So Should I Just Be Keeping Quiet?

No, it's ok. It's just that the last time when you were complaining about the person not wanting advice from you and you not wanting advice from her, that seemed easy enough to remedy. If neither of you wants advice from the other, then the logical thing to do would be to stop giving it to each other. Neither of you is going to listen to the other, you aggravate each other, so just stop. You both are convinced of your stance on diabetes and nothing is going to change either of your minds. You've had your say and that's all you can do. Move on. It's hard when you have a lot o0f health problems. Fibromyalgia, I wish you lived nearby. There is an alternative healer in VT who specializes in that and is very, very good. In Vermont, they have to be certified Drs and alternative healers. In NY, they have to be both, too, but they mostly go to the big money areas. Poor areas like ours don't get them. The alt healer gave me ginsing, but everyone is different. So he'd have to talk to you. I didn't have high blood pressure then, so I could have ginseng. It can make people's pressures go up. That's why you need to see an actual Dr. I think if you had a job where you were happier, the stress level would be less and many things would either lessen or resolve themselves. Also if your Church invited Faith Healers or did its own version of a healing circle, that would be nice.

I think one of the great things about myLot is that you can pick and choose the discussions you want to respond to. So if people aren't interested in what you have to say, then they can show you so by staying quiet themselves. There's a lot of support to be gained from your myLot friends. I've not been feeling so hot myself recently, and knowing that people cared enough to respond was encouraging. So for me, please, keep posting. I really hope everything turns a corned for you soon.

I relate, and I think that our health care system is ridiculous. I have to pay nearly $500 a month for insurance, and those premiums are set to go up in July. I also have to pay close to $200 a month for medication. Doctor visits are $25, and God forbid I should have to go to Urgent Care or the Emergency Room because it's $50 for Urgent Care, and $100 for the ER. Hospital stays are $200 a day. Yes, I know exactly how you feel. By the way, I have Chronic Back Pain, Asthma, Allergies, four different skin conditions, Astigmatism, and I'm Bipolar Type II. People can say what they want, but until they walk a day in my shoes, they don't have a clue what's it's really like. It's like you always have to pretend that things are great, even though your life is falling apart.

so sorry dear. iam at a point where i thought some are trying to run me off mylot. i go back and forth from saying maybe i should quit, to maybe not give them the satisfaction as ive had a bunch of people tell me my discussions are good and interesting. even when i complain about my life they come into the discussion and help. now thats true friends of which i have mostly on here and so do you. so i wouldnt let some get me down. we want to hear how you are doing. i agree with greenmo, your first respionder, if they dont want to read or respond, they should just go on. why do people pop into our discussions with just negative things to say to us? I'll tell you why, cause some have such a crappy life them selves, it makes them feel good maybe to make us feel bad? only thing i can think. i dont understand it though. so, dont let a couple of people here get you down. keep on posting and ignore their negativity!

I think perhaps people do not understand what it is like to have a chronic condition. I also may be wrong but I think you sharing it with us here gives you a constructive way of dealing with it. It is part of doing what you can to get better.. so don't listen to them - they don't get it ... yet.

I feel that it is important for you to get your feelings out in the open. Randy is diabetic and he also has a serious foot condition called Charot's Foot and we both feel that one of the best medicines for him is to talk about his conditon. We are learning that unless people share the same experiences you do, most do not want to hear it. I know that my sister in law had sent me a nasty email back after I told her what was going on with Randy. Her email stated, "sorry Randy is sick, however it is unfair of you to expect me to quit my job, leave my husband and kids, to come out and help". First off I never asked for her help (and believe me she is the last person I would ask)and secondly, since she is family I actually thought she cared (obviously I was wrong). You should never hide your true feelings and it is important to share because it helps with the healing process.

I wouldn't say you should keep quiet; but what you can do is watch who you do vent to about your issues. You know for the most part which people who are in your every day life will act what way; you should make sure to vent only to those who will give you the most benefit in return. Try not to let on how bad you feel to those who will only give you silly advice that is unrelated, or those who think that you are simply complaining for attention. Editing whom you actually vent to will help you a lot.

Hi Tina, Not everyone responds this way. There are people who are keen on following up on your progress. Just direct your message to them, and ignore the ones who comment negatively. Obviously, there are those who haven't gone through what you have, so they find it easy to criticize. Been going through what you have myself, so I can understand. Take care.

