never thought i'm useless...

Aw, well, she should appreciate that you're trying to help even if you may be doing things 'wrong'. It sounds like she is critical and takes you for granted in a way. It's hard to feel appreciated when you are with someone like that, I know that from experience as well. Don't be so hard on yourself though, you're not useless. It's nice that you are trying to help your partner - if only they could appreciate it for what it is. Good luck to you...

don't feel useless about that and yeah no one is useless . its just she doesn't believe in you . don't just see the cover of the book open the book turn the pages and read it . by crying your making yourself weak .make her realise and feel that you can really take care of her . people take care of everyone but how special you take care of her she wants that.

o dear... i sure hope that in the 2 weeks that has passed after you've posted this discussion, you are much better now. maybe your partner just wanted a time for herself... maybe she has concerns too... hopefully you and your partner could make it up and communicate so things like this do not happen again. and you could be happier

Don't feel bad or useless. Your partner refusing you to care for her might just be because she doesn't want to be a burden on you and doesn't want to disturb you. It might not have anything to do with her feeling you are useless and can't care for her. Also, sometimes when we are sick we become somewhat irritant and want to be left alone. This might be the case with your partner. So, just be patient with her or talk to her about how you feel and tell her that taking care of her will make you feel happy...

You know what? First really believe in urself that ur NOT useless... If your partner doesn't seem to understand the goodness in you, even then don't stop. You should continue doing what you are doing. In our religion, we believe in doing good things without expecting anything in return. Keep this in mind & do what you need to do to keep your partner comfortable.

don't feel useless about that and yeah no one is useless . it just she doesn't believe in you . don't just see the cover of the book open the book turn the pages and read it . by crying your making yourself weak .make her realise and feel that you can really take care of her .

I do..feel your pain, here! But, I truly hope you will re-think how you are feeling about yourself! As you are not useless! I am hoping that what I say, will help you to understand, and feel better! I, TOO, do not wish anyone around me when I am feeling ill! I am cranky, and embarassed that I am ill...and just want to be alone! Some people are just like that, and it has nothing to do with you. Even tho' you have cared for many sick persons...this is much more personal! Time is a great healer..take care of yourself, so you can spoil her when she is feeling better!

Hi kaeirole: That's really sad. Don't tell yourself that you are useless because you aren't. You are a beautiful person who has feelings. You are very important just as you are. Be honest with your girl. Maybe she doesn't understand how important this is for you and how you exactly feel. Communication is very important in every relationship. ALVARO

The feeling of being useless is yours, it's personal. Nobody can give you that feeling only you. This is not about the fact you took care of so many people, or perhaps it is. Personally I would not like it either if my partner would take care of me if I was seriously ill. It would be annoying to me and I can't bear people around me if I am sick (my partner or children). I want to be alone so I can be in pain alone, so I don't need to be friendly, I don't have to deal with my partner or children who feel sad or sorry for me and try to comfort me. Also a big issue to me: the cheering up! They want you to feel happy, smile.. which is impossible if you are seriously sick. Being sick cost a lot of energy, it eats you. there is no energy left over to be kind, friendly to smile, to make jokes. Also each touch, each word said would take me out of my concentration of ignoring the pain as much as possible. So please leave me alone if i am seriously sick, in terrible pain. I have my hands full of me, full of ignoring the pain as much as possible I am not able to pay any attention to someone else. Each touch, each sound is pulling me out of my concentration and only causes me more and more pain. Which will harm me more and makes it harder for me to recover.

Don't feel useless. Even don't blame her..usually when we fall sick, we become irritated. She does not want to take advice when she is not well. It happens... Just leave her alone for sometime...everything will be fine when she will feel better..

Is this the only situation where she rejects your effort to take care of her? I cannot know for sure. But I will give you some of my thoughts why she rejects you in this situation. One, she maybe feeling useless herself, so she do not want you to take care of her because she want to do it herself. Being sick can make a person feel helpless and useless. And for someone who is brought up to be independent or been independent for long, it can be an issue. Second, maybe you are a busy person and she views herself as a burden to you whenever she gets sick. Third, maybe she is just having a bad day because she is sick and wants some time for herself. If she gets better you might want to discuss it with her. But if it happens all the time like the pointing out of your mistakes and if your doing the same to her it its better to sit and talk again and re evaluate your relationship. You will never be happy if you are overpowered by your partner to a point when you feel like you are useless. Take care! Hope things will get better soon.