Why am I continuing to try???
By Loverbear
@Loverbear (4918)
United States
March 24, 2012 11:02am CST
I'm sitting here freezing because I can't use my fireplace because my wood "stinks"! They are in the process of raising a ruckus about it.
I had my fireplace going yesterday while I was sewing. I didn't know it was putting out smoke when the neighbors came in. She immediately started taking pictures with her cell phone. Bill called me to warn me so I put the fire out immediately. I went up with a note saying I put the fire out for their comfort (screw mine of course. They are the IMPORTANT ones!!!) The man told me that my fire stunk and that I was burning garbage, when I told him I wasn't he snidely stated "Yeah, sure"...like I was lying. So here I sit freezing because I can't afford to use electric heaters and I don't dare use the fireplace.
I live in the country, we use wood to heat our homes. Sometimes something happens to the wood to make it smell. We have the "city" folks come in and act like this is the big city and they can make their demands because everything isn't pristine like it is in the city. I'm sitting here crying because not only am I cold but all my joints are hurting from the arthritis. I got my stomach pain under control until last night when they arrived and started their campaign. Now my stomach hurts worse than it had before. The man neighbor used to be so kind and nice and he has turned into the biggest a$$hole I've met. It doesn't matter that it's so cold and that my only heat is my wood stove, all that matters is things have to be perfect for them when they arrive.
People like them make putting one foot in front of the other each day miserable. They make a person wonder why they keep trying and fighting. I surrender aready!!! I am so tired of the pain, but to have neighbors that only give a f--k about themselves is too much to take.
Bill is taking me to town for a fun day, what's the point of a fun day when I get to come back to a cold freezing house and neighbors that are so self centered and nasty? I can't stoop to their level, I won't stoop to their level. Why do people feel like they are the only important people in the world and everyone has to bow to them and their wishes.
2 people like this
12 responses
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
I don't like getting nasty with people. I am on the verge of letting them know that if they continue to make my life a living he11 that I am going to file harassment charges against them. I don't go near them, I don't talk to them, I'm not even considered as a living, breathing, feeling, individual worth their time. So why in the world are they continually working at creating problems for me? I am fairly sure it isn't for attention as they get plenty of it from the rest of the neighbors.
Oh well, the rope has reached the end, and the next thing is all out war is going to happen. I don't like the thought, but I also can't continue in the way that things are going.
1 person likes this
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
They really need a wake up call, life doesn't revolve around them. The husband used to be a nice guy. We had him to dinner many times and helped him through many bad times. When he met his present wife his whole personality changed! He now is as awful as his wife is.
I hate Fridays!!! I know that I have to walk on egg shells from Friday through to Monday. I never know when they are going to stay over longer than Sunday afternoon. I also never know when she is going to get another wild hair up her fanny and decide that there is something else I NEED to change to make her happy. So far it has been feeding the cats on the top of my car and the roof of my house. I can't dump ashes or cat litter over my back fence, I can't toss any foodstuffs out for the wild animals, and now I suppose I can't burn in my stove while they are here.
I can't accept that they were catered to them when they were children, I know other people that were catered to when they were kids and they turned out to be wonderful understanding caring individuals. They don't think that the world should revolve around them. Then there are my neighbors...
1 person likes this
@rafiholmes (2896)
• Malaysia
25 Mar 12
whoahh..that a bad situation ur stuck in..cold..freezing..and an Asssshole neighbour..thats too much for some ...
the smoke probably due to some vent problem..chimney perhaps..like the other comment above..
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Part of the smoke problem is the fact that it was windy because of a storm coming in yesterday. The vents, chimney and spark screen are all clean what it was from was that the wood had been smoldering for awhile, and that always creates smoke. I always clean the chimney, spark arrester, and vents at least once a month. I burn pine and pine is a dirtier wood so I climb up on the roof monthly to clean all of the outside stuff and also take care of the inside parts at the same time.
The couple treat the place like the whole forty acres is theirs and no one but they have any rights. I haven't figured out how come they are aiming all their venom at me, if someone farts at the wrong time it's my fault. I've gotten blamed for so much that I haven't done... like the time that the neighbors had their barbque as a heater while they were sitting outside. They were burning the solid styrofoam from a package they had received....I promptly got blamed for it.
@rafiholmes (2896)
• Malaysia
28 Mar 12
wow..thats very irritating..i can feel so pissed too listening to your story..if i have a neighbour like that..what an asss.. thinking that they own the whole area..
