We are not that Close Anymore
By cearn25
@cearn25 (3456)
Philippines
March 20, 2012 12:29am CST
We all have friends. Right? I do have plenty and I can say only a few I have been close with. The closeness was tight that no one can tear our friendship apart. I consider them true friends. They are my neighbors! They are my childhood friends. I remember in the past, we are so close to each other. We would go to their house and have fun. We would hang out. We would have food trips and many, many more things to do.
Things change when we get old. There are conflicts which can not avoid. I don't want to discuss further the bad memories. But somehow, I have noticed that we are not close anymore. We don't greet and see each other. We are all busy with our own lives. Others have got married already.
I just reminisce the past and hope for the future to be okay having to be reunited once again. If not today, then I will wait. Let's make things better and settle the differences first before each one of us can move on.
I believe true friendship lasts. 
2 people like this
14 responses
@5mahi05 (666)
• India
20 Mar 12
That's true. i have experienced the same thing with my friends too. There were times when we were all together like this was the only world we had, and now is the time that we even find hard to greet each other. Life changes easily and as you said , sometimes you can never avoid the conflicts no matter what. All we can do is wait for the things to settle down. If all turns up fine, then great, else, all we can do is, let it go.
Remember, in life, every person enters your life only to teach you certain things. Once it is done, life takes them away from you. That is life.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
Life is full of surprises! I guess I just have to be ready for whatever life will take me. I don't want to pretend but I badly and madly miss my friends whom I can say I trusted more than myself. Friendship never fades. I still consider them as my friends although we have some differences. I know time will come and the pain will be eased.
@5mahi05 (666)
• India
20 Mar 12
That's the way life is and trust me, I am sure i know what you are going through right now because it is the same case with me too. I am also missing my friend, with whom the same thing happens. Sometimes I do feel that I should have trusted during the times our friendship was tested. May be a little more patience would have done. But whatever has happened has happened. We cannot turn the times back. Waiting is the only key available. At least we miss those friends.
@redvakaurvaki (4216)
• Indonesia
21 Mar 12
It can happen to anyone of us. I and my classmates during elementary school is like stranger each other.It even had been happen since long time ago, when we were on high school or not same school anymore. I love the memories when we were together but understand that this is procees of life that I can't hide. may be they had found friend who is more compatible and interisting than me, yeah hurt, but who knows?? I also now have friend who different with my childhood but I enjoy it.Old friend-New friend is common but always feel great when we standing together with our old friend who exactly through a lot of quality times together and know deeply who we are.I miss my old friend but know can hold them together anymore in one way street, but it's not too bad. I think sooner you can understand by walk together with your new friend. Keep move on
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
21 Mar 12
In our life, we meet many people. The new people we meet could either be our friend or just a by passer. I know you are hurt my friend. I can feel it. But I am proud of you because you have moved on and accept everything. That's life. We have to know how to control it.
@redvakaurvaki (4216)
• Indonesia
9 Apr 12
yeah, had move on exactly, but I always remember them -impossible to forget, we share a lot of moment together...
how about your feeling with your old friend now?
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
9 Apr 12
I also still can't forget those people whom I considered old friends. I remember too those joys we had, sorrows we suffered and those every little things we had shared. Now, I feel awkward. That is what I feel with them. I don't know why but I think maybe because there has been misunderstandings and differences. We haven't settled out that yet.
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
22 Mar 12
True friendship do last, especially those that can withstand the test of time. Childhood friends can't considered as close friends because when we are young, we see things differently from now, exposure are different too and that might change our perspective to things as well. True friends will not turn each other away just because of difference in opinion. True friends will stand to their views and understanding of things, yet respecting the other party's opinions too. It's a give and take thing, that's how and what close friends are about
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
22 Mar 12
You are absolutely right with your points my friend. It is much different now that before. When we were still a child, things aren't that complicated. We are jut care free and wanted to enjoy life. Now, there are so many conflicts arise which serves as a tests as what you have said. It is also to test the friendship. True friendship is when you after a long argument both of you and your friends finds yourselves laughing at the end of the day trying to forget what happened.
1 person likes this
@kaeirole (668)
• Philippines
21 Mar 12
true friendship do lasts..maybe you and your friends didn't maintain the closeness and the open communication as all of you grows..and it will always take some courage to stand and approach a friend about it..if you have the courage, then you can make a move just to settle the unsettled things between you and your friends..maybe through it, closeness will be back again..
@sabado_dc (1001)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
That's the usual repertoire of "true friends", true friends change and true friends do not want to incorporate many valuable things with friendship.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
21 Mar 12
Thanks for being at my side. I appreciate it so much. Aside from the insights you have added, I have realized that true friends shouldn't talk each others back. If they hear bad things about a true friend from people, it would be much more better if they just don't react on it or judge the person directly. Consult the person first before judging.
@sabado_dc (1001)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
"I have proven that true friends have also their ups and downs"
--We all have ups and downs.
"It doesn't mean having a true friends mean all is well and perfect. No, it is not....."
