom online.

You are correct. There has been at least one person that has been flaming an older member here and she was very hurt by it, but she won’t be leaving that I know of.

My curiosity is killing me, as I wonder if any of my own myLot friends were involved and if one of them left. I've been sick and away from MyLot for a few days, so I any of my friends are involved, I've missed it. I've never seen the really bad interactions here. Maybe I've just been lucky so far. Whomever was affected, I'm sorry someone was hurt. I think choosing the right friends helps a bit. I just got my taste of such a thing on Facebook. I knew I was playing with fire when I accepted a friend request from an online bookseller I'd been on a discussion list with. He had a reputation for tearing people to pieces when he disagreed with them politically.I was going to give him a chance because I was accepting a number of our mutual bookselling acquaintances. knew we were political opposites, and normally ignored his offensive remarks he posted on his own wall.I know he's not a reasonable man and is not open to listening to the other side, so discussing our differences will do nothing to make him think. I don't know what exactly drew me into the discussion. I think I'd posted something conservative on my wall. He is a progressive. He disagreed with what I'd said. I respectfully disagreed back, another bookseller friend came in on my side, and then my cousin (whom I've never met because he's from Texas) jumped in on my side. Result? Although all of us respectfully presented our side of the question, he insulted all of us and cussed us out and told us to burn forever in the hell I don't think he believes in. I'm used to his venom. He drove one of my liberal friends off a bookseller list over almost nothing. I can take it. I was really upset though, by the things he said to my cousin. It was the first time I'd seen this happen in my circle of Facebook friends. My mistake was trying to be polite and accepting colleagues I've never met into my circle of Facebook friends. Now my birthday notifications from Facebook are full of people whose names I don't even recognize. I'd like to turn back the clock and unfriend everyone I don't know personally.