My child's bed time is wrong
By C
@ShyBear88 (59347)
Sterling, Virginia
March 14, 2012 10:32pm CST
Wow, I was just told that my daughter needs to go to bed at 7pm. This person asked what time my kids go to bed and how they wanted there kids to go to bed earlier at 7pm and then don't go to bed till 9pm.
My daughter she goes to bed no matter where we are at by 9pm every night since she was 4 months old. I don't think that is wrong time for my daughter to go to bed. The reason why is because one I gave birth to her, two she has a different sleeping habit and routine then other peoples kids, three she doesn't have school yet because she is 13.5 months old. She goes to bed at the same time as my nephew that is 4 1/2 years old and goes to school 3 times a week.
I would never tell a parent that they need to put there child down to bed earlier or later then mine. Its there house there kids they can run bed time there way. If the kids go to sleep with out a fuss or right then that is great. I'm sticking to what works for me and my husband. My husband gets off of work at 5pm he isn't home till almost 6pm. So I give him a 3 full hours with our daughter before she goes to bed. Some nights she gets a bath before bed but not ever night. I feel nobody has any rights to say how I raise my daughter, when she goes to bed or what she eats if they didn't help in the making her.
This person is having trouble getting there kids to bed that are much older then mine in at 7pm okay that is there problem not mine and they will need to find out how to do that. Every parent has a set bed time and some don't have any at all.
When I was a kid my parents never had a bed time for me and my brothers it was when ever we wanted to go to sleep and we learned what time we need to go to sleep that worked for our bodies. Not once did my parents say you need to go to bed now. They might have said you need to start settling down getting ready for bed or you might want to go to bed early. As me and my brothers go older we normally listened to our parents suggestions if not it was our own fault. I remember some nights I just couldn't go to sleep when I wanted to. I still don't go to bed when I want to. I live and sleep off of my daughter's sleeping. Now we have a routine down which took a few months to get going since she was my first baby. Now with my second baby I'm going to try to get on the same routine as my daughter as soon as possible but that might not work right way since more newborns like to sleep 2 to 3 hours at time some sleep more or less then that. But I do want by the time 4 months come around they are sleeping in bed by 9pm like there big sister.
2 people like this
9 responses
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
21 Mar 12
I think that it doesn't really matter what time your kid goes to bed so long as they get enough sleep. For the longest time my son went to bed each night at 6pm and woke up at 5:30 am. People kept telling me to keep him up later but if I kept him up later, he would wake up even earlier. He just naturally has his own sleep cycle.
Now he goes to sleep at around 9pm and wakes up around 7:30am. When he reaches school age, I will enforce a bedtime because he needs to get enough sleep for school, but for now, so long as he gets enough sleep, I don't care. And if people want him to have a different bedtime, they can come and deal with my overtired child.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
23 Mar 12
Fighting over sleep is a losing battle, I think. then again, maybe the person who was telling you your child needs to go to bed earlier had met a lot of people who were keeping their kids up late so that it would be more convenient for them. For my son, no matter what time he goes to bed at, he will get up for the day around 6am now. So we try to get him to bed earlier so he gets more sleep. We're trying to get him to go to sleep around 8pm because we think he is outgrowing his naps. (he's been napping for shorter and shorter lengths of time).
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
23 Mar 12
This person was having there own issues getting there kids to go to be at 7pm and they go to bed instead at 9pm. I told that person you kind of have control of that. You can put them in bed at 7pm if they need to go to bed early for something but you can't really force your kid to sleep. You want them to go to sleep by that won't make them go to sleep. Just put them in there room or were ever and shut the door give it the right setting for sleeping and leave them be.
