Should I keep the relationship with them?
By Polang
@tkonlinevn (6438)
Vietnam
March 24, 2012 12:28am CST
Previously, they used to be our neighbors. We helped them a lot because of their difficult circumstances than we do. They have to feed two children and one of them sick.
Now they have moved elsewhere. They sometimes call us. But I noticed that they only call us in times of trouble or they need money, in addition, they hardly touch.
As a neighbor, I must say that they only get care but they almost do not care about others. Even my husband to stay home because sick, they do not ask or help for my husband. When my brother was an accident, must be in the hospital, they did not visit. And there are so many other grievance things ...
Before, I think that I should keep good relations because they are our neighbors. Now they have moved away, I should keep a relationship with them? If you will think like?
2 people like this
9 responses
@jkct02 (2874)
• Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia
24 Mar 12
Yes, you should. Even though they have moved away, they are still somebody you know. Staying in good terms is better than not. Like you say, they were constantly living in difficult circumstances. They were always in trouble. They may have a bad time just to manage their own things in their family. That may have been the reason why they did not get in touch with you more. Just be friendly with them, as what you have been doing. Help them as much as you can. One day we all will get a good reward for all the good deeds we do today.
@tkonlinevn (6438)
• Vietnam
27 Mar 12
Maybe you're right. We should continue what we are doing. I think so. But I sometimes feel injustice because we care them but nobody care us ! Sad ! :(
1 person likes this
@jkct02 (2874)
• Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia
27 Mar 12
To give is more blessed than to receive. It means you have the ability to give. It means you are in a better position. While some people even if they want to give but they just don't have the means. Just take it positively. Helping others will provide us with inner peace and the love that we have for others will enrich us at the same time.
@pro_ojha (600)
• India
24 Mar 12
Hi tonlinen
Relationship should be grow on mutual basis. Not in one way manner. Any person ask for help to one who which is very near ( in relationship ) to him/her. You should watch they are greedy or needy. Then you should take any dis ion about them.
1 person likes this
@tkonlinevn (6438)
• Vietnam
27 Mar 12
Because this relationship don't have "mutual basic". So, I'm thinking about that "should I keep it or not". I don't think that they're greedy or needy, they only love people give them, they don't want to give others.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Even when they were neighbors, had I realized they were just using me, I'd have not kept in contact with them. I think that they depend on your help because they know they will get it. It's nice to keep in touch, but only if it's just to catch up. If it's for monetary gain for them, then I'd say no.
I'd let them make the next move, and I'd refuse any monetary help.
1 person likes this
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
24 Mar 12
I think you should keep on good terms with them, and help them if you can. Don't lend them any money though, and see if they still keep in touch with you or not. That way you can see if they were just using you for money, or if they just need someone to tell their troubles to.
1 person likes this
@nyang1984 (464)
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
what relationship you had with them just keep it that way even though they already moved somewhere else. it's good you're helping them because they are in the difficult circumstances but what makes it wrong is that you're kinda teaching them to be more dependent to you that is why i think you feel like they're just using you.
maybe you should try encourage them to find work or something good so that they can also support their needs and etc.
1 person likes this
@tkonlinevn (6438)
• Vietnam
27 Mar 12
I think that we should change the way we treat them. I think you're right. Maybe because we don't give them a chance to care us, right?
@Polgara (31)
• Germany
26 Mar 12
It is obvious that they have been using you. And maybe not only you, but other people as well. Now, when they have moved, you maybe should keep in touch with them, call them to ask them how they are, but carefully, don´t let them use you again. Or, you should maybe let them call you first. If they call you again only to ask another favor, then forget them. But if they call you to ask how you are, then you should keep in touch with them. It is nice to help others, but if they don´t care about you, that is called "using people". It has nothing to do with money, but with care and attention. It costs them nothing to call you and ask you how you are, how your husband was, and so on. DOn´t let them use you, maybe you can use that time to help someone who really needs and deserves it.
1 person likes this
@mjweed21 (693)
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
That doesn't mean that if they hardly keeping in touch with you and they only called up whenever they need of something you will turn your back away from them. May be you can just treat them civilly.
@honest_efforts100 (1607)
• India
7 Jul 12
If I was in your shoes I would try my best to forget them as they honestly did not care about you or your family. I think you are a very emotional person and very easy to hurt. However the Bible says we do not revenge or retaliate. So if you want to maintain your relationship with them it’s okay. Maybe you are one of those chosen few.