@peavey (16936)
• United States
24 Mar 12
If you live within the boundaries of the Homeowner's Association, you have to follow their rules no matter what. If you do live within their boundaries, you must have signed a contract with them.
If you don't live within the boundaries, you don't have to follow their rules, plain and simple.
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
The place that I live in has a home owners association. Because of the fact that it is a recreational development (I live next to a lake) and there are 84 structures and families that use the place, it was decided to establish a homeowners association to keep problems to a minimum. If there are complaints there can be fines levied that cost anywhere from $100 to $500. I can't afford to pay that kind of fine.
I would think that people would realize that this is a country establishment (I live 30 miles from the nearest town) and that there are going to be times that there are objectionable odors. Skunks are the first thing that come to mind. I just can't believe that these people are trying to place "big city" restrictions on a country place where everything is laid back and easy going.
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Wait, are you saying you have a clean chimney, and your wood stinks? What kind of wood? Because we use to burn wood a lot and have burned all kinds and none of them stunk? and you are saying that where you live, they will make you put the fire out? Because that is stupid and the fact they were taking pictures, well unless the smoke was black, I bet it looked good because everyone knows a chimney puts out smoke, that is a no-brainer...
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
25 Mar 12
I burn mostly pine and oak. There is another wood that I can't identify. It might be eucalyptus but I'm not sure. I also use lumber that people have replaced with new stuff. Everyone who is in our development knows this and I get given a lot of their used wood. The smoke wasn't black, it was gray.
The other thing about the smoke is that the wind was blowing severely because a storm front was moving in. I can't control the wind (another no brainer) and at the point that they drove in the wind was blowing in their direction. So of course the smoke was going to be blowing in their direction.
Bill has told me that I WILL have a fire in the fireplace this morning. That I need to take care of me first. That would be okay but I cannot handle the stress from the upset. On our way home from town last night I had a migraine start that was a 20 on the migraine scale of one to ten. My head throbbed, it hurt to move, and I was sure that I was going to throw up. I went to bed as soon as the critters had been fed which was about 8:45 and I got up around 9 this morning. I'm still a bit wiped out but at least the migraine has eased off.
I'll talk to you around 4 p.m. Hugs!
1 person likes this
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
26 Mar 12
I am glad to hear the neighbors left early and again, I am sorry I wasn't here when you called.
I am also sorry you got a migraine from the stress of it all..:( Anyway, it was good to talk to you, perhaps next time we can talk while my son is busy elsewhere so we don't get interrupted so much..lol
I am also sorry you got a migraine from the stress of it all..:( Anyway, it was good to talk to you, perhaps next time we can talk while my son is busy elsewhere so we don't get interrupted so much..lol
@yanzalong (18988)
• Indonesia
24 Mar 12
It would be nice if I could have a look at how houses in the country look like my friend. So, you live in the neighbourhood, when something wrong cropped up many neighbours came in to have a look. Did you use kerosene to burn wood to start fire?
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
The fire was already going. I keep the fire burning throughout the day because of my severe arthritis. I start my fires with paper and small pieces of wood from when we have split wood. I don't add chemicals to my fire, nor do I burn "garbage". It was the fact that the piece of wood was still "wet" and not the dry wood. Plus a lot of the trees around my home are treated with chemicals that I don't know about. Even if I buy the wood I don't know if it has chemicals on it or not.
The whole point is the fact that living 30 miles from the nearest town, waaayyyy out in the country, a person should be cut some slack. It shouldn't be that as soon as the people arrive from their city home they throw a fit because someone is using their fireplace. There should be some give and take and some understanding shown. The attitude shown towards me was that I saw them come in and immediately deliberately made my fire stink just to make them miserable. I had been friends with the husband for years, and he knows how I lived with my Mom and how I live today. But he's been under the influence of this prissy woman for enough time that friendship doesn't matter it's what "SHE" wants, and if it is that my fire has to be put out so she is happy, that's what happens. It doesn't matter to them that they make someone else miserable.
To be honest, when I was writing this discussion I was so depressed and so cold that I didn't want to live.
@yanzalong (18988)
• Indonesia
24 Mar 12
Hi Loverbear, just hang on. Be happy, my friend. My prayer goes to you. I hope things are gonna be okay,right?