I put my daughter down at 9pm normally she'll lay down with no fuss other nights maybe a little bit. But after a few minutes she stops goes to sleep. I do the same for nap time. Its easy to see when she is sleepy and some times she doesn't think she is tired till she lays down. I know my daughters routine its been this way for a while now.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
22 Mar 12
My daughter has a set bed time that is it. I think for my daughter going to bed at 9pm works best for her because she'll sleep till 7am to 9am some days it just depends on how much sleep she needs. I've had her get up at 4am so nights and stay up till 7am and go back to bed. I've had her bet up at 7am and go back to bed at 9 or 10 which if she goes to sleep at 10am or later its normally nap time so she'll sleep like 45 minutes to an 2 hours. Which is fine with me right now with me being pregnant I'm not going to fight with her over nap time too much.
@Mashnn (4501)
•
15 Mar 12
Nobody has the right to tell you how you should bring up your daughter. Sometimes, I am amazed by people who thinks they are expert when it comes to child upbringing but when you look at their child/children, there is nothing to show/brag about. Tell her that you have your routine and you need no one to dedicate to you how and what you you need to do.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
15 Mar 12
I wasn't a she but a he I think I didn't check to there see if they where male or female but they had a picture of a grown man that is much older then me so I"m assuming its a guy. I just told them well if you where in labor with my daughter for 16 hours and gave half of her dna to her to make her then you have a say in how she is raised and stuff. My husband leaves my daughters scheduling to me because I'm home with her all day ever day. What we have I believe in my heart is right for her. Maybe as she gets older her bed time might change as she gets into school and when it starts.
I feel when its your kids you have a say in how things are run with that child other wise your thoughts on how should stay to your self. A nice suggestion like I would have tried a little bit early that is fine but to say my child needs to go to bed earlier they have no right to. That is between me my husband and maybe even her doctor.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
21 Mar 12
No one has a right to tell you that your children's bedtime is wrong because what is ideal for one family is probably not what will be ideal for another family.
For example, my children go to bed at 10 in the evening. The reason that is their bedtime is because of the fact that their father doesn't get home from work until later in the evening and I like for them to be able to spend time with their dad. Also, my daughter doesn't have to get up for school until seven in the morning, so she is getting nine hours of sleep every day.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
21 Mar 12
I agree every family is different. I want my daughter and husband to spend time together after he gets home. I think its unfair if I put our daughter to bed at 7 he only gets what and hour with her then vs at 9. 9 has always been her bed time since she was like 4 months old.
Some kids need more sleep then others. My kid is only 1 years old and she'll sleep till 7am till some times 9 depending on how much sleep she needs that night. I dont' wake her up in the morning unless I have to for some reason.
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
15 Mar 12
you are right. we cannot tell a parent how to raise their children because we have our own ways. same is true with sleeping time. i have a 20-month old son that goes to bed by 8-8:30pm. but lately he will sleep later than that maybe because he is active and has high energy and that he missed playing with us since we are working all day. we cannot impose an accurate and precise time a child can sleep because it will depend upon the child, how tired he is or how much energy she still needs to consume. children will never be the same and that what is good with you will never be that good to others.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
17 Mar 12
Right. What works for me doesn't work for others. Some babies and children need to go to bed early and others later. My daughter has always gone to bed at 9pm since she was 4 months old. That is what worked for me and my husband also at that age my husband was working crazy outs at a bad job. But now he has a good job and he only gets to see our daughter for 3 hours a day on a weekday weekends he see her all day. But she knows as soon as daddy gets home she has him to herself. She has me all day long since I don't work. Her routine works for me and her and my husband. I hope to get our second child on the same kind of routine as my daughter or as close to it as possible. I let my daughter sleep as long as she needs to at night time. Day time its a bit different I only let her sleep 2 hours in the day time for a nap unless she is sick.
@asyria51 (2861)
• United States
18 Mar 12
Every kid has a different schedule, and as long as she is getting somewhere in the recommended amount of sleep for her age, just ignore the other people. My daughter goes to be earlier, but I have to get her up early in the morning so I can get her to the sitter and to work on time.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
18 Mar 12
That to me is reasonable because you have to get to work and you have someone to take care of your daughter in the day time. I don't know if my daughter sleeps the amount that the doctors say she needs. I normally let her sleep till she wakes up in the morning and then I start my day. But bed time and nap time are the same time ever day and nap time is only about a hour to 2 hours depending on how tired she is cause some days she is more tired then others of if she sick then I let her sleep longer for her nap past 2 hours.
