They are coming...
By clouds0327
@clouds0327 (1389)
Philippines
February 23, 2012 9:54am CST
Sometimes I really feel like being alone or I enjoy a nice quiet surrounding. But I live with my in laws and the house I am living in right now are theirs. I don't have any problem with them visiting this house because of course like I mentioned it is their house. But, everytime they come home, (every week or every 2 weeks) they see a lot things and criticize alot. I work days a week, so there are times that I can't clean the wholeplace like squeaky clean. I do the laundry and I did the laundry yesterday, and Im feeling sleepy now and I feel lazy. They are coming tomorrow so it bothers me cause I don't have the energy to do a general cleaning. But I have no choice even I am very tired I have to stand up and clean up to avoid criticisms from them. How about you guys have you experienced the same thing before?
2 people like this
7 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Feb 12
I completely understand what your going through! I live with my parents and my grandmother. My husband and I fight a lot because they stress us out so bad. As soon as we can afford to get out of here we are!!
We walk on egg shells here, our kids get yelled at all the time by them and were told we never do enough.
I hope we can get out of this situation soon! 
1 person likes this
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
24 Feb 12
Hi "LovingMyBabies"! I hope all is well with you and your family today. That's exactly the feeling I have right now. Same sitution I always get into a fight with my husband everytime I hear criticisms from his family. I mean he can see me when I work here in the house. Like I don't even have time to have fun anymore. He sees me when I have to do the laundry instead of sleeping because It's all piling up. Sometimes I asked him if he could help me do it, but guys usually make things complicated when they help so you won't ask them for help any more. It's hard when you live with other people or you don't have your own place. You will always be the subject of criticisms, when sometimes it's not right anymore. Let's both hope we will have our own houses in the future and live independently. We can do this.:)
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
24 Feb 12
By the way, I think you shouldn't let the yell at our kids that way. No matter what they are yours so they don't have the right to do that on them without your permission. 
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Feb 12
hi clouds once we accept any help especially a big one like a house that theirs we have a lot of strings attached and its really hard t o keep from wanting to blow one's top. I think really if there is any way your and your hubby could afford to rent a house or an apt on your own it would stop all that stuff.as they are sort of indian givers they give but with strings attached all the time. it gets really unpleasant after a while .who wants to be constantly critized
for things. move out on your own if you can.
1 person likes this
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
24 Feb 12
Hi, thanks for your response. Yeah, I think we should really think about moving in our own house or apartment soon. I realized a long time ago, that this kind of criticisms will never go away until we finally have our own house. The part of it that I realy hate is that they seem so close minded they only want to see what they want to see. They haven't seen the things I have done and I have been extra efforts everytime I have free time. I really should get some help from my hubby but I gave up a long time ago, because I guess you can't really wring that out of them (guys) to be clean all the time. We have fought several times about this, cause I don't usually cause all the mess in the house but its him. So I clean and it happens again. I can only do much when it's my free time and I am not getting pretty much free time since I have to work really hard to save up money. Today though, I cleaned the whole house because they are coming. I hope I did a great job at scrubbing and wiping everything inside the house. Thanks you guys! Hoping I'll be posting a discussion about me having my own house in the future.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
24 Feb 12
I haven't really experienced the same thing. i am tired and I have been having trouble getting all of the housework done but at least my husband does half the work, so there is less of it.
1 person likes this
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
24 Feb 12
Your lucky to have a hubby who really cooperates with you. Good luck with everything.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
23 Feb 12
I think I can understand why they would be criticizing you. I guess it's there home and has been for many years and they want the same standards they have for their own fulltime home. I don't know, I guess I would be wanting to come back / home to a clean house too, but I'd also have to understand you work a lot. It also could be that they want you to do better for / by their son? I am not sure. That sounds awful but that is the way some inlaws think.
I hope you can get it cleaned a little bit and to their liking. Maybe do some cleaning and take a nap, get back up and do some more.
1 person likes this
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
23 Feb 12
I clean that's for sure. But they have too high standards that sometimes its not right anymore. They only see what they want to see. I guess the reason I am venting out here is because I can't vent out anywhere else. I guess it's just unfair for women to be treated that way by the in laws. I guess it's just normal since I live in their house. That's why I need to work hard to get myself my own place so I won't be reacting this way.
1 person likes this
@lologirl2021 (5542)
• United States
24 Feb 12
Well i dont have my own house either and its hard. My boyfriend lives with his parents and i live with my parents but we stay together every night at someones house. Now this is hard on us because we dont have our own bedroom and what not and i think its hard on us and its also very stressfull. Now that i hope to be getting a hosue this year my parents are always complaining i have stuff everywhere and so much stuff to get rid of and its actually alot of stuff and i know it is but i can only do so much.
My parents expect the laudnry to be done and the house to be cleaned as well by me since i still do live at home and now my boyfriends parents are a little different since he is a man he doesnt clean but i do clean his room and bathroom and do his laundry so i think hes pretty lucky to have me around so it does get done and i dont have to depend on his mom to do it all the time.
@sourabharoy1992 (730)
• India
24 Feb 12
Not like that! But i sfferd another types.
1 person likes this
@choybel (5042)
• Philippines
23 Feb 12
I am not living with in-laws as of now, as a matter of fact, I have just left home and live with a friend and the cleaning part is usually done by somebody else so I believe I have a better situation. Anyway, maybe you could ask help from your husband so that your job will be a little lighter and the tasks will be done a little sooner.