@deaconroyal (43)
•
24 Mar 12
Not to sound mean or anything, but why does it matter if your wood stinks? if you live in the country like i did for so many years, the smell of road kill, mainly skunks, were the worst thing to smell. If your cold, light up the fire, screw them. If they do have a legal leg to stand on then crank up the fire until the sheriff comes by with a court order that tells you to stop burning bad smelling wood. The city folk need to learn their place in the world, back in the city if they can stand the smell of the real world. My mother is in a very similar situation to yours. Her neighbors went from being nice to snitches about everything. So what do I have to say about that? have fun wasting your time and energy. As to the pictures taken, you should have broke the phone and told them to get out of your home. Put up a sign that post your state laws about defending yourself and make sure you have no trespassing signs up if they want to start anything with you over it, unless they are doing it the proper legal way. There is no reason to sit in a cold house, unless your like me and refuse to pay for it. =) Best of luck with what sounds to be Yanks.
@deaconroyal (43)
•
24 Mar 12
My mother is also on disability and can not afford propane, but being the son that I am I save up through out the year and buy her 100 gallons every winter and that last her through winter, seeing as we live in Oklahoma and it only gets cold every now and then, and let's her cook during the rest of the year. Her neighbors also let their dogs run around which most of the time is not a big deal but when they start getting in to things we warn the neighbors to make them stop. When they don't we take matters into our own hands. Best of luck with it. My mom sends her prayers and best wishes your way.
@lowyder (282)
• Canada
24 Mar 12
oh my this does not sound please loverbear i would just like to say im sorry you have neighbours like that i live in a small city and the people above me and my girlfreind theres 4 college students landlord said when we moed in (basement apartment) that no parties so we did not dare they get away partyin stomping all hours the night and me and the girl had a arguement when we first got our puppy ... long storry short was about 1am ...they called the police ...well police came in my home like i shoudlnt even be here they said the main people upstairs are haveing problems and said if i was ever a problem again i would be going to jail ... and i did not think this was fair as yes we were bit loud no one calls on them when its oppisote nights.... and we are sleeping under them ..i just think people naturally dont worry bout others when really without otheres we wouldnt have a world to live in ..its just to bad there wasnt a way to review your neighbours before you move ... i would call them up tell them if they have a rpoblem they can REPLACE YOUR FIREWOOD AS IT IS NOT yoUR fault an old tree STINKS it must have gotten wet and dried out in a dark\moist kind of spot were it maybe got some rot in it ... other wise i wouldnt have slightest clue of what it could be sorry for not really helping n postin my own story just tryin to say besides the cold we have neighbourly problems ALL the time with these ppl trying call cops if they stomp n our dog barkks i feel as if they do it 5 times a day on purpose stomp rea,ly loud get our dog going and find it funny...GOODLUCKKK make them give u there wood or just get them there n put ur stuff in n say look it is wood i dont burn garbage ... like why would you it would really stink lol
Best of luckk __LOW
@mensab (4200)
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
well, i hope you get warmed by coffee or soup for your comfort. if you already have made an impression from your neighbors, then it won't do anything if you burn wood to keep you warm. if they complain, then take their complaints. let them take the hospitality that they have abused from you. come on, it is not necessary to suffer under this circumstances.
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
I've been sucking down coffee and tea like crazy to warm up. It warms the inside but doesn't do much for the arthritis. I don't like being cold, and this situation doesn't help anything.
I have been dealing with their complaints and demands for several years now. I have had to change where I feed the feral cats because they cannot control their dog and the dog would come by and clean up the left over cat food. I don't feed the wild animals anymore because SHE doesn't like having the wild animals around (the wild animals are the deer, raccoons, possums etc. Nothing that might attack like bob cats or mountain lions). I don't empty my ashes in the back yard because that creates dust. And the list goes on.
I am not going to do anything with the wood burning stove because of the fact that I physically cannot take the upset. I have chronic gastritis that could escalate into ulcers if I am not careful. I suffer from chronic pain and having additional upset along with the pain make things totally miserable, so I avoid upset at all costs.
It may not be necessary to suffer under the circumstances, but I have no choice at this point in time. I am hoping for another option to present itself to me. I emailed the president of the homeowner's association and hope to hear from him soon. He is one who will clear up the problem post haste.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
24 Mar 12
That is just awful! I think after awhile I would lose my niceties and go up and tell them whatfor. They can't force you not to use your fireplace because they don't like the smell coming from it. If they don't like the smell coming from it they should burn candles or use airfreshner or an air purifier to offset the smell in their own homes to their own noses.