I guess I haven't known you long enough to make that kind of judgment, I mean from the posts I have seen, mostly on your health, (at the moment I can't recall anything about your job, I don't even know what you do..lol)and I know a few people who deal with chronic pain, it isn't something you just take an aspirin for and move on, it is a daily challenge to get through the day. So if you have any updates, I would continue to let us know, some of us do care..

hi tina wow things are really getting to you. I have had times like that too. with me it seems at times like the kitchen staff like to make things really hard for all the diabetics here. they nade such an issue when I came here,hurting, scar ed,not wanting to live here and the last thing I needed to hear was we do not make diabetic meals here. o k a y got it. so I have to c ut back and sometimes refuse most of whats on my plate or else have high blood sugar which will m ess up my body..then other days we have mostly food that i can act ually eat all of it too. I do know what its like to ' be a diabetic too.but finally got the b umpy rash on my leg to clear up by using a certain prescription ointment I was given by the wound specialist. the only thing is ths bumpy stuff will be gone for say two months then it comes back. but this ointment does keep it from getting like it did before. now it does not make my leg swell and weep like it did that first time. Tina don't let some judgmental people here get you down. a lot of us have similar problems and we do and can feel for you. How can they say you are too judgmental or do not try to help yourself.The only way any one can truthfully judge another is to live in their shoes for a week.I doubt they would be coming down on you then. I know what a problem you have had getting that wound healed. so many do not realize that a diabetic's wounds take a long time to heal. I have a scab from a skinned knee and it has taken me weeks for it to get really small.My opinion is people here should not be criticizing you when they have no idea what its like to live with diabetes and fibromyalagia everyday.Chin up and realize things will get better in time.God really is Good but he works in his own time it seems like.

I don't think you should stop talking about it. This is a good place to vent and a good place to get advice and such from other people. I think you need this outlet, there are always going to be people in every situation who are not kind, but sometimes people are blunt because they care perhaps some of the people are not trying to be critical but are actually trying to help by being blunt and outright honest, some people just don't know how to communicate those things in a way that does not sound mean, although they mean well. I do want to say that God is there to give us guidance and strength but it is us who have to change our own lives. The healthier you get the more your pain will go away. You do have a lot going on though and I do feel badly for you. I have diabetes my self and I fight it every day of my life. I am angry that I even have it but I am determined to beat it. My life is so much better now that I have taken control of my health.

I am all ears and eyes, and I have time to listen, time to share my experiences, and time to learn from yours. So out with it, even if it is a rant.

Hi Tina! No don't keep quiet. This is a safe place to share your thoughts. Most people are familiar with type 2 and type 1, but they don't know about your type. They probably can't relate to your situation because they've never walked a mile in your shoes. You might get some judgmental comments but I think most people are supportive. Lifestyle change isn't going to magically make you better, because you don't have the type of diabetes that is most common among the fat and 40 crowd. I feel that you have a lot to share with the people here. If anyone doesn't want to read about it they can skip and go on to the next discussion. Take care my dear friend.

I have a big part of what you are mentioning and who knows what more (at least 3 different auto immune diseases). Fact is: if you have a chronic disease nobody is interested. This includes the doctor, family, friends etc. The longer you have it the less interesting it is. Mostly because you hide what you have (and in good times nobody will notice and they also get used to you having it). It won't help to complain because people do get tired of that, but also it's not ok for yourself. It will only make you more aware of what you have and the fact you can not handle it at the moment. So what to do? I try to be optimistic, and in very bad times I go to bed early, stay out of the way of people (since I can have a bad mood too if I am in a lot of pain). I don't think btw that people get tired of but more they don't know how to respond. If you give up on yourself others will do so too. So try to chear up yourself no matter how hard it will be. Try to pamper yourself in any way and don't be too hard on yourself. I know I am and there are times I can't stand my body not wanting what my always active, busy, creative mind wants. Its frustrating but by now I know I can't win this battle anyway. So it's better to enjoy, to find something to keep my mind busy and not focused on what I can't do.

I do find myself feeling the same way about some things going on in life though it's important to you, it may annoy others. I've found just keeping my lips zipped unless someone asks to be helpful. However, I know it's hard when you don't always have alot of people to talk about it or have walked in similar shoes to discuss daily aspects of things. I feel like I annoy people with my problems as well. But it seems many of us do that in various formats.

Dear Tina, Just respond to discussions when you feel like it. We are here for you and understand completely. I will keep you in my prayers. I hope you feel better soon. Have a good weekend!

In myLot, there are many topics being discussed. If you like the topics then you response. If you dislike or have no idea on it then do not response. Of course it take all sorts of people to make the world. Some are good, they give good advice in the response. Some who are nasty, they criticize by tearing you down without thinking of your feelings. Constructive criticism however, is good as it is a advice which we can learn from. Nevertheless, destructive criticism can destroy a person life. So give good discussion in response. Cheers!

Some people critize anything and everything. Don't take it to heart. Healthy people might not understand. They don't seem to understand what it is like to have health problems, and seem to think it is the disabled person's fault. Of course not all normal people are like this, but even the most compassionate person, doesn't know what it is like until it happens to them.

Don't worry too much about what some people write in here. I know that for a handful that want to listen, read, and help you; there are even more who wouldn't relate, and may even be critical to all that you're going through. As people have the right to pick and choose which discussions they want to respond to, I think you also have the right to pick and choose which ones you should really understand (as opposed to the ones that you should just disregard).

NO one relates to you the way you want them to people will always let you down if you let them. So dont take it to hard try to take peices of their information and use it