How to make friends with man
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
March 24, 2012 11:39am CST
I am a introvert, and lack of self-confident. Since some bad influence of my family on me. It is so difficult for me to make friends with man. Indeed, I am 25 now, but I never have a boyfriend. But how to meet a boy? How to find male friends?
I seldom talk to man, but I really want to make friends with them.
After reading this discussion, dear friends? Could you like to give me some precious suggestion?
8 responses
@shwetat195 (628)
• India
25 Mar 12
I guess it is troubling you so much that you had to start a discussion and seek advice. please go through the suggestions already given in this discussion. however, i would like you to ask yourself how important is a boyfriend important in your life. I would also suggest you to go through various discussions on relations and boyfriends. Today you are concerned about not able to make boyfriend and then later on if you hurry up on such matters you might post a discussion how to get rid of boyfriend. It might sound funny, however it is my sincere advice not to worry about such matters. When time comes you would for sure have a good caring boyfriend and hubby as well.
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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26 Mar 12
Your idea is very funny, haha! get rid of a boyfriend~
More and more classmates of mine get married, I feel lonely . You are right, I need a good man, if not, I rather be single.But I am 25 now, I hope my MR. right cann't let me wait too long...
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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27 Mar 12
You must be very happy about your life! Congratulations! Could you like to told me how did you meet your MR.right? It must be a romantic story...
@shwetat195 (628)
• India
27 Mar 12
i got my Mr right when i was 32...and i thank god for this....while waiting for my mr right and i accumulated enough wealth to relax and enjoy life now....:)...would say 25 is the time to enjoy and relax...create wealth.....
@lampar (7584)
• United States
26 Mar 12
The condition for making friend with man is about the same as building friendship with women. Some of the basic elements like he is friendly, approachable, attractive, won't give you creepy feeling, and etc... may be more important for you as a female. So it depend quite a lot on your own gut feeling and personal requirement in order to decide which man you want to be friend. There is no standard rule you can follow here as far as make friends with man. Just remember it is not something you want to rush into, take your time and let's it come naturally if possible, without a man as friend today doesn't mean that you are not going to have your happiness, meaningful life or whatever goal you want to reach in the future.
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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27 Mar 12
My goal? I want to marry with a good man, and have a happy family. I want to get a satisfied job with high income which can support my living. Wish I can achieve it in near future.
@erielle (1280)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Find something that interests you. Jogging,rollerblading, going to the library. Anything. You meet people by having interests and showing that you are active in these interests. People are attracted to like minded people. You have to give people a reason to like you. Show them who you are. Don't be afraid. Don't be insecure. You'll be ok. Get yourself out there. You are insecure mostly because of lack of experience. A lot of people have the same problem as you do. It's no big deal. Most people can sense when you are nervous and they'll make you feel better. That's what people are for. We don't want to scare our potential friends away! So smile, and get ready to make friends! :)
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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26 Mar 12
Sometimes when I keep a happy mood, I found every thing will gonna to be ok. What's my hobby? Let me see...Er...shopping, searching the internet,singing karaoke!
Thanks for your advice, I never think other people have the same problem too. I am too nervous. Maybe I need to be relaxed, then face it ,and get over it.
@maezee (41988)
• United States
24 Mar 12
I am also somewhat of an introvert. Here's an idea though: pretend you are not. Practice being chatty and making small talk ALL THE TIME. Whether you are checking out at the grocery store, meeting a friends' friend, talking to the mail man - just do it. It's practice that you need at being sociable and appearing to be confident with yourself. People really go for the confident, no-holds-barred types. I work in customer service and I used to be really shy. Now I am not. I strike up conversations with people, laugh, and try to be as easy-going as I can. Truly, I am an introvert and I do have some insecurities in life and I am not as confident as I should be, but you have to remind yourself of what makes you great. For me, I like to acknowledge (out loud): I have a sense of humor. I can have my good (appearance) days. I am goal oriented. I care for others. Remind yourself of why you like yourself. Sometimes it's easy to get lost in those insecurities. SO do that, and start "acting" a little more confident with people, like by talking to strangers. You'll find you get used to it quite quickly.
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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25 Mar 12
It seems that you change your introverted character successfully and become a confident girl. I always look down on myself, I think I am not as capable as others. My appearing is not as beautiful as others, I am not tall and thin enough, I am not rich...My shortcoming always bother me.
Just as you said, Pretending I am not! It makes me recall a teacher of mine, he put a note in my exercise book which said : saying you will be successful to yourself everyday, then fortune will come to you.
@else22 (4317)
• India
25 Mar 12
A few years back I was an introvert too.Shy to meet and talk to others.It was then that my father expired.He was the only bread winning member of our family.After him all responsibilities of our family fell on my shoulders.I knew it was impossible for me to discharge my duties without giving up my shyness and introvert nature.After pondering over the problem deeply I came to the conclusion that I would have to start talking to others as that was the only way to get rid of my shyness.I would like to suggest you to adopt the same formula.Start doing what you want to do.Take your problem head on and you will solve it.
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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26 Mar 12
Another success case of mylot members!
I think shyness is a big block in the way of my life. I have a dream that I can perform a problem in front of lots of people. But I just afraid to do it.
@xiaohongxiaohong (340)
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26 Mar 12
I will try it, the question is ---easier said than done... anyway, thanks for your responses.