You are sitting there miserable and suffering just to please them. I do still hope you have a good day, and maybe when you get home they'll be gone and you can burn your own wood for your fireplace.
heck I'd probably be apt to say if you don't like the smell of the wood then go get me some that doesn't smell. The fact that the woman came up snapping photos means they were fuming (mad) for awhile.
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
24 Mar 12
Burning candles or using air freshener would be too logical for them. Plus they would need help using it, after all they are "divas" and things should be absolutely perfect for them when they arrive. There shouldn't be one blade of grass out of place, any wild animals in their yard and above all Loverbear shouldn't be burning her fire.
I emailed the head of the homeowners association about this. (The area I live in is a recreational area and there are 84 homes here, so to keep things running smoothly there was a home owners association established. During the week there are two people living here, my boyfriend and myself. We keep an eye on the water system as we are on well water, we keep an eye on the cabins and any problems that might arise from any number of reasons. We also are first response if there is a fire. So, it isn't like the city where there are people here constantly) I told the president of the homeowners association about what happened and that if this continues the couple can start paying for propane or electricity for me to heat my home. I am so tired of living in dread of Fridays and the couple coming in and throwing their weight around. I am very laid back and am busy doing my own thing, which is designing and making teddy bears and jewelry. I don't run around the neighborhood, I don't go outside much either because I am in such constant pain. I really could care less about the neighbors anyhow, they come up here to have fun and I don't want to interrupt their fun. I can't understand why these people feel the need to constantly make my life a living he11.
@mysticmaggie (2498)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Are these people your landlords? If not, why are their rights any more important than yours? They can't make you stay in a freezing apartment when you have the ability to heat it with your wooden stove.
Call city hall, girlfriend, and find out YOUR rights, especially if you are a renter. Many states have renter rights that put owner rights to shame. If you own the property, tell them to take a flying leap or call whoever they would report you to and explain the situation ahead of them.
Now get that durn stove heating! They cannot, and do not have the right to, endanger your life, which is what they are doing.
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Hi Maggie! How are things going on your front? How's hubby???
The people are NOT my landlords. The wife is a property manager and treats the place here like it is one of her properties. Unfortunately it's all aimed at me. I am at the point of getting ready to blow!!! As I told one of the members on the phone they are going to be given the option of buying me out so they can have the place just as they want it. My price is 1.5 million!!!
What is a riot is that they figure that if there is no food outside then the wild animals won't come through. That's a riot because any cooking odor will bring the raccoons and skunks flocking to the area. I had raccoons on my roof last night. Abby went about half nuts barking at them...(the wife will probably report me to the home owners association)
I didn't realize how badly this mess affected me, Bill took me to town yesterday and when it came time to come home I had a migraine hit that was HORRIBLE!!! I got home, fed the critters and went to bed, at 8:30. I woke up at 9:45 this morning. It was one of my 20 on a scale of ten type migraines, with the barfs and everything. The migraine was triggered by the upset and stress over a little bit of stupid smoke.
I already contacted the home owner's association president with what happened. I am sure he rolled his eyes and heaved a huge sigh. He has had a lot of trouble with these two people and this is just another brick on the pile. The couple are turning into the association joke.
When I look at what is going on in my life in comparison to what your dealing with, I feel so stupid! I got up yesterday with the house temperature being a sweltering 45 degrees. It wasn't too much better this morning, and it does tend to aggravate physical problems.
Give hubby a very gentle hug from me. And a ton of hugs to you too lady. Take care of yourself and hubby the best you can. You're in my prayers.
@Kojigirl (188)
•
24 Mar 12
I'd light the fire anyway, regardless. And if they wanted to know what I was burning, I'd invite them in to see what it is. Let them complain, and if they don't like it, ask them for some of their wood. I live in England, people collect wood all over the place where I live here in Wiltshire. As long as it's not one of the protected areas, no one cares.
Why should you have to freeze? We get those city people around here, too. They complain about the smells of the cows and the sound of the church bells, and when they complain to me I tell them to pack up and leave. I like the smells and bells, if they don't they should go back to London. In fact, I wish none of them would leave London, it would make Wiltshire a nicer place.
Stand your ground, you must have rights of some kind!
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
24 Mar 12
Put on your fire! You are nuts if you sit in the cold because of someone else.
Sometimes wood does smell or is smoking more but that should not stop you to use it if there is no other way.
No matter if you have fire or not these neighbours will complain anyway.
