When You Can't Find Something

I have that problem all the time. I put two sales books where I could find them again easily. Right!!! It took 6 weeks before I found them, in the desk where they belong. It is a normal occurrence in my home. It seems like it's always stuff that I put in a spot where I can "find it again" easily. I do have a drawer that is exclusively for my medications so that I don't have the problem of their "growing legs" and going someplace they don't belong. Your Mom's behavior is learned from her parents. It seems that it is a much easier way to deal with life than to take responsibility for actions and apologize for their accusations. It's now a habit that your Mom doesn't realize that she is doing. Sometimes a quiet talk with the person helps. I know I had that problem with my Mom and I sat down one day and had a talk with her about blaming others, and surprisingly it did make a difference. As I told her, blaming others for what happens comes from a deep set need to be perfect. It could be something that was stressed as she was growing up that she had to be perfect, or something she forced on herself to do to try to make her parents proud of her. (Mom's parents were very abusive and continually told her how stupid she was and how she would never amount to anything. Things like that drive a small child to the point of obsession trying to get the parents to just once praise them for something they accomplished. It's like a quest to find that one thing that they can do to find approval from the people who are the most important adults in a child's life.) Anyhow, Mom would blame everyone but herself for everything. After a talk with her, I found Mom was less blaming and judgmental. When your Mom does this, just remember that it might be a result of something that happened when she was a child. It could be that she was trying hard to measure up to her parents expectations without success. It could come from peers taunting her. There are any number of reasons for a person's behavior, and if you do some detective work you may find the reason for your Mom's actions. It won't replace the desire of having a decent parent, but it could help you understand her behavior.

well sorry to hear bout the mix up with meds lol ,good thing they figured out where they were and that you didn't have part in putting them in the microwave . my grandmother was bad for this as well leaving her sleeping pills in the bed with her sometimes and would say i snuck in while she was passed out and taking them 1.I DID NOT need sleeping meds so i didn;t take any 2. i respected her and just had more morall value than that ..but i also have a tendancy now that i am older to misplace things when i think ther in a safe place like book or drawer or bathroom ,couch, under sink, under bed ....anywheres under the SUN!!!lol litterly though i guess but ya i feel your pain and best way is just tell them stop putting them somewhere they will not find and go to hardware store pick up a lock box with 2 keys one for mom one for dad.. then they will never have an issue again..lol please let me know if that helps at all as i know if it is stored and locked only they can be responsible for access after that point.

I think that many people intend to put it there, so it won't get lost, but that really is what happened. They put it in an area where it does in fact get lost to say the very least. There are just many times where people place something in a different container, put something in something, thinking that there is no way possible that they can lose it right there when you think about it. That is a good idea in theory, but less so in practice. But really it does not work out as well. And people tend to blame anyone but themselves. Even if that was there brilliant idea in the first place. Even if you really had nothing to do with. Then again, some people really are just not able to really keep the best track of their possessions but that is just the nature of life. It is rather frustrating to get blamed, when you had nothing to do with. Its been a road that I've been down.