making an effort to keep the marriage alive
@SIMPLYD (90721)
Philippines
February 18, 2012 4:49am CST
For the marriage to be always alive, both the couple should make an effort to keep it alive.
Everybody wants to keep their marriage strong and alive, so maybe if your husband seems complacent in doing so, perhaps you as a wife , should.
Me, I always would remind my husband if an occasion is coming , like our birthdays , our anniversary, and even Valentine’s Day. At our age, I always would initiate in asking where and what we will be doing on those occasions to celebrate it. That way, he too will suggest what he likes, thus the occasion will be celebrated with the both of you enthusiastic about it. Our daughter would also always remind us of occasions, because she knows its important for us to celebrate them in one way or another. 
Well, it’s just one of those ways of keeping the marriage alive. But most of all in my opinion, an open communication is what is so important. 
Well, it’s just one of those ways of keeping the marriage alive. But most of all in my opinion, an open communication is what is so important. 2 people like this
13 responses
@dpk262006 (58678)
• Delhi, India
18 Feb 12
Hi
It is nice on your part that you love to celebrate important events and keep reminding your hubby about it. It is a good way to keep alive your relationship with your partner, which tends to slow down after certain period of time.
Hope you will continue to remain this way and keep both of you happy.
We also try to go out once in a blue moon for outing or dinner so that we could get rid of monotony in our life.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Yes, being that way with our hubbies, makes our life colorful, specially when you would invite relatives to attend, or even if you go out to dine even just in a fast food joint.
It will make both of you always look forward to those occasions in your lives. It does break the monotony of life.
It will make both of you always look forward to those occasions in your lives. It does break the monotony of life. 
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Well, for me anytime could be a special occasion for the couple. Though, when we make effort to celebrate our birthdays and our wedding anniversaries , it seems to give us a nice feeling that we are being given importance specially on that day.
@fantasticbabe (981)
• Philippines
19 Feb 12
yes, communication is the best for everyone and most of the time should be practice by every couple as you say this strengthen the bond. also like to add being God as the center of every relationship and trust to each other should be also taken as additional support which for the everyday situation should be serve as a habit so if everyone have respect and fear they would not be tempted to do bad things, the same with marriage to stay longer.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
I totally agree with all that you have just said , my friend. It's nicer also if both the partner should always really make an effort to keep the marriage alive.
Because if you just let the marriage go as it rolls, without any spark every now and then, it will be so boring that one might think of seeking the fun, outside of the marriage. 
Because if you just let the marriage go as it rolls, without any spark every now and then, it will be so boring that one might think of seeking the fun, outside of the marriage. 
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
19 Feb 12
Nice tips dear Dina
I agree with you, i was married in 1966, we are a happy couple, my kids are so good, they remind us of special occasions and we enjoy them together..
my daughter lives 60 kms away, but she too joins with her hubby, son and daugher, it feels so good to be together.
Best of luck.
Professor
I agree with you, i was married in 1966, we are a happy couple, my kids are so good, they remind us of special occasions and we enjoy them together..
my daughter lives 60 kms away, but she too joins with her hubby, son and daugher, it feels so good to be together.
Best of luck.
Professor
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Thanks that you like my saying that celebrating occasions helps a marriage alive, professor. It also adds color to life, as you have attested for saying that you enjoy celebrating occasions with the family.
@jricky1 (6800)
• China
20 Feb 12
Once i remember that i've saw a movie,the man told his friend that the secret for his marriage alive is that he keep it fresh.It is so important and a fresh marriage does works,they think about each other as new lovers,it's interesting though,but quite works.@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Well, that also true. Both of you should always try to make interesting things that both of you will like. That way, the marriage becomes exciting and always alive.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
20 Feb 12
Open communication is always a good thing to have in any relationship and if you don't have that then what's the sense in having any type of relationship. To be honest, etc. is what most relationships are all about and the communicating part is what helps as well. You have a good idea on how to work things out.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
21 Feb 12
Thank you for saying so my friend.
I think being married for 21 years, we now know how to keep our marriage alive. And one of those is open communication. Both of us should always be willing to be listened to and to be the listener.
That way, we enjoy it, every time we talk with each other.
I think being married for 21 years, we now know how to keep our marriage alive. And one of those is open communication. Both of us should always be willing to be listened to and to be the listener.
That way, we enjoy it, every time we talk with each other. 
@yanzalong (18987)
• Indonesia
18 Feb 12
Many marriages failed due to both husband and wife not being in agreement about something. This seems trivial at the beginning of the marriage life. But later, the problem will crop up.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
If you truly love each other, you would be able to make adjustments for the marriage to work. Besides, before you get married, the both of you have more or less known each other's character.