--I agree and I would want to add that true or real friends are the persons most noble in character and dealings with fellow humans not just in a friend cycle but treat the rest in a gracious and just manner. Staying at sufficient distance may or may not necessary, yet treating everybody in a noble and kind manner is required.
@livetrent (52)
• Australia
22 Mar 12
As we go through life we will make friends and break friends. As we grow we have different hobbies, jobs and interest and with this comes new friends and the decrease of the old ones. You hope that all your close friendships last but this is unrealistic. Even if you put in the effort to save the friendship sometimes they don't do the same.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
22 Mar 12
How negative those thoughts are! I am expecting for a more positive outlook. Anyway, it is good to hear another side of the story. Sometimes real friendships would end like nothing and everything will put into bury of forget. I guess we just have to accept this reality in life.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
21 Mar 12
I think sometimes people also just grow apart. They don't have the same interests or the same things in common anymore.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
21 Mar 12
You are right. People have their own decisions in life which is far from the decisions of others. I could say that there is no decisions alike. We take our own path. But I know somewhere in the path, people will cross and greet each other. The only thing we have to do now is to respect and accept every decision of a person.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
20 Mar 12
True friendship is something that can withstand the test of time. It is something that is timeless and there are few people with whom we are able to have friendships that are like this.
For me, I've really only got four friends that I would consider to be my true friends. The first of these is a friend that I've had since I wasn't even in school, she is also my son's godmother. The second is a friend that I made in middle school and got close to when I was in high school. The third and fourth are friends that I made when I was in college and lost contact with for 10 years but we got back in contact last year and it is like no time has passed since the last time that we'd talked.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
True friends could be anybody. They could be a classmate, a cousin, a neighbor or even an animal like a dog. A friend who is true knows how to comfort you in times of distress. Thanks Dorannmwin for sharing to me your true friends. I am delighted to have been shared.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
20 Mar 12
It's amazing how many friends can become distant even in years ago we would say we wouldn't. I'm sure it's normal and people just change, we all do and I stopped to think that it wasn't even the friend but I was the one that changed.
For example I had a very best friend and was always there for her, years later I realized (it took one year calling, asking to go out) that she wasn't there for me. I just didn't see before. Now I feel she lost, I didn't.
@angelgee14 (462)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
I understand and I agree.I have childhood friends whom I share a lot of things and have fun in the past. And as we grow old,the closeness seems to drift away due to changes in interests and some did really changed (attitude and behavior).I cannot blame those changes, especially the ones who really get rich and too far too reach. However, there are few of them who become successful and also become rich and too wealthy but never changed. What saddens me is, one of those people who did changed a lot is my bestfriend. We're like sister and shared so many things in the past, but now she don't even communicate to any of us. It hurts, but there is nothing I can do.
I am still happy to have few friends who are really true friends in it's essence.
Yes, true friends remains true and will always be true as time goes by.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
Yes, my friend. They seem to be so far already that we can't reach them anymore with the tendency of forgetting who we are and the experiences being together. I am still thankful that I had them and being part of my childhood memories. I know it hurts but we have to accept the truth. Thanks!
@dazzledlady (1618)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
Yes it is true sometime the time and distance can play a part in the level of friendship we have to other people. It is just sad when through time instead of getting closer you drifted apart. And through distance the communication gets lesser and then you can fade away.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
This mean to say that there are many factors which have been the cause of the drifting friendship. I would say also that these are just trials to test how strong we are. Communication is very vital in every relationship. Their must be constant communication every now and then.
@sherrybelle (707)
• United States
20 Mar 12
There is a shelf life for relationships and friendships. When people grow apart it's important to flow with that and allow our beloved friends to move on.
If we can release our friends and loved ones in a very kind way we will always have an eternal friendship even if we live separate lives.
The most important thing is to let people go without 'burning our bridge' with them.
@maratus (184)
• Indonesia
21 Mar 12
Yeah I ever felt the same way like you, sometimes it feels hurt when I remember again about our friendship in the past and now we act like we really don't know each other. Sometimes I wish I can turn back time and make up everything, but sometimes I also say my grateful to God that he already show me who is really friend and who is really not...,
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
21 Mar 12
I am so agree with you because I didn't expect all the things I have realized today. Just like you, I have found out also who are those people true to us and those people only want something from us. I am really saddened that they just use us. In fact, we are so good to them but it turned out they don't know how to do something in return of our goodness. 
@milony (5)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
I can so relate to this post! I've had childhood friends in the past who are now strangers. High School friends that I haven't met for a long time. We occasionally see each other on Facebook or on twitter. A message here. A short conversation there. But in the end we all just have our separate lives now. The adage "Friends come and go.." is as relevant now as it was since the beginning of time. It's sad because we never really see the real person behind the friends we've had. We only see a glimpse of them, only their passing. We just have to take it for what it is and be thankful for the memories. We all have affected each other one way or another. And that makes us miss them.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
20 Mar 12
I am grateful for you have relate to this post. I think many of us here can relate. We all have our own childhood experiences. They are the best of our lives as we can say. Indeed, we just have to be strong for life isn't as beautiful as has been before. The only thing we can do is to recall the things had happened. They are so nice.
