Friend who never has ANY money.... Rant alert!!!! Help

This may not be what you want to hear but it is the truth so forgive me if I come across as being harsh or cold hearted. You friend has become institutionalized and has the belief that it is not her responsibility to take care of her self. Her mentality is why should I work when I can get others to pay my way. You will find that if you keep doing things like not giving her smokes and other things that she always ask you for then she will quite coming around; because you stop enabling her life style. The real question that you have to ask yourself is what are her true motives for being your friend in the first place. To avoid any type of falling out between the two of you what you could do is give her small task to do around your place and pay her accordingly. She will be happy to do the small task or she will stop coming around all together. I have no doubt that you care for her or you would not be looking for a answer to save your friendship with her. The problem is that she is the only one that can change her life for the better. All that you can do is be as mentally supportive as possible not monetarily. The next bit of advice that I have to offer to you is one of which you will have to be open minded to accept for its true value. There are two book that I would like for you to read that will answer your question better than I could ever hope to. The first is Think and Grow Rich then the second is Out Witting the Devil. Both books are written by Dr. Napoleon Hill and will give you a greater understanding of why your friend is the way that she is, as well as how to help her if and only if she wants to change. http://www.naphill.org/ The site that I have listed above is where you can find both of Dr. Hills works as well as all of his life's works. Or you can find both books on audible.com if you are like me and do not slow down enough to read much. I wish you all the best and hope that thing work out for you in your friendship. It is never easy to get people to see their short comings. All that you can do is offer advice to her and let her make her own decisions. Take care...

I used to have a friend just like this back in university. Although we were good friends, I got annoyed that he always had nothing. We would go out with friends, and I always end up paying for him. He joined and exclusive club (mostly rich people, I don't know how he got in), and he would always wore my shirts. Anyway, I just put that in the past. He's now a big shot at IBM in California! Maybe your friend would also wake up one day, and make something of herself.

I would be getting annoyed at her myself. I've been in that situation, as being the one THAT broke, but I always had a few bucks to do something with and even if it meant spending my few bucks on my friends, I would. Now I HAD a friend who doesn't have a job, we didn't have a job at the same time and both of us went together to look for one. I found one and to my knowledge she still hasn't. She spends her boyfriend's money and on things she doesn't need to. She is a spendaholic, and THAT annoys me. I am the type of person who feels if I am broke I need to do something to change that, and I also know I have to STOP with the fun times and start with the getting myself a job times.

Be blunt with her. Sounds like she needs someone to give her a kick in the butt. She needs to go try to get a job, stop smoking when she doesn't have money for it, and get to work.

Have you told her how you feel.Also perhaps you should tell her that it is not the right thing to do, keep expecting things handed to her on a plate, where as you have to work for all the things that you have, as well as all the things that you want to do.Perhaps you should suggest that she sell a few of her things, that she no longer needs or uses, as then she will have money.Most of all your friend needs to stand on her own two feet and get a job, rehab or no rehab is not a good excuse.