@mauve02 (133)
• Philippines
15 Mar 12
My baby sleeps whenever he wants to sleep. I never forced him to sleep for a particular time. I tried to forced him before to sleep but he just cried from then on I always let him sleep in any time he wants.
Babies or infants ages zero til six or seven months has different sleeping patterns, that is what I have noticed when my baby sleeps. We are always awake early in the morning. But since he reached his 8 months old til now that he is 1 year old he sleeps at night depends on the time he wakes up in the morning and length of time he sleeps in the afternoon.
I think those who go to school should a specific time to sleep so that they will have enough sleep and have the energy to go so school. :)
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
17 Mar 12
Me as mom I could never let my daughter sleep when ever she wants other wise then that I would never get sleep and either would my husband for that matter because one or both of us would always be tired.
Most baby should be on some kind of routine because they should be sleeping through the night by the time they are 1 or a little bit after that. I've always had my daughter on a sleeping routine for bed by the time she was 4 months old. I don't like her crying either no parent does but I know its good for her other wise she would be by me 24/7 and I wouldn't be sleeping in my bed with just my husband.
Its really nice for me to have some kind of routine down. She goes to bed at 9pm, get up between 7am and 9am. I don't wake up in the morning unless I have to for like a doctor appointment or something like that where we have to get up. She eats breakfast at about the same time every day even on the weekend. The either lunch and then nap or nap and then lunch depending on if she tired. Normally she is ready for a nap by 11am no late then 12pm. Then gets up has a snack. Daddy comes home we eat dinner and then of to bed. This way she is ready for school because I'm sending her this year when she turns two to preschool well more like prek for 2 years. This way I can have a better handle with out stressing about what to do with my daughter when I have my other baby to take care and I'm going to put him or her on the same routine or close too it.
What works for you would never work for me. Not after being a preschool teacher for some times and being in the house with my nephew he never had a bed time and he never slept in his bed till last year because in perschool and he doesn't go to bed when he should because he isn't really use to it and its no inforced. although my brother and his wife wouldn't care if my nephew cried all day or night they wouldn't do a darn thing. To me I look at those to as the bad example of parenting and for me what not to do. He is suppose to go to bed at 9pm the same time as my daughter but most all nights he never does not even on the night he doesn't have school. He only has school 3 days a week because its special education class.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
15 Mar 12
I always believe that all parents are responsible for their own children so whatever way they want to train their children it is up to them. They are accountable to them anyway so it is not for me to insist whatever I think is good or not.
As for me, I believe kids should sleep early so they could have at least 8 up to 10 hours of sleep. This is good for their health. I always believe in this saying: "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise." So I did train my only child to go to bed early when he was a kid. On or before 8 pm he should be on bed with me so that we could pray and I could tell him Bible stories that would put him to sleep.
Now I have no kids at home for my son is already a grown up man but there are few little ones that frequent my home. They are my grandchildren by my niece and nephew but they normally don’t sleepover so I could not really discipline them when it comes to bedtime. They have parents anyway who should do that for them.
I always believe that all parents are responsible for their own children so whatever way they want to train their children it is up to them. They are accountable to them anyway.
As for me, I believe kids should sleep early so they could have at least 8 up to 10 hours of sleep. This is good for their health. I always believe in this saying: "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise." So I did train my only child to go to bed early when he was a kid. On or before 8 pm he should be on bed with me so that we could pray and I could tell him Bible stories that would put him to sleep.
Now I have no kids at home for my son is already a grown up man but there are few little ones that frequent my home. They are my grandchildren by my niece and nephew but they normally don’t sleepover so I could not really discipline them when it comes to bedtime. They have parents anyway who should do that for them.
