How do you deal people who are narrow minded and judgemental?
By ardoy0731
@ardoy0731 (7308)
Philippines
February 25, 2012 10:33am CST
I do have a co worker who eventually became a friend as days go by.I didn't expect that he is telling quite not good about me to other people through chat.He is a bit older with me about 6 years or so.Every time I try to approach him about work that he always quite done wrong,I always approach him in joking ways to avoid conflict or whatsoever and the fact that he is older than me.The same mistakes is always happen every month which really pissed me off.He don't do his work seriously.So I approach him in quite serious way with respect cause he is older so that the problem will not occur monthly.Of course he do it and I assume that we are okay.As of this day I found out that he chatted a common friend of us telling that I'm quite acting to be a boss to him in telling his mistake to avoid the delay on my part.I think he should focus on his work rather that surfing the net and Facebook almost all the time.He also noticing me wearing polo saying that I'm feeling to be a boss.What? Wearing a polo means I'm a boss hahaha shame on him cause he can't wear polo.Even answering a phone is also an issue for him.
Why just he focus in his work rather than doing facebook to avoid conflict and delay to other people.Why does he just accept mistake constructively for him to learn the next time rather that retaliating and saying hearsay to other people.
I'm so sick and tired of doing other people works and correcting their mistakes but in the end I will suffer to their judgement?
7 responses
@berting600 (3453)
• Philippines
25 Feb 12
You can not just say that they are judgmental or narrow minded because they are having some bad experiences from other people.Please give some space for these types of people then ask them what you can do to help them with what problems they have,so do not be pissed with what they have cause you if you like they could become your good buddies in your work place.The you could become good friends later.Remember that they are more senior than you are that is why they also need some support and respect.If you do so they would realized that you are one of their pal.
@ardoy0731 (7308)
• Philippines
25 Feb 12
Actually we are friends that's why I'm shocked when I knew about things that he said to other after all those help and things done to him.I'm not counting those things but don't just say things about me that is not true just because I'm trying to correct his wrong.
1 person likes this
@berting600 (3453)
• Philippines
25 Feb 12
You are actually doing what I intend you to do these types of people.You would be realized by them that they are wrong to deeds in spite of what they have done to you.
You would be rewarded for your deeds so keep it up.You did not know that someone else have known what was happening and that you will just tell me that I am right to just calm down and all these things would come to halt by itself.
@giggles721 (275)
• Philippines
26 Feb 12
so you're not his superior, right? i guess you should just report him to your superior if his actions are affecting your job. honestly you can't help people like them and what's best to do is act professionally when at work with him. outside the work place if he's still acting up then just ignore him. the more attention you give him, the more that he would think that he's successful in irritating you. ^_^
@lampar (7584)
• United States
26 Feb 12
May be give him your thumb for him to suck and then tell him to lick your toes will solve the problem you have with judgemental and narrow minded people in the work place. That is all it take to deal with people with such personality without wasting too much of your time and feeling sick anymore .
@tipay26 (867)
• Philippines
26 Feb 12
If I were you my friend I will talk to him once more but this time not as a friend but as a co-worker.Maybe the reason why he is not taking work seriously is because he knew that you are always there for him to solve his problems regarding his neglected works.Try to make him feel that you two are different I mean try to make him feel that you have your own tasks and try not to help him with it so that he will do his work .Try not to remind him of everything besides you are not his assistant to do just work right?.Let him do the slacking he will be reprimanded by your department head I'm sure of that!.In other words let him be.Just do what you are told to do in your work if he talks behind your back let him do that eventually if what he is spreading is not true, it will not cause you harm right?Just work hard on your part don't help him he is old enough to know what is right and what is wrong.You two have separate lives my friend even if you are friends and I don't call that type of person friend.A user I would say. :)
@abmacasinag (518)
• Philippines
26 Feb 12
You cannot control how people react towards other people. It's either do what the romans do or tell the romans what to do but the simplest is ignoring them and continue doing what you think is right. Don't let it stress you out for it wasn't worth it.
@Leeper (79)
• South Africa
25 Feb 12
Creating and maintaining new boundaries may be your best bet. Leave him, he is digging a hole for himself. He may need to fall in it and dig himself out before he learns his lesson. I am sure you wanted to help him, as you sound kind, but some people do not want to be helped - he needs to learn at his own pace.
Just do not allow him to hold YOU back. This is why boundaries are so important. It will allow you to function successfully as unfazed by him as possible.
We reap what we sow. He will see the light...one day, but that is his path, not yours. Just do your work, simplify by identifying by what is most important....and leave the rest.
Life will reward you ~.
@vt689586 (584)
• India
25 Feb 12
dealing with that person who are narrow minded are not easy task to do.narrow minded people are very complex actually and it is very hard to understand what are they thinking.and if you are telling that kind of person about their fault then it could become more problematic for you to handle them.well i ignore that kind of people who does not want to accept their faults and think that they are best.
