Friend who betrayed you
By TheIzers
@TheIzers (680)
March 17, 2012 6:44am CST
I have this friend for about three years, first she was my colleague before I moved to other state. Two years ago I found out that she was out of work due to the budget cut so as a friend I though about helping her. make the story short we then decided to make business together, as she did not had money so I invest the money and she took care the business and we split the income by 2. So there I gave her my couple thousands of dollar for she could started the business. First month, two months , three months went by I did not hear from her so I asked her for the report once I asked the report she give me the report but she said we still not making money so she can't send me any. I have no problem with that as long as I got the report. But this habit is repeatedly all the time, she never send me report unless I ask her. So it's finally about six months ago I never heard anything from her no more, no email no phone nothing. So I decided not become friend with her anymore. I was so mad, do you think I should keep my friendship or just forget it??? is it my fault that she stop talk to me?
2 people like this
10 responses
@free_man (7330)
• United States
17 Mar 12
Hi TheIzers and welcome to my lot. Sorry that this happened to you. My dad taught me a very valuable lesson when I was a small child, never loan money to friends or family if you ever want to see it again. Cause friends and family seem to think that when you loan them money that it is a gift. The only way you will probably ever get that money back is to take her to small claims court and you need real proof that you loaned her money! I would take this as a lesson learned. If you ever hear from her again (which it sounds like won't happen) I would ask her for the money back and if she don't give it back I would ask for a report every month. Again my friend so sorry this happened to you but next time a friend ask to borrow money you need to make a written contract with them. I would have it notarized by a legal notary, always keep records just in case you have to go to court. Maybe your friend thinks you just gave the money to her.
@TheIzers (680)
•
18 Mar 12
Thanks for sharing the lesson your dad told you. I will learn from it in the future. It was never be a gift. We supposed to work together, I came up with 100% of the money and she came up with time and energy. I don't have a legal receipt it's all based on trust, the only thing I have is the proof that I have transferred the money to her. But again, I don't think about bring her to court. I don't feel like making the situation any worse than what it is already as I feel loosing a friend.
1 person likes this
@free_man (7330)
• United States
18 Mar 12
Hi TheIzers. I am so sorry again that it happened to you sounds like you are a real nice person. And the nice people in this world always get walked all over by people like your so called friend. In these days and times no ones word is worth anything I found that out from my last divorce. Wish you all the luck in the world my friend!
@Cherish14 (2693)
• Philippines
17 Mar 12
that's nice of you for being so kind and understanding to your friend but i think what she did is already enough. if you keep helping her, she is not going to learn from her mistakes and will just keep abusing you.
i had friends who were like that but i got rid of them. i put them in the past already and i don't want anything to do with them anymore. we see each other sometimes but i know myself now. i can't be nice all the time then just get abused by people who are supposed to be my friends.
he decision is still yours, but i just want you to be cautious because she might do it again and take advantage of you again.
@Cherish14 (2693)
• Philippines
18 Mar 12
that's alright. i understand. that's how i feel too sometimes, i miss those times that we have spent together but i just don't want all the crap to happen again because i don't wanna go through that again. i am just being careful.
just give it some more time, and it will pass by. time will come that she will realize what she did too. but if you really can't get over it, then i guess you can get in contact with her and see what happens after that. good luck and i hope it goes well 
@TheIzers (680)
•
18 Mar 12
This is what actually I have done. Just left her and have nothing to do with her but recently I kind of miss the time we had together in the past and don't know how to fix the whole thing. that is why I shared this here for I can get some opinion from others at mylot.
@nurseclare (2209)
• Philippines
18 Mar 12
that's pretty tough, it is hard to make money with a friend. You are very nice to help her out but she's not good enough for you. It'a her, she's the big fat problem. It will be so hard to patch up and i bet you have thousands dollars now so better get off her and forget about the money if you can....
Next time don't trust easily and be careful with your friends. Ask GOD to give you trust worthy friends..
@EwanScarlette (51)
• Singapore
18 Mar 12
It't not your fault at all , you helped out, and you did the right thing, its ok about it, don't have to keep that kind of friendship, you should see it as a different angle, a true friend would see you as a help buds . If she cease communications with you , and don't wish to contact you in the near future, then i would simply suggest you to move on with other friends too.
@honest_efforts100 (1607)
• India
27 Jun 12
I believe that friendship should not be mixed with business. Money is a bad motivator to betray a friend’s trust. It is human nature that we get greedy or lured by money. It is not your fault that she stopped talking to you. She does not want to talk to you for probably she is already guilty of mismanagement of the fund you entrusted to her.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
18 Mar 12
I don't think you should keep her as a friend but you should probably find out what happened to your money.
@lynboobsy11 (11343)
• Philippines
17 Mar 12
That's the problem with us sometimes that we really trust a friend and somehow they take for granted us. I have lots of experienced trough my friends that involved money. One thing that I learned from this if you want to keep your friendship long don't make a money an issue. If you want to help a friend just for lending, consider it as a give and expect that it will not return. But if it does were luck enough because she is a good friend with dignity and pride. In your situation don't expect that your friend will return the money that you invested in the business because it's all gone. The important thing is that you already knew her on what attitude she has. Someday she will realize why she deceive you and she is the one who lost a good friend and not you.
@TheIzers (680)
•
18 Mar 12
Yes you are right, when some of my friends borrow some money most of the time I consider it as a gift and I didn't expect it to get back. I remember I was so surprise couple years ago when one of my friends from college suddenly visited me and return money that I have forgot borrowed him long time ago. It was kind of funny and cool in the same time that people still remember what I did for the when I have already forgotten. The thing is I expected for getting my share with her because this wasn't a loan in the beginning, it was a business partner. I came up money and she came up with time and energy. I wish she just ask for loan back then so it would be easier for me not to expect return.
@Ghajini (776)
• Philippines
17 Mar 12
That's really nice of you, helping a friend who is in need. However, those things really happen, it's really sad if your friendship will be broken because of financial issues. I don't know who's fault it is, but the best thing to do I guess is try to talk to her for the last time and discuss some of the issues. Nevertheless, if she keeps on avoiding you, I guess you have no choice but to accept it and just hope that in time, she'll realize her mistakes and talk again to you to ask forgiveness.
@trinkabelle (432)
•
17 Mar 12
try and contact her one more time and if she doesn't reply, let her know that you are folding your half of the deal and she can go it alone, i run a small jewellery business and i would never involve a 2nd party for this reason, doing business with friends can break a friendship, even with family it's a risky business, you helped her out and she has not even returned any calls or reports, so it seems that you are the one doing all the work and she is reaping in the rewards, if you do business with someone it has to be a 50/50 thing, not a one sided thing, why not go it alone and let her fend for herself from now on