I always believe that all parents are responsible for their own children so whatever way they want to train their children it is up to them. They are accountable to them anyway.@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
17 Mar 12
I see bed time as a discipline what ever works for one parent I know doesn't work for another parent. I feel that bed time is part of a young kids routine to what is going on in there day.
I never had a bed time when I was kid me and my brothers made up our own bed time. We always went to bed at a good time for bed. Our parent would suggestion that it was a good time to get ready and settle in for the night and by the time we where like 9 or so we knew what worked best for us. Of course me and my husband do it a bit differently. My daughter goes to bed at the same time as her cousin does and he's 4 years old.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
15 Mar 12
Well it actually depends on the parents what kind of discipline they want to impose on their children and this include bedtime. But as for me I always I believe kids should sleep early so they could have at least 8 up to 10 hours of sleep. This is good for their health. I always believe in this saying: "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise." So I did train my only child to go to bed early when he was a kid. On or before 8 pm he should be on bed with me so that we could pray and I could tell him Bible stories that would put him to sleep.
Now I have no kids at home for my son is already a grown up man but there are few little ones that frequent my home. They are my grandchildren by my niece and nephew but they normally don’t sleepover so I could not really discipline them when it comes to bedtime. I think it is their parents responsibility to do that, all that I could do is to advice. They could always take it or leave it.
They could always take it or leave it.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
15 Mar 12
It all depends on the age and every child is different and every bodies body needs different amount of sleep. I can't make my daughter sleep as long as I want. My brother and his wife they have tried that it doesn't work for them. Although my sister in law thinks her 4 year old should sleep all day long but he is 4 and not and infant.
I don't think early to bed makes any difference in a child life and that is from my own experiences. Bed time isn't part of discipline or punishment its part of routine that is need in a kids life. They need to know what is next to be done especially with really little kids because they can't tell time. My daughter gets all the sleep she needs. She sleeps till almost 8pm so she gets what she needs. I never wake her from sleep unless she is napping. Which she gets those 2 hours naps and if sick I letter sleep more. I like the routine we have and I stick to it because it works for my daughter she is grumpy or fussy. Some days she goes to bed before 9pm but that is the last that we would let her stay up. If she doesn't take a nap then she goes to bed early of course. My body needs 6 hours of sleep and with really young kids they have learned that kids don't need those 8 hours of sleep that is why they are normally up really early before the parents are even if they go to be at 7pm some kids are up at like 4am that is just there bodies clock.
Its really up to the parents and what they feel is right for there kids. That is there kids not my kids. If it works for them that is good and they should stick to it and if it doesn't work for them then they find one that does work not only for them but for kids. Teens need more sleep then little kids teens need about 9 hours of sleeps. This is why a lot of school now have high school later in the day and elementary school earlier in the day because of sleep need.
I'm a night owl like my husband and I think our kids will be too and if not then we will fine something that works for them.
@crimsonladybug (3112)
• United States
15 Mar 12
I know a lot of people let their kids stay up later so they will sleep in later. The truth is, doctors, specialists, whatever may say that kids need 9-10 hours of sleep a night but they'll only sleep for as long as their body lets them and then they'll get up. It's just how they're programmed. So a lot of parents figure out, okay, my kid naturally sleeps for 8 hours and I don't want her to get up before 7, I need to put her to bed between 10 and 11. Everyone around them will have a fit but when the compromise is between putting the kid to bed at 7 and everyone in the house getting up at 4 in the morning because the kid is up and rearing to go, or putting the kid to bed at 11, I'd tell "everyone" to stick it in their ear...
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
16 Mar 12
I let my daughter sleep as long as she wants. I'm a night hour so I don't got to bed till almost 1am some nights. Normally by 12am both me and my daughter will go to bed at 9pm its just a good time when she is tried and if she is tired before then then we put her down to bed really. But normally she isn't ready for bed till 9pm and she'll take a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. She is normally up between 7am and 9am depending if she took two naps or 1 nap and if she wakes up in the middle of the night or not. We went off what worked for us when she 4 months old and that was the best time and she normally sleep most all the way through the night since them.