Should there be some other character of the person,they would just be minor perhaps and they could more or less adjust to it.
So, if you both truly love each other, you would know how to compromise, just to keep each other together.
@Hazelrose (2179)
• Philippines
19 Feb 12
Hello SIMPLYD,I've been married for almost 34 years and I'm happy to say that its going stronger as years pass by.Although we encountered problems sometimes but we find ways to settle everything.Thanks God,until now our marriage works.I think Love and respect had a big help in our married life.Of course Prayers is very important in any relationship.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Yes, love & respect is also a great factor in keeping the marriage alive always. And the effort should come from both of the partners.
And i also strongly agree, that prayers also is a big factor, my friend.
Wow, 34 years! That's already lengthy and i must congratulate you and your partner for that.
My husband and i are already in our 21st year, and i thank God that He has made us patient with each others some shortcomings. 
And i also strongly agree, that prayers also is a big factor, my friend.
Wow, 34 years! That's already lengthy and i must congratulate you and your partner for that.
My husband and i are already in our 21st year, and i thank God that He has made us patient with each others some shortcomings. 
@obe212003 (2299)
• Philippines
19 Feb 12
Keeping the marriage intact is one continuous issue that should be sustained by both parties involved and hopefully with constant initiation of effort in doing so would surely give a good effect. Celebrating special occasions or just simply having a one-on-one heart-to-heart talk bonding moment would surely be significant.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
That's true my friend. Keeping the love alive should always be the effort of both partners.
Yes, celebrating those occasions, makes you both happy.
@sjvg1976 (41290)
• Delhi, India
19 Feb 12
Hello Simplyd,
We also celebrate these special ocassions and yes my wife is the one who keeps on reminding me for these ocassions but i beleive this alone is not sufficient to keep relationship stronger what else is required to keep marriage alive is trust and respect for the partner one must respect to his/her partner's feelings.Moreover compromise is what we are supposed to do sometimes we have to do the things which we don't like but our partner like and we have to do it for her/his sake.
and yes my wife is the one who keeps on reminding me for these ocassions but i beleive this alone is not sufficient to keep relationship stronger what else is required to keep marriage alive is trust and respect for the partner one must respect to his/her partner's feelings.Moreover compromise is what we are supposed to do sometimes we have to do the things which we don't like but our partner like and we have to do it for her/his sake.@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
That's true celebrating special occasions is not enough to keep the love alive. Like i said, it's just one of those ways, we can add color to our marriage.
Yes, we could always make a compromise, so both would be satisfied with anything they agreed to do.
I guess, women are always the one who reminds their husbands about occasions, because they are the ones that are more sentimental and wants romance to be always alive.
Yes, we could always make a compromise, so both would be satisfied with anything they agreed to do.
I guess, women are always the one who reminds their husbands about occasions, because they are the ones that are more sentimental and wants romance to be always alive. 
@jhuddith (222)
• Philippines
19 Feb 12
Been married for 14months... But before we decided to tie the knot, he had been my boyfriend for 8 years+.. Even for a long time with the relationship, we still find differences/disagreements even during marriage... Well, that can't be avoided though...
I believe in order for our relationship to prosper, we must put God in the center of our relationship. We must continue to communicate - talk talk talk - even on trivial things.. Learn to accept each other's flaws and respect one another... It's also great if we get to remember and celebrate special events (though it's just a product of commercial strategies)...
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Wow, so you were his girlfriend for 8 years before finally tying the knot. That's great to hear, my friend.
Yes, putting God in the center of the relationship is also a big factor in keeping the marriage alive.
But celebrating the occasions in both our lives, surely adds color to the marriage too, my friend.
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Yes, when the partners seem to notice that the marriage is getting to separation, they should already make an effort to save it. Nowadays, some couple would even go to a marriage counselor, just to save their marriage and i am happy to note that.
That way, things they don't usually express with each other, can be conveyed through the marriage counselor, who does things to make it possible that it could be relayed in a nicer way.
@shwetat195 (628)
• India
19 Feb 12
my last relationship ended because of lack of coimmunication,. so i know the importance of communication and i ensure my current relation does not get affected for lack of communication. couple have to work together to keep the relation alive. for that matter all relation to survive need to talk or chat. happy lotting
@SIMPLYD (90721)
• Philippines
20 Feb 12
Yes, open communication is a must for couples. That way, whatever they have to point out to their partner is being relayed loud and clear. Thus, a solution to a problem is being mutually agreed upon to be made.
